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Old 08-25-2009, 11:36 PM   #1
xoxoxoBruce
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Aug 26, 2009: Cockney ATM

Of course ATM machines around the world use the local language...
...except in the USA where you have to press 1 for the local language.

This ATM uses Cockney.



Quote:
Bank Machine, which runs 2,500 ATMs across the country, was aiming to amuse, but it has grander ambitions too. It hopes to follow the Cockney cash machines with Brummie, Geordie, Scouse and Scots ATMs. It hopes that ATMs will serve to keep these dialects alive in Britain.
Some were amused, but not all.

Quote:
But John Strachan, 52, an IT worker from Dundee, found the experience troubling. When it offered to serve him in English or Cockney, he suspected a hoax. He selected Cockney.

“Readin’ your bladder of lard”, read the message on the screen. It asked for his “Huckleberry Finn”. Then more bewildering questions: did he wanted to see his balance on the Charlie Sheen? Did he wish to change his Huckleberry Finn or did he simply require sausage and mash, with or without a receipt?

After the concept was explained to him, he was so indignant that he resorted to slang himself: “It’s complete pants,” he said. “Using an ATM is a very sensitive moment.”
Yeah Bank Machine, don't mess with a guy's sensitive moments.

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Old 08-26-2009, 12:01 AM   #2
ZenGum
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"Sausage and Mash"???

Surely it is Bangers and Mash.



Mind you, when I saw "Cockney ATM", my filthy little mind went somewhere different.
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Old 08-26-2009, 08:11 AM   #3
ats
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There are some photos on the DNA Lounge site of their customised ATM with a bunch of industrial-music-themed messages. Apparently some customers get a bit antsy about an ATM displaying the banner "SURPRISE, SURPRISE: THE GOVERNMENT LIES"...
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Old 08-26-2009, 09:11 AM   #4
birdclaw
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So I hate to be "that guy" but I need a translator. Balance on Fleet Street? Written in blood?
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Old 08-26-2009, 09:16 AM   #5
monster
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no translation is possible. That's not true cockney slang. great idea but very disappointing. very poorly executed. i've a good mind to get on the dog about this pony.
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Old 08-26-2009, 10:30 AM   #6
xoxoxoBruce
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Quote:
There seemed to be a scarcity of real Cockneys in Spitalfields to communicate with the cash machine in their mother tongue.

Farther east, however, next to the Cockney cash machine in Hackney, Roy Parker, 62, a bona fide Cockney, was working behind the counter of a mini-cab firm. So, what did he think of the ATM outside?

“Real Cockneys don’t have bank accounts or all that palava,” he said. “They put it under the mattress.”
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Old 08-26-2009, 01:16 PM   #7
limey
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Cab drivers have their accounts in Switzerland, I believe ...
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Old 08-26-2009, 04:02 PM   #8
Gravdigr
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Get your money from a machine??? An A.T. wha??? This'll never catch on...
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