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Old 08-19-2012, 06:00 AM   #241
Griff
still says videotape
 
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That was interesting. We all draw our own lines. I'm growing a new Kombucha mother on the counter right now...
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Old 08-25-2012, 07:04 AM   #242
Trilby
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I fukced up again. I binged. Only three days this time and quit on wednes. but brain/typing co ordination is off off off to the point of annoying to type.

yeah. I fucked up. isn't that grand? maybe If I was all big Bookie I would be fucking cured.
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In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic.

"Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her.
—James Barrie


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Old 08-25-2012, 07:27 AM   #243
limey
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Oh hugs Bri! Big hugs. You quit on Wednesday, that's the most important thing.
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Old 08-25-2012, 07:39 AM   #244
Griff
still says videotape
 
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Sorry Bri. Hang in there.
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Old 08-25-2012, 07:59 AM   #245
glatt
 
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So what made you stop the binge? I don't have any personal experience there, so I'm wondering how that works. Do you just feel so crappy you stop? Seems like it would be so easy to keep going for a while.

I'm glad you found a way to stop. We still love you here.
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Old 08-25-2012, 09:20 AM   #246
monster
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Glad you're back
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Old 08-25-2012, 11:01 AM   #247
Trilby
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thanks, all.

Glatt - I stopped b/c I ran out of money AND I felt like shite and I knew it would only get worse and worse and I am sick of going to the very compassionate doc that I have (and he really is a good one) and letting him down AGAIN. So, lots of things there. BIggest reason, though, to be honest? no money. I"d probably still be drinking. My sister said the binges are getting shorter. I have changed some stuff about my drinking = and I still go to meetings and die for a cup of hope. thanks for caring you all. It helps to know I can come here and admit my faults and move on. and you don't hate me or shun me for it. thank you.
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In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic.

"Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her.
—James Barrie


Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum
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Old 08-25-2012, 11:13 AM   #248
Clodfobble
UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
 
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Do you think the extended family time played a role in triggering it? I'm glad you pulled yourself out again, nevermind whether it was for lack of money or bootstraps or whatever the reason. We do love you and will be here.
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Old 08-25-2012, 12:03 PM   #249
Trilby
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Clodfobble View Post
Do you think the extended family time played a role in triggering it? I'm glad you pulled yourself out again, nevermind whether it was for lack of money or bootstraps or whatever the reason. We do love you and will be here.
thank you. Now I'm tearing up!

I think being in constant contact with my mom and dad for the past month or so has def. played it's part but ultimately I am the one who is responsible. I did it. I drank it. No one held a gun to my head (except myself maybe). My mom must call me 20-40 times a day and my dad hates me so much he's betting he outlives me. Not a great atmosphere. I"ve asked the sisters to help - one of them is now among the unemployed so she's available, but they just won't help out for whatever reason.

I hate feeling this way.

You guys make it better. After the meeting I hope I'll feel more like "me" than I do now.
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In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic.

"Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her.
—James Barrie


Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum
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Old 08-25-2012, 12:22 PM   #250
limey
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Oh, now, don't cry! But Clod's suggestion can perhaps be helpful if it makes you more aware that that is a risk factor ... Hoping you feel better soon x
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Old 08-25-2012, 01:11 PM   #251
DanaC
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*hugs*
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Old 08-25-2012, 04:26 PM   #252
Stormieweather
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((((((((((Bri))))))))))

The important thing is, you stopped. Hang in there!
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Old 08-25-2012, 04:35 PM   #253
Pico and ME
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Clodfobble View Post
Do you think the extended family time played a role in triggering it? I'm glad you pulled yourself out again, nevermind whether it was for lack of money or bootstraps or whatever the reason. We do love you and will be here.
That would do it for me!
Why is family such a horrendously hurtful force for some of us? Im glad it was a shorter episode for you Bri. You prolly went thru a mega amount of emotional stress.
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Old 08-26-2012, 01:36 AM   #254
classicman
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Quote:
I"ve asked the sisters to help - one of them is now among the unemployed so she's available, but they just won't help out for whatever reason.
When my ex quit she didn't see/talk/communicate with her parents for almost a year.
No B-days, holidays ... ZERO.
She credits that with her continued sobriety. Her parents were fucked up too. Manipulative beyond belief.
Maybe your sisters have issues with them as well and thats why they don't help you. They are too busy helping themselves stay out of the trap you are in. Hang in there.
(talking out my ass here)
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Old 08-26-2012, 05:18 AM   #255
Trilby
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No - not talking out your ass. It's really closer to the truth. THEY have escaped the vortex that is J&J (my 'rents). One is their "good girl" favorite who always, always did everything right (and I love her very much; she's my huge support person and i love her) and the other smokes so much weed she qualifies for Jamaican citizenship and just doesn't give a care.**


**'splain "so much weed" - when I was with her up in Maine she lit up about every twenty minutes. That's a lot of weed smokin' right there.
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In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic.

"Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her.
—James Barrie


Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum
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