Funny/Embarrassing things they say - Page 37

ZenGum · 07-16-2010, 06:41 AM

Now that would make for an interesting game!

Clodfobble · 08-11-2010, 07:26 PM

From the daughter of some friends of ours:

Girl: Did you know that the ocean is 100 feet deep?!
Mr. Clod: Really? All of it?
Girl: Huh?
Mr. Clod: Is that the deepest it goes, or are just some parts 100 feet deep?
Girl: Well... the part in the back.

Lamplighter · 08-15-2010, 10:33 PM

As we were driving my 6-yr old G-daughter said: "That was a female tree"
I naively asked "What do you mean ? How do you know ?"
She said: "Because it didn't have any peanuts"

squirell nutkin · 09-05-2010, 11:16 AM

We have another woodchuck this year who is too wary to get into the trap, so I borrowed a friend's rifle to shoot him. The inch is very excited about killing the woodchuck as is his 3 yo sister, the mm. He wants to eat it when we shoot it and make woodchuck burgers. So there has been a lot of talk about eating "The Fatbody" their nickname for the woodchuck.

Yesterday the mm was talking on the phone to her grandma and said, "Daddy didn't kill the Fatbody so he's making pizza instead."

I'm sure grandma had absolutley no idea WTF the mm was talking about but said, "That's nice."

monster · 09-08-2010, 07:56 PM

Here's a twofer ...or maybe a threefer....

Yesterday i sent thor to get the Wheelie Bin/trash can from the kerb/curb, and he said "oh dear, it looks like the lid has become disisolated"! I love the sound of malaprop in the morning

Then this afternoon they were watching some cartoon crap or other and I heard something about a Humongous Whore.

Turns out it was a Humungosaur ... then once we'd established that (and Hebe maybe got what i thought I'd heard), the creature exclaimed "oh no, my ball fell off!" at which point all three kids lost it, closely followed by their mother.

Should I lose my mom card for this?

SteveDallas · 09-11-2010, 03:22 PM

"Why did you tear [the bottom of the sheet from school] off?"

"You're just supposed to sign the bottom part."

"Am I supposed to read the top part?"

"Naaah you don't need to."

"Uhhhh.. yeah, right.... bring it here..."

Clodfobble · 09-11-2010, 04:05 PM

And what did the top part say??

Tulip · 09-11-2010, 05:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble

And what did the top part say??

Yeah, I'm curious too.

monster · 09-11-2010, 05:36 PM

/I misread that as pop tart/

SteveDallas · 09-11-2010, 05:36 PM

Oh, it was just a generic "Hi, I'm the PE teacher, here's what we're doing this year, you have to be dressed appropriately for PE, you need a doctor's note to be excused, blah blah blah." Nothing that interesting--sorry!

SteveDallas · 09-11-2010, 05:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monster

/I misread that as pop tart/

It said, "You want empty calories... lots of em.... yummmmm just look at that cherry frosting!"

monster · 09-11-2010, 06:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SteveDallas

It said, "You want empty calories... lots of em.... yummmmm just look at that cherry frosting!"

Hmm Pop tart letters home here read more like :no spaghetti straps, shorts must go past the fingertips, no obscene words on clothing....

casimendocina · 09-12-2010, 07:00 AM

Not a parent thing, but it was funny. We've been watching a documentary about the history of European settlement in Australia. The second episode dealt with Tasmania. Apparently, the whalers and sealers who came to the coast of Tassie were a particularly noxious bunch and kidnapped Aboriginal women for nefarious purposes. Anyway, I'd stopped the DVD just to check that everyone was clear what a whaler and a sealer was as it was fairly key. i.e. Trugannini, the apparently last full blood Tasmanian Aborigine saw her husband to be tossed overboard by these men and then witnessed his hands being cut off so that he would be unable to climb back into the boat. The fact that she negotiated with the British is attributed to seeing not only her fiancee, but also various other members of her family die violently. Anyway, that's preamble...we watched the DVD and the next class, I was checking how much had been retained, so I asked "what was the job of a sealer?" expecting the answer of "to catch seals". The answer that I got was "to take the women." Not sure whether to

OR

xoxoxoBruce · 09-12-2010, 04:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SteveDallas

Oh, it was just a generic "Hi, I'm the PE teacher, here's what we're doing this year, you have to be dressed appropriately for PE, you need a doctor's note to be excused, blah blah blah." Nothing that interesting--sorry!

That's called conditioning. After a couple, you won't bother to ask, then they'll have you. But don't worry, it only works with normal people.

Flint · 09-17-2010, 09:45 AM

Pooka told the girl (4yo) she looks cute, and the reply was, "That's what she said."

07-16-2010, 06:41 AM	#541
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	Now that would make for an interesting game! __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

08-11-2010, 07:26 PM	#542
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	From the daughter of some friends of ours: Girl: Did you know that the ocean is 100 feet deep?! Mr. Clod: Really? All of it? Girl: Huh? Mr. Clod: Is that the deepest it goes, or are just some parts 100 feet deep? Girl: Well... the part in the back. __________________ My book My other book My spirit animal

09-05-2010, 11:16 AM	#544
squirell nutkin has a second hand user title Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: in a Nut House Posts: 2,017	We have another woodchuck this year who is too wary to get into the trap, so I borrowed a friend's rifle to shoot him. The inch is very excited about killing the woodchuck as is his 3 yo sister, the mm. He wants to eat it when we shoot it and make woodchuck burgers. So there has been a lot of talk about eating "The Fatbody" their nickname for the woodchuck. Yesterday the mm was talking on the phone to her grandma and said, "Daddy didn't kill the Fatbody so he's making pizza instead." I'm sure grandma had absolutley no idea WTF the mm was talking about but said, "That's nice." __________________ And now I'm finished posting.

09-08-2010, 07:56 PM	#545
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	Here's a twofer ...or maybe a threefer.... Yesterday i sent thor to get the Wheelie Bin/trash can from the kerb/curb, and he said "oh dear, it looks like the lid has become disisolated"! I love the sound of malaprop in the morning Then this afternoon they were watching some cartoon crap or other and I heard something about a Humongous Whore. Turns out it was a Humungosaur ... then once we'd established that (and Hebe maybe got what i thought I'd heard), the creature exclaimed "oh no, my ball fell off!" at which point all three kids lost it, closely followed by their mother. Should I lose my mom card for this? __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

09-11-2010, 04:05 PM	#547
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	And what did the top part say?? __________________ My book My other book My spirit animal

08-15-2010, 10:33 PM	#543
Lamplighter Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Bottom lands of the Missoula floods Posts: 6,402	As we were driving my 6-yr old G-daughter said: "That was a female tree" I naively asked "What do you mean ? How do you know ?" She said: "Because it didn't have any peanuts"

09-11-2010, 03:22 PM	#546
SteveDallas Your Bartender Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Philly Burbs, PA Posts: 7,651	"Why did you tear [the bottom of the sheet from school] off?" "You're just supposed to sign the bottom part." "Am I supposed to read the top part?" "Naaah you don't need to." "Uhhhh.. yeah, right.... bring it here..."

09-11-2010, 05:36 PM	#549
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	/I misread that as pop tart/ __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

09-11-2010, 05:36 PM	#550
SteveDallas Your Bartender Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Philly Burbs, PA Posts: 7,651	Oh, it was just a generic "Hi, I'm the PE teacher, here's what we're doing this year, you have to be dressed appropriately for PE, you need a doctor's note to be excused, blah blah blah." Nothing that interesting--sorry!

09-12-2010, 07:00 AM	#553
casimendocina Professor Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 1,622	Not a parent thing, but it was funny. We've been watching a documentary about the history of European settlement in Australia. The second episode dealt with Tasmania. Apparently, the whalers and sealers who came to the coast of Tassie were a particularly noxious bunch and kidnapped Aboriginal women for nefarious purposes. Anyway, I'd stopped the DVD just to check that everyone was clear what a whaler and a sealer was as it was fairly key. i.e. Trugannini, the apparently last full blood Tasmanian Aborigine saw her husband to be tossed overboard by these men and then witnessed his hands being cut off so that he would be unable to climb back into the boat. The fact that she negotiated with the British is attributed to seeing not only her fiancee, but also various other members of her family die violently. Anyway, that's preamble...we watched the DVD and the next class, I was checking how much had been retained, so I asked "what was the job of a sealer?" expecting the answer of "to catch seals". The answer that I got was "to take the women." Not sure whether to OR

09-17-2010, 09:45 AM	#555
Flint Snowflake Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Dystopia Posts: 13,136	Pooka told the girl (4yo) she looks cute, and the reply was, "That's what she said." __________________ **************** There's a level of facility that everyone needs to accomplish, and from there it's a matter of deciding for yourself how important ultra-facility is to your expression. ... I found, like Joseph Campbell said, if you just follow whatever gives you a little joy or excitement or awe, then you're on the right track. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Terry Bozzio**

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