Unexpected Challenges of House Sitting

[wolf]

I am pet sitting for a friend, solarhippie (she has a Prius and put solar panels on the house last year). She wanted to go camping, I couldn't go on the trip because I had some other pre-scheduled events already this weekend, and so, here I am, watching two dogs and two cats.

They are all pretty easy to deal with. Cats, after all, are furniture, not pets. They feel all comfy and they make you happy and all, but the sofa doesn't come when you call it either.

The dogs are pretty good ... a beagle mix (who is old and deaf) and a Husky mix. Their human has arranged the house to their benefit, and actually, you can just let them out in the yard and they're good ... there's lots of water bowls out there (I've counted 5 outside and at least three inside), and they have access to a screened in porch in case it rains or is chillier than they like, not that we're having a lot of chilly lately!

So, what could be challenging about this?

One of the cats is an indoor-outdoor cat. He wanders around the neighborhood, kills birds, and eats their hearts, leaving the rest behind.

He has some issues.

I have to give him Prozac every morning.

He does not like being given Prozac, but apparently if he doesn't get it, he pees on mommy's bed. And couch. And pillows. And in all the corners.

So, he gets his Prozac Saturday morning and gives me really evil look, and demands egress. I figure he's earned it. A semi-stranger just grabbed him by the scruff, shoved a tube down his throat, and blew a small, hard object down his throat.

Out he goes. Last I saw of him. Frequently go to the door, call his name, hope he'll show up, check the doghouse and the screenporch in case he's out there waiting to come in, no go. solarhippie was pretty calm about it ... "did you see his body on the street outside the house? No? Well, he's probably okay then, and if not he's had a good life."

Wow. I wouldn't be so calm about that. Maybe she's gone through a lot of cats?

The second cat tries to go outside too, but she's the indoor cat.

Each time I chase her outside and follow her around the yard until I can grab her and bring her back inside. I explained to her I've already lost one cat, so I have to keep good track of the remaining one.

Actually, he did show up, finally, this morning. He got his Prozac and is confined to quarters. Solarhippie's orders. Fireworks tonight will freak him out. He's hissed at me a couple of times already about this.

Okay, so that's like not enough, right?

Just before this whole thing started, solarhippie bought a new window air conditioner for the room where I am sleeping. The house has central air, but it doesn't do a whole lot to cool the upstairs of the house.

The new unit is lovely.

I helped to put it in.

I have no skills in this regard. I have lived in apartments for most of my life. Maintenance and installations are things that other people do on my behalf.

The unit has somehow managed to vibrate itself forward ... into the room. Jumped the lip on the sill that's supposed to hold it in place. So, if it falls, it should fall in rather than out to the back yard. Solarhippie is informed of this. She figures it can be dealt with after she gets back tomorrow.

So, like that isn't enough ...

I'm sitting here in the kitchen, having some coffee, surfing the web a bit and this ungodly sound starts up.

WTF? Reminds me of an air-raid siren. Or the tornado warning sirens from when I was a kid ... why would they have something like that ...

OH FUCK. I AM LESS THAN TWO MILES AWAY FROM A FUCKING NUCLEAR PLANT THIS CAN'T BE GOOD. IT'S INDEPENDENCE DAY, GREAT DAY FOR A JIHAD. I AM SO SCREWED. WHAT DIRECTION IS THE WIND COMING FROM?

Nothing on the news, no emergency broadcast system break-through, nothing on my pager or on the county alert system ...

Oh. Monthly test on the first Monday. okay. hopefully the heart rate will come down soon.

solarhippie will be back tomorrow night.

[footfootfoot]

Here's a virtual Gin and Tonic, Bombay Saphire ok with you?

You haven't got time for kitty's prozac to kick in to be at all helpful. The G&T takes effect almost instantly.

Rx
CST ad. lib.

[Sundae]

Wow - cat Prozac?
My Prozac made me suicidal - maybe that's why Solarhippie watches the roads.

Cat Ecstacy though - it'd be worth the trip to the dark side of town to get my boy on that.
He doesn't need to be any more hyper, but my life would be 53% easier if he only loved up the Mia-cat instead of being such a bully. It would be worth technically poisoning his system just to not have cat-shifts and have him have some cat warmth and comfort instead of always having to come to me. I don't mind so much - although the 04.00 wake-ups are tiresome - but his own life would be so much better if he only let in the love.

Don't worry Wolf. The 'rents housesit professionally, and it's for for minor ducats. They've had to deal with death and disease, vet trips and fox slaughter. AND Mum feels obliged to clean the house top to toe, even in houses that have cleaners (the majority of them) and buy milk & bread for people who earn 5-10x what she did when she retired.

It's a weary job.

[wolf]

Which is why I do it casually for friends, rather than trying to develop a business at it.

Although I have been thinking about putting up an ad in the mail room ... "Need your dog walked, I need to walk, might as well have you pay me to do it ..."

I'm not that desperate yet, though.

[skysidhe]

Originally Posted by wolf

Which is why I do it casually for friends, rather than trying to develop a business at it.

Although I have been thinking about putting up an ad in the mail room ... "Need your dog walked, I need to walk, might as well have you pay me to do it ..."

I'm not that desperate yet, though.

I like this idea. Sounds like fun.

Happy 4th!

[ZenGum]

Just deal with Outside Cat as you would deal with any mentally ill patient who has been missing their meds.

Step 1. Takedown gloves.

[wolf]

Originally Posted by ZenGum

Just deal with Outside Cat as you would deal with any mentally ill patient who has been missing their meds.

Step 1. Takedown gloves.

Largedog and mediumsizeddog just watched fireworks with me in the back yard ... from my lap. I was able to peek around largedog's chest to see the display.

[casimendocina]

Originally Posted by wolf

Largedog and mediumsizeddog just watched fireworks with me in the back yard ... from my lap. I was able to peek around largedog's chest to see the display.

If you crushed up the Prozac and put it in the food, would Outside Cat be fooled? There's no way he could eat around it and it's unlikely if he's hungry that he'll refuse the food. (Tried and tested).

[infinite monkey]

Originally Posted by wolf

Which is why I do it casually for friends, rather than trying to develop a business at it.

Although I have been thinking about putting up an ad in the mail room ... "Need your dog walked, I need to walk, might as well have you pay me to do it ..."

I'm not that desperate yet, though.

I was commisserating with a cow orker, and I said I'd love to have a job I loved...you know, the american dream, but I can't make any money being a dogwalker.

Turns out you can, in a big city.

BUT, then I heard that there is money to be made in the pooping scooping, from old folks who can't get out and clean up their yards but love their little ankle nippers. I could totally do that.

Mom said I would need a commercial, my theme song would be Poop Scoop Boogie.

[wolf]

Originally Posted by casimendocina

If you crushed up the Prozac and put it in the food, would Outside Cat be fooled? There's no way he could eat around it and it's unlikely if he's hungry that he'll refuse the food. (Tried and tested).

Multi cat household, the other cat is friendly and calm and doesn't need the Prozac. To specifically target outsidecat, I would have to put the Prozac inside of the little birdies' hearts.

[Beest]

A couple of weeks ago while Hector was slogging to finish some project one evening we had a 'cat whisperer' type program on in the background.
People with problem cats call this guy and he comes round and advises them on changes in lifestyle. Part of the show was that this guy was alsoa musician, weighed ~250 lbs, bald head, goatee, tattoos etc. so lots of shock value when people open the door to 'the cat guy'.

Anyway, letting several episodes run back to back his solution in each case was basically the same, cat's need a 3D enviromnet, lot's opportunites to climb on shelves or on top of TV's etc. mostly so they can be higher up and look down on everything else (for those of us who have read the Unalderated cat, cats need to play cat chess and win).
In each house he would advise them on clearing shleves and adding climbing toys so that a cat could navigate around a room without touching the floor.

[classicman]

Cats need to learn the pecking order ....

Humans
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Cats

[Clodfobble]

Originally Posted by infinite monkey

BUT, then I heard that there is money to be made in the pooping scooping, from old folks who can't get out and clean up their yards but love their little ankle nippers. I could totally do that.

There are several businesses who do that here. They market themselves just like lawn mowing companies. It's not just the old folks who use them; no one likes picking up poop.

[Pete Zicato]

Originally Posted by infinite monkey

Mom said I would need a commercial, my theme song would be Poop Scoop Boogie.

You could call your company Mine Sweeper.

[infinite monkey]

Excellent!