The Cellar  

Go Back   The Cellar > Main > Home Base

Home Base A starting point, and place for threads don't seem to belong anywhere else

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 04-02-2020, 11:26 PM   #451
monster
I hear them call the tide
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Perpetual Chaos
Posts: 30,852
I believe they're doing that remotely too......
__________________
The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart
monster is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-30-2020, 06:12 PM   #452
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
Hello friends.

Here's an update.

As I posted previously, I have a contingent offer in hand, good for another 5 months. In the meantime, I have been tasked with completing two requests. Provide citizenship verification, which I have done. I turned the house inside out looking for my damn birth certificate and did not find it. Let me offer all of you the benefit of my experience here. If you need to communicate with some distant public health agency for a document like this, do not click on the top search result when you ask the Google to help you. That link will take you to a very official looking site, ask you all the right questions, take your money after you confirm you've read the Terms and Conditions, and send you an email indicating they'll send the one paper page of info you just input via the mail to the public health department in question. In this email, they're very clear that you already clicked the box that you understood the T&C and that a refund will not be forthcoming. At this point, I called the office in question, and the nice lady said *this* is the one we use, the only one, you can rely on them to convey the data you input to our office electronically and that they'll probably have it out the door within the hour. Here's what you need to know, the real site, the good site, it's not at the top of the search results, and it has a kind of funny spelling. Use this one:

https://www.vitalchek.com/

C H E K, got it?

Not vitalrec or vitalcheck or vitalrecordsonline or yourvitalrecords or vitalrecordscertificates or anything like that. Just the one in the link above. As a sanity check look for the name "A LexisNexis (R) Risk Solutions Company". One sixth the price, one hour (to the health dept) instead of mailing the paper to me to be mailed to the health department for six times the price.

My money and time, your lesson.

And complete the Questionnaire for National Security Positions Standard Form 86 (SF 86). This is a non-trivial form, the quick reference guide for which runs 44 pages. I have seven days to complete it. It is pretty exhaustive and I've taken four pages of notes just on the quick reference guide to know what to expect. I'm trying to avoid having the form open in one tab and using my computer and phone elsewhere to get the answer only to have the form tab timeout, or some other technical setback.

I have my notes, I'm going to flesh out what I know will be asked for (it's like an open book test, I'm getting my book well bookmarked before the test) so I can git-er done. Optimistically, the quick reference guide suggests that the public burden for this collection of information is estimated to be 150 minutes.

bwwaaaahahahahahahhaha!

I'll check in again in 150 minutes. Bye for now!
__________________
Be Just and Fear Not.
BigV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-07-2020, 09:18 PM   #453
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
149 minutes having elapsed, I'm here again.

*whew*

I've completed the 136 page form. I still need to resolve fourteen errors, then validate, sign, download, and submit, but that will all happen tonight. This just happens to be a natural stopping point and we just finished dinner.

OK!

See you all in one minute, right?
__________________
Be Just and Fear Not.
BigV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-07-2020, 10:27 PM   #454
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
TIME!



Quote:
Your Investigation Request has been released for processing. This completes the online portion of your submission.
Good night all!
__________________
Be Just and Fear Not.
BigV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-08-2020, 06:13 AM   #455
Griff
still says videotape
 
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 26,813
Good Lord what a PIA. Nobody has clearance in the Executive Branch, can't we just open the flood gates? I guess that would spread out the Russian money too thin like UBI.
__________________
If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you.
- Louis D. Brandeis
Griff is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-06-2020, 08:02 PM   #456
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
An update:

There have been a couple messages back and forth on this subject. One was a note indicating that an interim clearance would not be issued--not uncommon and not alarming. The other was a signed letter of intent to join their outfit in September--somewhat uncommon and somewhat reassuring.

Today I got an echo back from an investigator but no more breaking news than that. Good to know they're still working on it--still encouraged and still nervous.
__________________
Be Just and Fear Not.
BigV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-06-2020, 08:15 PM   #457
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
!!!

I've just taken a call from the Special Agent and we have scheduled a videoconference for tomorrow at midday.

SO STOKED!
__________________
Be Just and Fear Not.
BigV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-06-2020, 09:22 PM   #458
monster
I hear them call the tide
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Perpetual Chaos
Posts: 30,852
good luck!
__________________
The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart
monster is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-07-2020, 06:41 AM   #459
Griff
still says videotape
 
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 26,813
Huzzah!
__________________
If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you.
- Louis D. Brandeis
Griff is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-07-2020, 07:07 AM   #460
glatt
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 27,717
sweet!
glatt is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-07-2020, 07:13 AM   #461
fargon
Person who doesn't update the user title
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: La Crosse, WI
Posts: 8,924
Good Luck V.
__________________
Annoy the ones that ignore you!!!
I live a blessed life
I Love my Country, I Fear the Government!!!
Heavily medicated for the good of mankind.
fargon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-07-2020, 11:13 PM   #462
xoxoxoBruce
The future is unwritten
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
And then... and then???
__________________
The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.
xoxoxoBruce is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2020, 06:59 PM   #463
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
Hey everybody!

The interview has finally concluded.

I feel good about it (now). Yesterday was an epic failure. The DoD and subsidiary agencies are operating remotely in many instances as are we all due to the current COVID-19 crisis. This includes the agency conducting my background investigation. I received notice and invitation to a videoconference meeting via Microsoft Teams. Yesterday the Special Agent and I spent almost an hour trying to get me connected using the instructions and invitations (plural) she generated for our meeting, all to no avail. It was very discouraging.

We decided to try again today, but with the appointment booked as the last one on her schedule for the day in case we needed to hammer out the problems we encountered yesterday. This turned out to be a good idea. I won't go into / speculate why it didn't work. Well, not much. I used to be the mercenary admin for several companies that needed this work done but had no interest in doing the necessaries themselves. I had some thoughts on the matter.

But I did not think it was appropriate to barge in and mansplain to this person what she was doing wrong. That seemed very, very inappropriate. We worked together, me taking her lead, try, try, trying again and again to get the systems to connect using the instructions.... computer says not no hell no.

Finally, today, we/she got to the end of her rope after the better part of an hour trying to make it work. She said she'd contacted her tech support people and their first opening for assistance was tomorrow at 10am. Turns out I had some undeployed rope of my own. I explained that I have done this work for a living, that this was the work I was applying to do, etc, etc. and that I had some suggestions. I told her I'd done some research on the error messages displayed on my machine, found a useful FAQ from the Coast Guard related to this issue, and let's try something different. OK!

Well, we tried what I suggested and it worked. I believe there is some kind of misconfiguration in the template that she is using to generate the emailed invitation--that one never worked and we tried repeatedly. The instructions clearly state, and I quote:

Quote:
CONNECT

Please follow the personalized link below to access your video interview.

(link redacted)
Narp.

Her workflow produced two messages per invitation and I copied the contents of a link in the preceding message from her and was able to make it work. We finally got our respective computers to each display the camera feed of the other, audio worked, all was great! The interview was an anticlimax after that struggle, even if it did take more than an hour recovering ground I'd covered in the original *very* extensive background form.

We concluded the interview both glad to have finally succeeded. She said it had to go to a reviewer then to an adjudicator and then god knows where, but it seemed to be moving expeditiously. Spoken like an employed person, I said to myself.

Anyhow, back to waiting for the email to ring.
__________________
Be Just and Fear Not.
BigV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2020, 07:07 PM   #464
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
IRONICALLY


As I said, I am "working" from home, and she is also working remotely. During our non-video calls, my cat Cleo meowed and I (eyes rolling) said that's my cat, she wants on my lap since I'm sitting at the computer. She said she has a furry friend too, implying that she was not in her office.

Once we got connected the conversation got round to my address and she said, "XXXX Road?, I'm just off XXXX Road." Turns out we're neighbors.

Close neighbors. How close? Later in the interview someone exploded their last Fourth of July firework and we both jumped. I said "OH! Did you hear that through my computer mic?" She said "No, I heard it through my window!" Our houses are close enough that we're both hearing the same idiots blasting fireworks in the middle of the afternoon.

Later I thought, wtf, we could have just met up at freakin Starbucks.
__________________
Be Just and Fear Not.
BigV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2020, 05:48 AM   #465
Griff
still says videotape
 
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 26,813
Ha! Looks like people are falling into a new trap with all this video.
__________________
If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you.
- Louis D. Brandeis
Griff is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 01:08 AM.


Powered by: vBulletin Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.