Was it something I said?

[Clodfobble]

I think jim's got the gist of it. I don't know how many lines of inquiry you are pursuing simultaneously, but I suspect for most people it is several. One starts to look a little promising, and they back off on the others for awhile until they see how it pans out.

I think also the rejection level is just going to feel higher overall, because in real life we are constantly evaluating and rejecting people without their really knowing it. You get a feel for who that coworker is just by observation, and figure out that they're not really your cup of tea before you ever have to email them about their hobbies and personality.