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Old 09-08-2020, 01:34 AM   #6061
xoxoxoBruce
The future is unwritten
 
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If it wasn't happening we'd see live coverage of the roving camera guys taking a leak.
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The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.
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Old 09-09-2020, 11:47 PM   #6062
xoxoxoBruce
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Karen wants an apple...
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Old 09-12-2020, 11:09 AM   #6063
xoxoxoBruce
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• Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery.
• A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative.
• Practice safe eating; always use condiments.
• Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.
• He used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded.
• A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
• Corduroy pillows are making headlines.
• Is a book on voyeurism a peeping tome?
• Sea captains don't like crew cuts.
• Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
• A successful diet is the triumph of mind over platter.
• A gossip is someone with a great sense of rumor.
• Without geometry, life is pointless.
• When you dream in color, it's a pigment of your imagination.
• Reading while sunbathing makes you well-red.
• A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
• Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.
• When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.
• A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.
• What's the definition of a will? (Come on, it's a dead giveaway!)
• In a democracy your vote counts. In feudalism, your count votes.
• A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
• If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.
• With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
• When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.
• The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.
• You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
• He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
• Every calendar's days are numbered.
• A lot of money is tainted. 'Taint yours and it taint mine.
• A boiled egg is hard to beat.
• He had a photographic memory that was never developed.
• Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.
• Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine .
• When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.
• Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.
• Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
• Acupuncture is a jab well done.
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Old 09-12-2020, 11:59 AM   #6064
BigV
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Seen on the reader board outside a supermarket :

Lettuce Meat Olive Your Egg-spectations!


I LOLed
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Old 09-12-2020, 02:43 PM   #6065
Gravdigr
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Quote:
If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.
Hee!
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These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.
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Old 09-13-2020, 10:33 PM   #6066
xoxoxoBruce
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Rats, stud bull rats...
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Old 10-05-2020, 09:36 PM   #6067
Gravdigr
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Name:  2020.JPG
Views: 424
Size:  23.9 KB

Name:  ozzy.JPG
Views: 440
Size:  38.6 KB
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These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.
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