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Old 03-23-2018, 11:19 AM   #1
monster
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This really sucks.

that is all.
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Old 03-23-2018, 11:25 AM   #2
Clodfobble
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It does. And will.

But you don't. You will take this thing and spit in its face and stomp on its attempts to hurt you. The battle is long, but my money's on you.
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Old 03-23-2018, 01:33 PM   #3
Griff
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Old 03-23-2018, 02:21 PM   #4
fargon
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ditto.
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Old 03-23-2018, 02:45 PM   #5
Pico and ME
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It's so hard, I know. My divorce felt like a death and not just of him. It impacts EVERYTHING. I can still feel what that dark fog felt like. I wish you sunshine soon.
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Old 03-23-2018, 03:00 PM   #6
Glinda
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I sympathise. Ever since my folks passed last summer, I've been slogging through all manner of fuckery trying to get all their accounts/memberships/etc., settled, closed, paid, reimbursed, renamed, re-addressed, and any other frickity-frickin' stupid thing you can think of (and a million more you wouldn't come up with).

Living in the aftermath does officially suck.

Word to the wise: do everything you possibly can right now to get your shit lined up and prepared for whomever follows you. Handling the minutiae of someone else's life is never easy (fuck bureaucracy and red tape!), but the more you can do now, the better.


{{monster}}
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Old 03-23-2018, 06:05 PM   #7
limey
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Quote:
Originally Posted by monster View Post
that is all.


Yes. It does. But you will get through it. But fuckit, it certainly sucks right now. X


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Old 03-25-2018, 12:28 AM   #8
BigV
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Sorry monster

You're right, it really sucks.
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Old 05-01-2018, 08:49 PM   #9
monster
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and crash...... this is so stupid. I loved the movie Ghost (who didn't). Unchained Melody was one of the songs at our wedding. That neato priest I found on Youtube singing Every body hurts carried on autoplaying in the background into two contestants singing the same song I had never heard of before but the lyrics caught my attention.

It's from the musical of Ghost (didn't even know there was one). This is how I feel. I keep finding things of his and deal with them like he was still here. Because. I don't know. It's not like I haven't thrown stuff of his away. but most is still here

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Old 05-02-2018, 05:00 AM   #10
lumberjim
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Sorry, buddy. The shock is wearing off. The permanace sets in. I can't offer any useful advice because I haven't gone through what you're going through. Wish I could, glad I can't.

Only thing I can say is sorry. Wish I could offer a hug....
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Old 05-02-2018, 06:05 AM   #11
limey
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Quote:
Originally Posted by monster View Post
and crash...... I keep finding things of his and deal with them like he was still here. Because. I don't know. It's not like I haven't thrown stuff of his away. but most is still here
Keep the stuff you want to keep. Get rid of the stuff you want to get rid of. If you have any doubts keep it for now. It's a long, l-o-o-o-ng process, I'm afraid. When we'd just lost my brother there were all sorts of things we just couldn't imagine getting rid of because well, just because (and we didn't even live with him and his stuff at the time). As time passed we have begun to feel we can let some of it go, but some still stays. Is used. Or just looked at now and again.
Hugs to you xxx
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Old 05-02-2018, 06:06 AM   #12
Griff
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This does suck.
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Old 05-02-2018, 12:09 PM   #13
Flint
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It sucks HARD. Like smashing your face into a solid slab of concrete. It's that immovable. My advice is, learn to enjoy having your face smashed into a solid slab of concrete. It's not working for me, but I don't have any better ideas.
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Old 05-02-2018, 05:40 PM   #14
monster
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Quote:
Originally Posted by limey View Post
Keep the stuff you want to keep. Get rid of the stuff you want to get rid of. If you have any doubts keep it for now. It's a long, l-o-o-o-ng process, I'm afraid. When we'd just lost my brother there were all sorts of things we just couldn't imagine getting rid of because well, just because (and we didn't even live with him and his stuff at the time). As time passed we have begun to feel we can let some of it go, but some still stays. Is used. Or just looked at now and again.
Hugs to you xxx
Yeah, I'm just doing it as I can be bothered/the mood takes me. But I occasionally find myself just dealing with things as if he'll use them again rather than deciding whether I want to toss it now or leave it for another day.

I miss him.
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Old 05-03-2018, 11:23 AM   #15
limey
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Quote:
Originally Posted by monster View Post
... But I occasionally find myself just dealing with things as if he'll use them again rather than deciding whether I want to toss it now or leave it for another day.
But that's fine. You can't keep on making big decisions about this stuff all the time. Just putting things away without deciding anything is also good.

Quote:
Originally Posted by monster View Post
I miss him.
Yes. x
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