CyberBully - Page 4

lumberjim · 03-27-2009, 12:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pie

Will you two knock it off and get a room already?

why don't YOU shut yer Pie hole?

DanaC · 03-27-2009, 12:20 PM

Shawnee. I didn't and don't think you heartless. And yes I was being condescending, but with respect, it was in response to this condescension:

Quote:

Why was I never bullied? I suppose there are a lot of reasons: lack of qualified bulliers perhaps, but I also feel that I never put myself out there for that. I've said before I'm scarily fearless ('cept for spiders) and perhaps I've always carried myself in a way that precluded me seeming victimizable. It's also not that there weren't people in my childhood, or young adulthood, who didn't try to go there. They quickly gave up that effort when they saw I wasn't playing that game.

Again, it adds to the idea that people who get bullied are drawing the bully. I didn't play the game. I have never been a quiet victim.

DanaC · 03-27-2009, 12:24 PM

I might point out at this time that I have bullied as well. In my defense I considered had reason. Fuck with my friends and I can be unpleasant. And creative. Impulses and ways of interacting which I have long since trained myself out of. Except in politics, obviously.

jinx · 03-27-2009, 12:44 PM

I see that Shawnee is trying to understand why she wasn't bullied when others were, not that she's being condescending.
Bullying sucks and shouldn't be tolerated, but it is. A place of solace away from bullying is a good thing, but won't really solve the problem.

Shawnee123 · 03-27-2009, 12:44 PM

This thread has made me sad: sad that people are so cruel, sad that the world can be so cold. This is a feeling I've struggled against since I can remember remembering; I've never understood that about people.

Dana, I hope you know I have the utmost respect for you. I certainly don't think you ever "asked for it" and I am sorry to give that impression. My experience is totally different. Yes, I am proud of how strong I can be. Yes, I am constantly dismayed by my weakness.

Now give me some names and addresses so I can go kick some ass.

DanaC · 03-27-2009, 12:59 PM

*chuckles* Shawnee, I know that.

This isn't really about me. What I am, though, is a person you know, and as such I hope that some of the assumptions that get made when it's a stranger (like in that article) are avoided. The only thing that's annoyed me in this thread was the speed with which that girl and her family were labelled complicit in her victimisation. There is a culture (in my country and in yours I believe) of machismo when it comes to bullying. One is not supposed to 'lie down and take it', one is supposed to 'fight back. Those who become victims of bullying are perceived as weak. They must be weak, because they were the ones who got bullied.

It's pervasive. It feeds into every field in life. Whatever is overtly put into the culture in terms of telling someone if you're being bullied, and it's not your fault if you are being bullied; none of that outweighs the deep cultural identification of the bullied as weak and unworthy. Darwinism in action. This is how many people see it. That macho culture makes it very difficult for people to speak out.

Me? Oh I'll speak out. I am unbullyable. But only because I got innoculated young :P

classicman · 03-27-2009, 01:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DanaC

So come on. Hey Shaw, Classic and Jim: why don't you tell me now that I asked for it. Tell me, did I paint victim on my back? Was that me?

What the hell are you talking about? When did I EVER say anything remotely like that? I said that I thought the mother was being overly dramatic - does that count? I also ASKED how "girl bullying" was different. Fuckin A - looked for a little enlightenment and you, Pie and a couple others just "bully" me. great way to show YOUR empathy. Hypocrits, the lot of ya'

Then this beaut ...

Quote:

Originally Posted by DanaC

I might point out at this time that I have bullied as well.

So...this life altering aberration you described was something you felt compelled to inflict upon another human? Oh... YOU had reason. So that made it ok, i guess.

Personally what you all are talking about is way past bullying - its harassment. My definition of bullying would be more akin to what (no name) has been done here to certain posters...relatively harmless poking or mocking. I believe I even mentioned this in my 2nd post.

TheMercenary · 03-27-2009, 01:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by classicman

What the hell are you talking about? When did I EVER say anything remotely like that? I said that I thought the mother was being overly dramatic - does that count? I also ASKED how "girl bullying" was different. Fuckin A - looked for a little enlightenment and you, Pie and a couple others just "bully" me. great way to show YOUR empathy. Hypocrits, the lot of ya'

Then this beaut ...

So...this life altering aberration you described was something you felt compelled to inflict upon another human? Oh... YOU had reason. So that made it ok, i guess.

Personally what you all are talking about is way past bullying - its harassment. My definition of bullying would be more akin to what (no name) has been done here to certain posters...relatively harmless poking or mocking. I believe I even mentioned this in my 2nd post.

Cyber Bullies in the Cellar? No way.

classicman · 03-27-2009, 01:12 PM

Hey Merc - Go choke on yer popcorn or just STFU - mmmkay?

TheMercenary · 03-27-2009, 01:15 PM

**gagging**

Shawnee123 · 03-27-2009, 01:15 PM

c-man:

:

classicman · 03-27-2009, 01:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheMercenary

**gaging**

Gaging??? As in "Checking dimensional requirement by means of a gage."

I think you meant gagging and I hope it was on your popcorn. As you were. Oh and make sure you wash your hands before you touch the keyboard.

TheMercenary · 03-27-2009, 01:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by classicman

Gaging??? As in "Checking dimensional requirement by means of a gage."

I think you meant gagging and I hope it was on your popcorn. As you were. Oh and make sure you wash your hands before you touch the keyboard.

Yea that. Now join my "social club".

Sheldonrs · 03-27-2009, 01:29 PM

Bullied for most of my school life. Made me HATE school. Stopped going most of the time until college.
Most of the bullies were girls. It was that kind of town. I was taught to NEVER hit a girl. My father wasn't and I wasn't going to be him, no matter what. Bullies are the lowest form of life in school.

My only recompense, if I can call it that, albeit too late, was the fact that the 3 major trangressors did not fare too well. One was killed by her boyfriend. One had four kids, on welfare and no father in sight. The 3rd has been in and out of rehab and institutions since HS.

classicman · 03-27-2009, 01:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheMercenary

Yea that. Now join my "social club".

Fook you and your social shitclub - Its just something else to get bullied about. Kinda like being in the chess club or band or....

03-27-2009, 12:44 PM	#49
jinx Come on, cat. Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: general vicinity of Philadelphia area Posts: 7,013	I see that Shawnee is trying to understand why she wasn't bullied when others were, not that she's being condescending. Bullying sucks and shouldn't be tolerated, but it is. A place of solace away from bullying is a good thing, but won't really solve the problem. __________________ Crying won't help you, praying won't do you no good.

03-27-2009, 12:44 PM	#50
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	This thread has made me sad: sad that people are so cruel, sad that the world can be so cold. This is a feeling I've struggled against since I can remember remembering; I've never understood that about people. Dana, I hope you know I have the utmost respect for you. I certainly don't think you ever "asked for it" and I am sorry to give that impression. My experience is totally different. Yes, I am proud of how strong I can be. Yes, I am constantly dismayed by my weakness. Now give me some names and addresses so I can go kick some ass. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

03-27-2009, 01:12 PM	#54
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	Hey Merc - Go choke on yer popcorn or just STFU - mmmkay? __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

03-27-2009, 01:15 PM	#55
TheMercenary “Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo” Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Savannah, Georgia Posts: 21,393	gagging __________________ Anyone but the this most fuked up President in History in 2012! Last edited by TheMercenary; 03-27-2009 at 01:25 PM.

03-27-2009, 01:15 PM	#56
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	c-man: : __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

03-27-2009, 12:24 PM	#48
DanaC We have to go back, Kate! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 25,964	I might point out at this time that I have bullied as well. In my defense I considered had reason. Fuck with my friends and I can be unpleasant. And creative. Impulses and ways of interacting which I have long since trained myself out of. Except in politics, obviously.

03-27-2009, 12:59 PM	#51
DanaC We have to go back, Kate! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 25,964	chuckles Shawnee, I know that. This isn't really about me. What I am, though, is a person you know, and as such I hope that some of the assumptions that get made when it's a stranger (like in that article) are avoided. The only thing that's annoyed me in this thread was the speed with which that girl and her family were labelled complicit in her victimisation. There is a culture (in my country and in yours I believe) of machismo when it comes to bullying. One is not supposed to 'lie down and take it', one is supposed to 'fight back. Those who become victims of bullying are perceived as weak. They must be weak, because they were the ones who got bullied. It's pervasive. It feeds into every field in life. Whatever is overtly put into the culture in terms of telling someone if you're being bullied, and it's not your fault if you are being bullied; none of that outweighs the deep cultural identification of the bullied as weak and unworthy. Darwinism in action. This is how many people see it. That macho culture makes it very difficult for people to speak out. Me? Oh I'll speak out. I am unbullyable. But only because I got innoculated young :P

03-27-2009, 01:29 PM	#59
Sheldonrs Master Dwellar Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Los Angeles, CA Posts: 4,412	Bullied for most of my school life. Made me HATE school. Stopped going most of the time until college. Most of the bullies were girls. It was that kind of town. I was taught to NEVER hit a girl. My father wasn't and I wasn't going to be him, no matter what. Bullies are the lowest form of life in school. My only recompense, if I can call it that, albeit too late, was the fact that the 3 major trangressors did not fare too well. One was killed by her boyfriend. One had four kids, on welfare and no father in sight. The 3rd has been in and out of rehab and institutions since HS. __________________ Laugh and the world laughs with you; cry and the world laughs AT you.

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