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Relationships People who need people; or, why can't we all just get along?

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Old 09-29-2006, 07:09 PM   #16
Beestie
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Do things that make people curious. And smile. A lot.
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Old 09-29-2006, 07:32 PM   #17
capnhowdy
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Stop being shy.

And even if you can't stop, quit admitting it. With the right attitude, you won't have to meet people. They'll be meeting you.
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Old 09-29-2006, 09:59 PM   #18
WabUfvot5
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Develop a drug habit. Doesn't have to be illegal but that makes the bond all the better.
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Old 09-30-2006, 10:23 AM   #19
Hoof Hearted
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Quote:
Originally Posted by capnhowdy
Stop being shy.

And even if you can't stop, quit admitting it. With the right attitude, you won't have to meet people. They'll be meeting you.
I have to agree. You can BE shy, but no one else has to know you ARE shy!

I shocked my mother when we threw my sister's baby shower several years ago. We had about 50 people over and I jumped up and took charge of everyone, organizing the activities and making announcements in front of everyone. Mother was FLABBERGASTED! (if you knew how shy I was, you'd be, too)

After everyone left Mom questioned me and asked about the transformation...I told her I may be shy, but the people there didn't know me or know that I was shy. I had nothing to lose so I was the life of the party.

I think my hubby has been a big influence on breaking me out of my shell. We are very secure in our marriage and that security has made me bold. I talk to strangers...at the grocery I'll strike up little conversations with other customers in aisles/lines and with the cashiers and baggers, I'll speak to anyone who asks me questions about my car (a noticeable 'vette).

I'd suggest practicing having small conversations with random people in public places like I mentioned above. You will find that people like a little bit of friendly/funny interaction. I joked the other day with an older man who was having trouble finding the cereal he wanted because of all the brightly colored boxes. I told him it wasn't just him! As you get more comfortable initiating these little social interactions, you can progress to longer conversations. I've found that people like to talk about themselves, so I ask questions and listen.
hh
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Old 09-30-2006, 11:26 AM   #20
morethanpretty
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hoof Hearted
I'd suggest practicing having small conversations with random people in public places like I mentioned above. You will find that people like a little bit of friendly/funny interaction. Ihh
I'm a cashier and I find its better to be friendly w/ my customers, I try to remember my regulars, and when I have someone new in I try to make sure I ask how their meal was. Often times I joke w/ customers, I stutter and slur my words alot so I just roll my eyes and say "I know how to talk I swear!" When I first started cashiering it took me along time to get used to it because of my speech impediment but it helped me talk and I'm better at conversing now too. I've become more outgoing at school and in public places and when I go to a restraunt I actually analyze the cashiers performance and compare it to mine and the other cashiers at my store. Basically my point is practice can make a big difference.
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Old 09-30-2006, 01:24 PM   #21
Elspode
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I have met the most people (speaking in generic terms, here) by being active in my chosen community. In my case, it is centered around Pagan activities/interests, but not all of those (maybe not even *most*) are actually religious/spiritual activities.

More or less organized groups with some sort of common ground/cause/aspirations are great places to meet people.
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Old 10-03-2006, 08:38 AM   #22
xoxoxoBruce
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Originally Posted by bbro
My biggest problem is that I am shy and the bar helps with that, that is why I spend so much time there (that and I am a closet drunk), but that's not all I like to do, ya know?
Join AA, you'll have more friends than you'll know what to do with....and no free time to worry about anything else.
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And why is it easier for me to pay 1600 for a washer and dryer, but I have a problem spending 1200 on a laptop??
Hell, Dell has new(recon?) PCs for under $500. And since you always have clean clothes, you're always welcome here in the Cellar.
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Old 10-12-2006, 09:24 PM   #23
morethanpretty
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THIS.
is how some people meet new people.
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Old 10-14-2006, 07:13 PM   #24
joelnwil
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OMG! I would have to be sporting one of those 4-hour Cialis erections to go for one of those girls. And even then...

I probably will not be able to sleep tonight because that pic will be in my nightmares. Thanks a lot, more...
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Old 10-21-2006, 02:57 PM   #25
extemporaneous
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music

i'm sure you like some kind of music ... and i have found people can connect easily at concerts or small local clubs. or you can hold demonstrations ... candles or even sex demos ... or AA meetings. but they bore me.
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Old 10-22-2006, 02:03 PM   #26
Buddug
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I met my husband in a bar in Monte Carlo . I dropped a cigarette and he picked it up for me .

The trouble is that no one is allowed to smoke any more . Perhaps you could try dropping a handkerchief ? Or better still : a hint ?
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Old 12-05-2006, 12:57 PM   #27
Sundae
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I'm considering an evening class. I have previously been put off by years of people saying, "Oh why don't you join an evening class, you're bound to meet someone!"

I don't want to meet "someone" necessarily, but it will get me out of the flat one evening a week and give me something to talk about.

I couldn't find anything I was really interested in (wanted to take up Urbane Guerilla's calligraphy suggestion, but nothing available locally). So I have decided to take a starter course in Hindi. Well, why not? Going to take my application form in tomorrow before I change my mind!
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Old 12-05-2006, 01:24 PM   #28
rkzenrage
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I try "Howdy".
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Old 12-05-2006, 02:04 PM   #29
bbro
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rkzenrage
I try "Howdy".
See, if I could do that, I wouldn't have this problsm.....I am horribly shy. Probably bordering on that thing that Paxil is for? Oh crap I forget. Shoot. For example, there's this guy I know. Very cool, really doesn't go out that much so if I wanna just hang out, I can go over there. The thing is, I can't make myself call him. I did it once with no problems, but there is just something that embarasses me. I don't know what it is. I think it is a problem with talking on the phone.

Every once in a while, I am great with talking to new people, just striking up a conversation. The problem comes when they say - gimme a call, we'll hang out. I just can't do it. If I do, I am completely red the entire time.

Meh - I will eventually meet new people, I was just lonely when I started the thread.

I still want to join a pottery class, but haven't had the money yet.
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Old 12-05-2006, 02:05 PM   #30
rkzenrage
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We are very different...
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