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Old 01-10-2017, 01:39 PM   #5551
footfootfoot
MY TEMERITY REMAINS UNMITIGATED
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gravdigr View Post
Two matronly sisters lived together and managed a farm. For years both had an extreme fear of thunder storms and lightning.

One day one of the sisters was visiting a neighbor, and while walking home was caught in a severe thunder storm. Lightning was streaking across the sky and thunder was booming all around. Being totally terrified, she ran to a nearby haystack and buried her head in the hay like an ostrich, so she could not see the lightning or hear the thunder.

With her head buried in the hay, her rear end was exposed, and the wind blew her dress up exposing the long unused part of her anatomy.

Along comes the local stud, and seeing the poor souls predicament, he did the only thing a well endowed stud would do in such a situation. After fully satisfying himself he zipped his pants and went on his merry way.

Soon the sister pulled her head out of the haystack and rushed home, calling to her sister, "Sissy, Sissy, let me tell you something! If you ever get struck by lightning, you'll never be afraid again!!"
Umm, I don't get it. Being raped is worse than thunder and lightning?
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Old 01-10-2017, 02:24 PM   #5552
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Humor is difficult for you, isn't it?
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Old 01-10-2017, 04:30 PM   #5553
footfootfoot
MY TEMERITY REMAINS UNMITIGATED
 
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We all have our cross to bear.
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Old 01-10-2017, 05:52 PM   #5554
katfiche
like a fiche outta water
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Clodfobble View Post
That was THE joke when I was in high school. Like, it got told every day. And then we were told we had to stop, not because it was annoying, but because it was not a good idea to throw around the phrase "we don't serve your kind here."
Fortunately, 40 years ago we weren't burdened with second guessing our every utterance beyond intent.
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Old 01-10-2017, 08:30 PM   #5555
xoxoxoBruce
The future is unwritten
 
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45 years ago I have two mechanics working for me. The black mechanic stuck with me all the time, a good worker, and told me stories about being in the military and in Oregon he could buy a pair of shoes but couldn't try them on in the store. The white mechanic would sneak off at the slightest pretense to indulge his wood carving hobby.

One day The black mechanic and I were discussing the white mechanic, and I said he's a real nigger. The guys head spun around about three times then stopped and looked at me. Finally he said, well at least you know what it is. We were fast friends after that.
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Old 01-16-2017, 05:45 AM   #5556
xoxoxoBruce
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Black or whit, men will always be trying to figure out women.
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Old 01-16-2017, 03:13 PM   #5557
Gravdigr
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I have seen that situation exact.

With murdersickles, and car/truck/tractor/lawn mower engines...
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Old 02-05-2017, 01:22 PM   #5558
xoxoxoBruce
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This could be wishful thinking...
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Old 02-09-2017, 02:52 PM   #5559
xoxoxoBruce
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Oh yeah, ♪ If I could, I surely would ♫
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Old 02-12-2017, 12:07 PM   #5560
Giselle
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Quote:
Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce View Post
Oh yeah, ♪ If I could, I surely would ♫
Without humor, it is impossible to live!)) Very bad when a person has no sense of humor))
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Old 02-12-2017, 04:56 PM   #5561
xoxoxoBruce
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No sense of humor makes life a living hell.
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Old 02-15-2017, 04:27 PM   #5562
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Q: What's E.T. short for?















A: His legs aren't very long.


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Old 02-15-2017, 09:59 PM   #5563
captainhook455
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Q: what does a blonde think of?
A:

tarheel
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Old 02-16-2017, 01:42 PM   #5564
Gravdigr
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Wait.

WAIT.

WAIT.

They think?
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Old 02-18-2017, 04:52 PM   #5565
xoxoxoBruce
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true...
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