The Cellar  

Go Back   The Cellar > Main > Relationships

Relationships People who need people; or, why can't we all just get along?

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 01-02-2017, 07:51 PM   #31
glatt
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 25,013
I'm torn. I think planning ahead is smart and pragmatic. You may get to the point where you are physically incapable of doing it and strongly desire to do it with nobody willing to help you. But Bruce is right. If you plan for defeat, then that's self fulfilling.
glatt is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-02-2017, 07:55 PM   #32
Pico and ME
Are you knock-kneed?
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Middle Hoosierland
Posts: 3,479
I don't dwell on the dying. I don't feel close to being sick yet (just still recovering from abdominal surgery) and I have a lot of plans to keep me going. Mostly, I'm still the happy, optomistic (even if with a fatalistic bent) gal I usually am. The less I talk about it the better I am. I was just sorta under the influence yesterday.
__________________
Jesse LaGreca in 2012

“Seven Deadly Sins: Wealth without work, Pleasure without conscience, Science without humanity, Knowledge without character, Politics without principle, Commerce without morality, Worship without sacrifice.” – Mahatma Gandhi
Pico and ME is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-02-2017, 10:19 PM   #33
Pico and ME
Are you knock-kneed?
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Middle Hoosierland
Posts: 3,479
Also, all these warnings about self-fulfilling prophecies are sweet of you all, but kinda irritating. I'm not going to live like I'm gonna die...except for maybe taking some bucket list trips, but I would like to have some foreknowledge so that I can take those trips in good health, or not blow my stash taking them, and then surviving for 20 more years with no retirement money. However, its info Im not gonna get.

Its nerve-wracking. You have no effin idea how nerve-wracking it is.
__________________
Jesse LaGreca in 2012

“Seven Deadly Sins: Wealth without work, Pleasure without conscience, Science without humanity, Knowledge without character, Politics without principle, Commerce without morality, Worship without sacrifice.” – Mahatma Gandhi
Pico and ME is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-03-2017, 06:19 AM   #34
lumberjim
barely a vapor
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 23,392
Have the time of your life right now. Always.
__________________
and so it goes
lumberjim is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-03-2017, 01:42 PM   #35
xoxoxoBruce
The future is unwritten
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 57,578
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pico and ME View Post
Also, all these warnings about self-fulfilling prophecies are sweet of you all, but kinda irritating.
OK, but one thing has become clear over the years, is that surviving serious illness is at least 50% mental.
__________________
Everything is interesting... look closer.
xoxoxoBruce is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-03-2017, 02:11 PM   #36
Pico and ME
Are you knock-kneed?
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Middle Hoosierland
Posts: 3,479
OK, Bruce.....

So I have gotten my self trapped in a lot of negative self talk.

What do you all do to get unstuck?
__________________
Jesse LaGreca in 2012

“Seven Deadly Sins: Wealth without work, Pleasure without conscience, Science without humanity, Knowledge without character, Politics without principle, Commerce without morality, Worship without sacrifice.” – Mahatma Gandhi
Pico and ME is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-03-2017, 02:20 PM   #37
Gravdigr
The Un-Tuckian
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 27,772
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pico and ME View Post
I'm not going to live like I'm gonna die...
He said
♪ ♫"I went skydiving♪ ♫
♪ ♫I went Rocky Mountain climbing♪ ♫
♪ ♫I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named Fumanchu♪ ♫
♪ ♫And I loved deeper♪ ♫
♪ ♫And I spoke sweeter♪ ♫
♪ ♫And I gave forgiveness I'd been denying"♪ ♫
♪ ♫And he said♪ ♫
♪ ♫"Someday I hope you get the chance♪ ♫
♪ ♫To live like you were dying"♪ ♫
__________________


These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.[/i]
Gravdigr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-03-2017, 02:23 PM   #38
Pico and ME
Are you knock-kneed?
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Middle Hoosierland
Posts: 3,479
__________________
Jesse LaGreca in 2012

“Seven Deadly Sins: Wealth without work, Pleasure without conscience, Science without humanity, Knowledge without character, Politics without principle, Commerce without morality, Worship without sacrifice.” – Mahatma Gandhi
Pico and ME is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-03-2017, 02:28 PM   #39
xoxoxoBruce
The future is unwritten
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 57,578
Exactly, stop thinking and start doing, so you're to busy for maudlin thoughts. Keep looking forward to fun things and the time will pass quickly.
__________________
Everything is interesting... look closer.
xoxoxoBruce is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-03-2017, 07:18 PM   #40
lumberjim
barely a vapor
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 23,392
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pico and ME View Post
OK, Bruce.....

So I have gotten my self trapped in a lot of negative self talk.

What do you all do to get unstuck?
When you realize it's happening, reduce your focus to the immediate present moment. pay attention to your breathing, your fingertips, your surrounding view. try NOT to think. just be. it's not easy...

be a cat waiting at the mousehole for the mouse to come out. empty your mind. do it for 5 minutes. stay out of the past... and for you, especially, the future. Be where you are and when you are right in that moment. Be as present in the moment as you are able to be, so your attention leaves the dread you feel about the future.

You will need to plan for your future, but DO NOT try to live there in your mind. Stay in your body. Your body is the thinker. not the thoughts.
__________________
and so it goes
lumberjim is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-03-2017, 10:29 PM   #41
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 23,746
I've found it helpful to realize that the thoughts that I don't like, like the ones you're describing aren't wrong or bad or immoral or signs of weakness or any shit like that. I can't prove it, but I can say with complete confidence that every single person here has on more than one occasion had thoughts that were completely awful, about themselves or about someone else. Thoughts, *thoughts* mind you, that had they been turned into actions would be crimes, atrocities, horrors. But sitting there buzzing around your head (and my head, etc.), they're just thoughts.

They might stink. They might be scary, or heavy, or shocking. They're just thoughts and remember, *everyone* has had similar experiences. Jim's absolutely onto something when he says you're the thinker, not the thoughts. They might be shit, but like shit, they'll pass.

Then you have different thoughts. Things feel better, your head and heart feel better. But please don't make the mistake of compounding the awfulness of terrible thoughts by believing they somehow reflect on you as a person, or your ability, or your future.
__________________
Remember:

Live a good life. If there are gods and they are just, they will not care how devout you have been, but will welcome you based on the virtues you have lived by. If there are gods, but unjust, then you should not want to worship them. If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones. -- Marcus Aurelius, philosopher and writer (121-180)
BigV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-04-2017, 01:50 PM   #42
Gravdigr
The Un-Tuckian
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 27,772
Quote:
Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce View Post
...and the time will pass quickly.
Uh, perhaps not the best choice of words in this situation.

__________________


These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.[/i]
Gravdigr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-04-2017, 02:31 PM   #43
glatt
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 25,013
Yeah, she should move to Lewiston, ME where I grew up, because every day there is like a freakin' eternity.
glatt is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-04-2017, 06:20 PM   #44
Pico and ME
Are you knock-kneed?
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Middle Hoosierland
Posts: 3,479
You guys are funny....



Thanks for the suggestions LJ and V. Both are excellent...and will take some practice.

I think I will also pull out my Nordic track and set it up. Do a few minutes now and then. Tomorrow, I promise, Ill set it up tomorrow....
__________________
Jesse LaGreca in 2012

“Seven Deadly Sins: Wealth without work, Pleasure without conscience, Science without humanity, Knowledge without character, Politics without principle, Commerce without morality, Worship without sacrifice.” – Mahatma Gandhi
Pico and ME is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-04-2017, 06:22 PM   #45
Pico and ME
Are you knock-kneed?
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Middle Hoosierland
Posts: 3,479
Glatt, didn't Maine make weed legal? My state still hasn't OK'd medical yet, or if ever.
__________________
Jesse LaGreca in 2012

“Seven Deadly Sins: Wealth without work, Pleasure without conscience, Science without humanity, Knowledge without character, Politics without principle, Commerce without morality, Worship without sacrifice.” – Mahatma Gandhi
Pico and ME is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 05:38 PM.


Powered by: vBulletin Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.