Taking the kids to the bar

[Undertoad]

There were no banjos, anon said they were musicians.

[xoxoxoBruce]

Steve Martin's gonna kick your ass.

[Undertoad]

Then my ass will be kicked by an outstanding actor, writer and comic!

[Gravdigr]

Originally Posted by monster

At least bars aren't smoky anymore. Well not here, any way. Are they still in other places?

Smoky bars are still a thing here in good ol' KY. Just about the only place smokers can smoke, besides home, and the car...

[Aliantha]

I think it depends on the venue. Our local pub is very family oriented. Being a small town, a lot of the local community events are hosted there, like fishing club socials and weigh ins, special holidays like Australia and Anzac day. They put on jumping castles etc for the kids, and mostly everyone with kids hangs outside where there's a fenced playground for the kids. Yes there's drinking, and some people get shitfaced, but mostly it's a family environment and kids are welcome. There's a restaurant there too, and we sometimes go there on the weekend, but I wouldn't want my little ones in the public bar on a Friday night after 8.30 pm or so. I don't want anyone else's little kids in there running amok either. Pubs at night time are really no place for kids after dinner hour is over imo.

[sexobon]

IAW anon, the children were taken to the bar to listen to bluegrass music. You don't say anything about there being bluegrass music at your venue. Are your community's children being neglected?

[Sundae]

In Australia, blue grass is probably poisonous.

[Aliantha]

Blue grass is usually referring to cooch grass. Haha
Plenty of country music fans in this town too btw. Often the entertainment is country music in one form or another. I don't really care what kind of music it is. As long as it's good, and as long as it's joyful. Nothing worse than a live act that looks dead.

[glatt]

I'm a little late to this thread, but my wife and I have taken our kids to bars to listen to music on a few occasions. We've taken them to see their uncle's band a few times, and also to see one or two other bands that we have been following. Really fun music that is for all ages, but our kids were the youngest ones there. We've been generally well received. My daughter was invited on stage to dance at one of her uncle's shows. And at another band's show, I brought my son up close to the band to watch and dance, and the other patrons were smiling and nodding to us.

We generally only go to early shows that start at 7 or 8 and we leave around 9-10. We bring wax ear plugs for them. We don't drink in the bar ourselves. The focus is absolutely the music and we interact only with one another, not with the other patrons. If the situation got a little out of control with others, we would leave. I think we didn't ever do this before they were 8 or 9 years old or so. Probably not until after age 10. I can't really remember.

So I don't necessarily have any problems with taking kids to a bar, but it depends on what happens while they are there. And I absolutely would not do it if there was any sort of custody issue. That's just stupid, because it doesn't sound good. "Yes, Your Honor, I took my kids to a bar."

At one club, I got the vibe that it was fine to be there early in the night, but that if we hadn't left when we did, it would not have been a good place for kids. Lots of young people who had consumed a drink or two. But the booze hadn't kicked in yet. You knew it was coming though. So we left while it was all still good.

[it]

If you don't mind the nitpicking, since it's something I've researched relatively recently:

Originally Posted by anonymous

In more progressive states the courts are seeing 50-50 joint custody as being in the best interests of the kids.

People often mistake the meaning of "joint custody" to mean 50/50. The most common practice in virtually all states within the US is joint legal custody & primary caregiver physical custody, which usually means it's still around 5 days mom 2 days dad, or even every other week arrangements.

The research on the matter suggests the best interest of the kids is joint physical custody - the one where both parents have 50% of the time with the children (or within the range of 40-60%), who do suffer in well being initially but at later ages are almost on pair in all measurements with children of non divorced parents. Joint legal custody alone provides little to no testable benefits on the child's well being when compared to visitation rights (Both of which have both parents spending more or less the same amount of time with the child).

(I realize all of this is besides the point, which I have little to no opinion about because a bar can mean anything from an almost-stripclub with loud eardrum tearing music and college kids doing belly button shots to a nice family friendly restaurant that also has alcohol... So go on, nothing to see here).

[anonymous]

@ Traceur

Yep. I meant joint physical custody.

And while this isn't a stripper bar, the music is always deafening, it is decidedly NOT a family bar. They serve cheap beer and hard liquor and the occasional glass of wine. They don't even have peanuts.

As to its suitability, I've been there a few times and somewhat felt the need to watch my back.

On the spectrum of bars I would say it is one quarter of the way to being halfway wholesome. What is that? An eighth?

[Gravdigr]

Originally Posted by anonymous

What is that? An eighth?

About $20-$25.

Wait. Whut? Oh, I thought you were talking about weed.

[footfootfoot]

He did say "joint" physical custody

[it]

Originally Posted by anonymous

@ Traceur

Yep. I meant joint physical custody.

And while this isn't a stripper bar, the music is always deafening, it is decidedly NOT a family bar. They serve cheap beer and hard liquor and the occasional glass of wine. They don't even have peanuts.

As to its suitability, I've been there a few times and somewhat felt the need to watch my back.

On the spectrum of bars I would say it is one quarter of the way to being halfway wholesome. What is that? An eighth?

Huh.

I remember once going into a bar like that with my son because it was the only public place around and he was in a bathroom related state of emergency. I felt more guarded then serving in the freaking 2nd Israeli-Lebanon war. I was terrified at what might happen. With my mind alerting itself to scenario's ranging from a gang of human traffickers to a prostitute deciding to practice her career exit plans as a tattoo artist. I can't imagine being able to relax as a parent in a situation like that.

[classicman]

No, just fucking no. you can't go hang out at a bar with your kids. WTF??? How is this even possibly beneficial to the kids. This is nothing but these two women showing they are more interested in selfishly doing what THEY want over whats best for their kids. Shouldn't have had them.

Dad: So honey, how was your time with Mom?
Kid: great.
Dad: What did you do?
Kid: went to a bar and hung out at the table while mom and her friend groped errr socialized with some musicians and ex cons.
Dad: Hello Mr Lawyer ...