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Old 07-09-2015, 09:32 AM   #1
footfootfoot
To shreds, you say?
 
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Ask the Transparent

Clearly, you're in for some dad jokes.

Why cant you hear a pterodactyl use the bathroom? Because the p is silent
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Old 07-09-2015, 11:39 AM   #2
glatt
 
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Nice!

Bathrooms and dinosaurs. The perfect combination for kids' humor.
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Old 07-09-2015, 12:44 PM   #3
Clodfobble
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Why does a chicken coop have two doors?



Because if it had four doors, it would be a chicken sedan.
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Old 07-09-2015, 04:14 PM   #4
Gravdigr
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Why can't you hear rabbits screw?

They have cotton balls.
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Old 07-09-2015, 05:27 PM   #5
lumberjim
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My best Dad joke perpetrated to date:

this was only a few months ago.... in April or May.... The kids and I were ate Wegman's and Spencer picked up a vacuum pack of 5 ears of corn. All pre-husked and perfect. 5 ears for $4.99.

I said, "wow. That's expensive. But it IS Pirate Corn." and dummied up.

He said, 'Pirate Corn?'

"Yeah, it's a buck-an-ear"

He hi fived me


~credit to Perth.
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Old 07-09-2015, 05:32 PM   #6
Clodfobble
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What happens if you don't pay the exorcist?



They'll repossess the house.
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Old 07-09-2015, 05:59 PM   #7
sexobon
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When kids have a runny nose and the sniffles I tell them:

You know what they say, if your nose runs and your feet smell ... you're upside down!
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Old 07-09-2015, 06:23 PM   #8
monster
who stole my trashcan?
 
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What do you call a one-eyed dinosaur?

Doyouthineksaurus
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Old 07-09-2015, 06:44 PM   #9
monster
who stole my trashcan?
 
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A man on the street, dressed only in saran wrap, was brought to the psych ward. The doctor came in to see him, looked down, and said, "Well, I can clearly see your nuts

The invisible man married the invisible woman. the kids were nothing to look at either.

Assistant: Doctor the invisible man has come for his check up.
Doctor: Tell him I can't see him.
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Old 07-10-2015, 03:43 PM   #10
footfootfoot
To shreds, you say?
 
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Did you hear about the marriage between a car antenna and satellite dish? The wedding was so so, but the reception was fantastic!
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Old 08-08-2015, 01:33 PM   #11
wolf
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Knock, knock.
Who's there?
HIPPA
HIPPA who?
I can't tell you.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using Tapatalk
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Old 08-08-2015, 02:32 PM   #12
Gravdigr
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HIPAA?

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Old 08-08-2015, 02:36 PM   #13
Lamplighter
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federal health plan rules - medical confidentiality
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Old 08-08-2015, 02:57 PM   #14
Gravdigr
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Yeah, but, I was wondering if that was what Wolf meant.

HIPPA vs. HIPAA

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Old 08-08-2015, 07:39 PM   #15
monster
who stole my trashcan?
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
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Posts: 28,955
What color is Sherlock Holmes' front door?

Yellow


Why?

It's a Lemon Entry, my dear Watson.
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