The Cellar  

Go Back   The Cellar > Cellar-related > Cellar Meta

Cellar Meta Users, threads, etiquette, posting, usage, forums, why this place matters or doesn't

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 02-24-2009, 11:48 PM   #1
Undertoad
Radical Centrist
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Cottage of Prussia
Posts: 31,423
Dear Cellar:

It was suggested that I post each "Contact Us" to its own thread. Then everybody can answer the message and I can send the answers to the person.

We start

------------------------------

From: kim @ The Cellar
Subject: The Cellar Contact Us Form - I have a question


The following message was sent to you via the The Cellar Contact Us form by kim.

------------------------------

I was thinking about getting a monkey and i was wondering if monkeys are legal in california and if certain types of monkeys are legal in certain states?

Thanks,
Kim
Undertoad is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-2009, 11:50 PM   #2
Aliantha
trying hard to be a better person
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Posts: 16,493
Dear Kim,

I don't think you need a monkey.

The Cellar.
__________________
Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber
Aliantha is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-2009, 11:56 PM   #3
lumberjim
I can hear my ears
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 25,571
kim,

It realy depends on what you intend to DO with the monkey. If you intend to eat it, it is NOT legal in California, but legal in Kentucky. If you intend to MARRY the monkey, you can only do that in Oklahoma. If you just want to keep it as a pet, you can do that in any state except Mississippi, provided you get a permit.
__________________
This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality
Embrace this moment, remember
We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan
lumberjim is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-2009, 11:56 PM   #4
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
Bonjour Mme Kim:

Do you have a laaaahzhanzce fhor zat meeenkey?

Bon chance!

Teh Cellar
__________________
Be Just and Fear Not.
BigV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2009, 12:04 AM   #5
Nirvana
Back in 10
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 3,684
Dear Kim ,
Don't you like your face?
__________________
Speaking simply... do not confuse this with having a simple mind.
Nirvana is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2009, 01:06 AM   #6
wolf
lobber of scimitars
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Phila Burbs
Posts: 20,774
Dear Kim,

Spanking the monkey doesn't involve an actual monkey.

Offer void where prohibited by law and good taste.

Except in Nebraska.
__________________
wolf eht htiw og

"Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island

High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis
wolf is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2009, 05:27 AM   #7
ZenGum
Doctor Wtf
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Badelaide, Baustralia
Posts: 12,861
Monkeys are legal in California, but only for medical purposes.

You may marry your monkey, but only if it is a heterosexual relationship.
__________________
Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008.
Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.
ZenGum is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2009, 07:55 AM   #8
classicman
barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy.
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 23,401
Kim,

Thank you for your inquiry. Good luck with your monkey.
Just don't spank it, that can cause blindness - or so I'm told.
__________________
"like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt
classicman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2009, 08:01 AM   #9
sweetwater
lives inside a Mobius strip
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,120
Kim,

Nobody 'thinks' about getting a monkey, they just get them on impulse. If anyone 'thought' about them and the hassle they can be, then they'd leave them in their environments and picture-books.
Also, you wouldn't look good in a yellow hat.
__________________
I knew I shoulda taken that left turn at Albuquerque! - Bugs Bunny
sweetwater is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2009, 08:30 AM   #10
glatt
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 27,717
Kim,
Monkeys are evil. This is well established fact. Don't be foolish. Get a nice mutt instead. You will be happier.
glatt is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2009, 09:52 AM   #11
Trilby
Slattern of the Swail
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 15,654
Kim,

I'd have to see the look on the monkey's face before I would feel comfortable about advising you on purchase.

Love,
Brianna
__________________
In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic.

"Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her.
—James Barrie


Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum
Trilby is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2009, 10:10 AM   #12
HungLikeJesus
Only looks like a disaster tourist
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: above 7,000 feet
Posts: 7,208
Dear Kim,

Quote:
Originally Posted by juju View Post
I don't understand the whole pet thing. Seems like slavery to me.
__________________
Keep Your Bodies Off My Lawn

SteveDallas's Random Thread Picker.
HungLikeJesus is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2009, 10:28 AM   #13
LabRat
twatfaced two legged bumhole
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,143
are you going to actually send this back to them? if so, i vote for sweetwater's. the yellow hat bit made me laugh out loud.
__________________
Strength does not come from how much weight you can lift, or how many miles you can run. It comes from knowing that you set a goal, and rose to the challenge. Strength comes from within.
LabRat is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2009, 11:07 AM   #14
Shawnee123
Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya?
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 21,206
Dear Kim:

See, the thing about monkeys is...you never really have a monkey; ultimately, the monkey has you.

May I suggest you start with Sea Monkeys and see how that goes?

Sincerely,

Teh Cellar
__________________
A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice.
--Bill Cosby
Shawnee123 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2009, 11:30 AM   #15
footfootfoot
To shreds, you say?
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet!
Posts: 18,449
Dear Kim,
We have a saying: "Monkey see, monkey do." If I have to spell it out for you in plain English that means if your monkey sees you, which is highly probable given that you are his owner and caretaker, then he will feel compelled to do you. Is that really what you want? An inter-species relationship? Please think this through.
__________________
The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs
footfootfoot is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 05:28 AM.


Powered by: vBulletin Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.