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Old 04-10-2008, 01:15 PM   #181
zippyt
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Old 04-12-2008, 10:00 AM   #182
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Old 04-12-2008, 12:33 PM   #183
Sundae
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HM woke me up today. This has happened before in a similar way.
I'm going to have to say something about it.

Everyone grows up with some of their parents' issues (a la Larkin) and mine is that I think it is selfish, unreasonable and disrespectful to wake up someone when they are sleeping. To decide on their behalf - in this case without knowing the circumstances - that it is now okay to make a racket, especially when said person has two jobs, one day off a week and has tiptioed around for 6 months because of different sleep patterns... Can you see that I'm wound up?

I'd probably try to swallow it, but we've had a couple fo HUGE rows where I have done something that to me was fairly minor and he has reacted as if I was breaking every social rule and norm and was utterly selfish and wrong. I'm not doing this as revenge, but in view of his reaction I feel I am justified in trying to establish my personal views on him.

The actual situation was nothing dramatic - he got a call at 11.30 which obviously woke him up. I had been reading & dozing, and had my earplugs out because sometimes the cats make a racket and I lure them back to bed. After his call - during which I just lay there, not having properly woken - he put his radio on full blast. Bye-bye any chance of drifting back off.

I know it sounds SO lazy. But it's more the principle.
I could racket round the house every morning getting ready for work - and again when I come back from work at the pub and wake the bugger up. But why would I? He'll be up early enough/ late enough when he's working again - it's no skin off my nose to be quiet in the mornings or after midnight. I just don't like the idea he thought, "Well it's gone 11.30. I can do what I want."

It's symptomatic of various things he does where I approach it with him in mind (ie if he's in bed when I get home I keep quiet or if there's toothbrush confusion as recently I check with him - he just threw mine away because he decided it wasn't being used). And yet I still get told off for being selfish sometimes. I need to learn to speak up when I am unhappy.

Oh dear - I was so clear on this when I was woken up. I was so convinced I was in the right. Typing this I sound like a lazy slacker with an axe to grind.

How irritating.
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Old 04-12-2008, 08:04 PM   #184
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Nope. You havent said anything here that would constitute laziness or being unreasonable. (but then again of see shades of your partner in mine so I do feel for you)
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Old 04-12-2008, 09:06 PM   #185
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What's mildly irritating you today?
Everything.
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Old 04-13-2008, 05:18 AM   #186
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even me?
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Old 04-13-2008, 05:24 AM   #187
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Old 04-13-2008, 05:38 AM   #188
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Kiss my arse, syc.
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Old 04-13-2008, 05:44 AM   #189
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Old 04-13-2008, 05:48 AM   #190
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I was never good at hiding my true feelings :p
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Old 04-13-2008, 09:10 AM   #191
Trilby
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Hey, my JP came out friday so I'm good! so...uh, I guess nothing is mildly irritating me--except sundae's rude HM and she is NOT being lazy or grinding an axe--the guy is being rude.
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Old 04-13-2008, 10:49 AM   #192
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SG you're not being lazy. Then again, he is not being unreasonable imo wanting to be up and active and noisy at 11 am. Neither of you are being unreasonable on this. He is not up and about at some ungodly hour wrecking any chance of a sunday lie-in at that time...but then again you are entitled to want your day to start when you want it to and not have morning imposed on you earlier than you'd wish.

I wouldn't make a issue out of it SG, it's just one of those things. It's impossible to share a house with another person ( I think) without your needs/desires/styles conflicting from time to time.
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Old 04-14-2008, 07:17 AM   #193
Sundae
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I feel like such a loser.
I've been drinking too much recently - I recognised that myself - and I told myself it had to stop this week.
So yesterday afternoon, when I finished in the pub I "allowed" myself one more day before the cut off point of Monday morning.

So I stayed drinking with some of the regulars, right up until closing time.
I suspected one of them was chatting me up, but knowing he had a girlfriend reassured me that it was all harmless fun. Then he walked me home and I snogged him and we even had a bit of a (clothes on) fumble.

I feel awful.
Part of it is drink-guilt (where I feel horrible about myself the next day regardless) but a lot is just shame.

I can't do anything about it now, except promise myself it won't happen again. I just wanted to confess to someone I think, hoping to get it out of my head!

Oh and Dana I think you're right about the waking up thing. I'm calmer now - I tend to lose it a bit when it's just happened. I haven't really seen him all weekend and it wouldn't be right to bring it up now. I might mention it casually at the end of the week, just in terms of "I'm going to have a lovely lie-in on Saturday, I'm really looking forward to it." That was it's a positive reminder not an angry response.
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Old 04-14-2008, 10:26 AM   #194
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SteveDallas View Post
Everything.
Quote:
Originally Posted by DucksNuts View Post
even me?
Quote:
Originally Posted by sycamore View Post
Especially you!
I said "everything." Not "everyone."

Though it's still early . . . . .
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Old 04-14-2008, 11:27 AM   #195
warch
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Aaahhhk.
A great coworker for 8 years is about to get the ax and there is nothing I can do and there will be huge fallout. I know it but she doesnt yet. and I have to play like I dont know cause I'm not supposed to know.
She had the audacity to speak plainly to her supervisor who is now firmly revealed himself to be a dick, as is our big boss. She was very professional, but he was not. Its all infantile. Now my supervisor, a lateral person in the power scheme is also threatened with firing (shes worked here for 20 years) for trying to be an adult and sit all down and talk. And I am in the toxic wake. The big boss is stomping around like a psycho. I have my headphones on, can't really work, so I this is my plea for sanity. Is anyone out there? Why cant people with power be fair and sane?
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