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Old 02-17-2004, 10:22 PM   #1
arsen
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Join Date: Feb 2004
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Angry this is Mr. StaceyV

Hi!
By request from beloved wife, Stacey, i'm writing this to explain my situation - so you'd know my side of the story.
For those who doesn't - look @ StaceyV's thread - "i need advice really bad"
I really love my wife. You might not believe me like she doesn't - but this is how I feel. Everything I do in my life I do for her. Maybe I do a lot of fuckups, but nobody's perfect and you know it. At least I try not to commit the same mistakes all over again.
I am proud to be married and I am proud to call her my wife. The vows I gave her when we got married were and are truly said.
Let me make myself clear on that.
The relationship I had with Eva was crazy. First things first - I never slept with her. So she is not even my ex-girlfriend. I was in love with her for short period of time - but it was crazy love and I have no intentions to deny it. I'd say that was my first childish love - short but intense.
We were together for VERY short period of time - about 10 days or so, and after that she left to Florida first, came back for a night and left for Slovakia for good.
When she came back from Florida and wasn't even excited to see her. All the power has dissapered somewhere. I really don't why.
I guess that's just the type of a man I was.
When she left I to Florida I cried like a baby. I thought I lost my future, my life, my only love.
When she left to Slovakia, in a short period of time I lost my job, my place, my friends, computer, DVD player and my cell phone. Now, that was worse than losing my life.
I ended up in a room 12x15 feet with no tv, computer two beds and a private bath in a house I had to share with 11 other people including my landlord. By the way, I shared my room with a heroin addict, who was stealing my personal belongings. I lost most of my CD's and all my DVDs to that fucker. I guess he was pushing it for a dose. It all ended up by him stealing a camcoder and a digital camera from a guy from another room - he got kicked out after that.
To cut a long story short after everything I had - I got nothing. The house was close to the library and that was my only shelter - to spend time in the internet hall - just not to see the deepness of my fall...
That is how those letters have started. I don't know if Stacey posted all of them - but, no. Actually - i started writing the letters when Eva left to Florida - i think i exhausted my feelings to her in the letters i was throwing at her.
Anyway, when i lost everything and even more - the guy i worked with for about two weeks went to the Keys and was found dead - the only thing I had was her - Eva, my pen friend, my first kiddish love.
She was always there, waiting for me in the library like an escape from appaling existence. She gave me advices, she was there to caress me, she was the one to listen, she was the only good thing i had left.
But! Time is a powerful thing. Little by little I started to slack off on her. I wasn't running to the library like before, wasn't waiting for her to answer, found some other things to do, got my job back, and PLEASE DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF MJ!!!
Eva understood everything - she offered to be a friend - and I didn't say anything.
This is when StaceyV walked into my life. When I saw her for the first time - I knew she was THE ONE.
I didn't live with her at the very beginning - but we ended up together pretty quick - I needed a place to stay. So that's how we became lovers that live together - she didn't mind, nor did I.
Eva?
I kept writing her the letters with flame in words and indifference in my heart - I couldn't do otherwise. She was something more
to me than just a friend and I couldn't understand how to be just a friend. To write about how the weather was??? Some people are easy to break up and be friends, some not. I wasn't.
Life went on, I changed a lot, I grew mentally and psysically. We got married things went different directions, but i was still writing those letters. Why? I don't know. I couldn't make myself write differently, though I felt differently.
Now the main question here is:
Was I honest with Stacey or with Eva at that point of our lives when I was married to Stacey and kept writing to Eva?
Truly answer would be with both. Betraying on of them would be like betrayal of the part of your own self - impossible. I managed to persuade myself how deeply i was in love with Eva and didn't want tol leave that false belief. I managed to have fallen in love with Stacey and didn't have the power to stop writing to Eva - to betray what we had together.

Shoot me now - I am all open now! Open your evil mouthes and kill my lame excuses - despise me!!!

Arsen.

By the way, my citizenship is not even close - I didn't file anything
yet.
Was it one of the reasons of me marring Stacey?
Yes.
Was it the only one?
No.
NO.
NO.NO.NO.
I just love her. simple as that. I felt that way when I saw her for the first time.
I'm spared.
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Old 02-17-2004, 10:45 PM   #2
mrnoodle
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Re: this is Mr. StaceyV

First of all, let me be clear in saying that I am not interested in trying to anger you, abuse you, or otherwise engage in verbal sparring with you for my own amusement.

But do NOT try to feed me a pile of dog crap and call it ice cream.

Quote:
Originally posted by arsen
[paraphrase]blahblahblah my life is soooo complex. I should be excused for acting like a self-absorbed wanker with no regard for anyone's feelings but my own. [/paraphrase]
I don't care what country you're from, I don't care how miserable you think your existence is, I don't care how you define love. When you marry someone, you are making a vow. You are promising them, in the presence of signed witnesses, that you are now taking the sacred responsibility of tying your life to theirs. This means that without the express consent of your life partner, you may not engage in a romantic relationship, a sexual relationship, or any other form of relationship with another person. And for those about to call me to task on this, you know what the fuck I mean. I'm not talking friendships, I'm talking mushy you-complete-me letters, secret meetings, etc. etc. etc. ad nauseum.

If you can't live up to your side of the marriage, don't get married. If you have any other reason other than undying devotion for getting married, you have the obligation to make damn sure the other party knows it in advance so they don't fuck up years of their life trying to figure out why the hell they can't make you happy. It's worse than mismanaging your love life. It's being cruel to someone you purport to love. That's not acceptable, and it sickens any right-thinking person.

[/rant]
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Old 02-17-2004, 10:51 PM   #3
arsen
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just for your information:
i never fucked her.
we dated for 10 days and not two weeks
my wife opened my email account because i gave her the password for my computer account and it happenes to be the same as my e-mail's - im lazy
I never gave her permission to read my e-mail nor to post it to you.
I trusted her absolutely that's why i didn't delete them - I couldn't even think she'd read them without asking me.
Arsen
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Old 02-17-2004, 10:54 PM   #4
arsen
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But do NOT try to feed me a pile of dog crap and call it ice cream.

You're entitled in your opinion but I never was unfaithful to my wife.
Not in my heart, not in my mind, not in real life.
That's all.
Arsen

I can be an asshole too, you know.
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Old 02-17-2004, 10:59 PM   #5
mrnoodle
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If you think the relationship you had with another woman while you were married is proper and appropriate, then no amount of yelling at you will change your mind. You need to stop defending yourself and figure out why you are cheating. Your dick does not need to get wet to constitute cheating. It's a state of mind. That's my opinion, at least, and you certainly don't have to share it.

You also lose your privacy when you get married. If you have nothing to hide, there's no reason why both of you shouldn't have access to every file on your computer. Why the hell shouldn't she read them?

I realize you're on the defensive, but you should be. If you still long for a private life, don't be married. You're still trying to sugar coat this, and not all of us fall for bullshit. I've seen enough cheating people to see the signs of guilt, and I wouldn't be at all surprised if you were still doing it with someone. Not sex per se, but contact with this woman or another woman. You don't have the demeanor of someone who realizes they have done wrong and are taking steps to correct it. You have the demeanor of someone who is just sorry they got caught, and is trying to spin the situation in their favor.
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Old 02-17-2004, 11:00 PM   #6
elSicomoro
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Quote:
Originally posted by arsen
I can be an asshole too, you know.
I really don't think you want to try that here...
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Old 02-17-2004, 11:12 PM   #7
arsen
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this is staceyv writing this:

arsen says you are "spitting on his soul" and that he opened his heart to you. he is very offended, especially by sycamore's coments, and he says he is never posting here again, and that i should delete his account.

don't kill the messenger. i think he has a hard time dealing with your brutally honest opinions. personally, i appreciate them, that's why i come here......thanks.
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Old 02-17-2004, 11:15 PM   #8
elSicomoro
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Quote:
Originally posted by arsen
he is very offended, especially by sycamore's coments, and he says he is never posting here again, and that i should delete his account.
*pumps his fist* Damn I'm good!
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Old 02-17-2004, 11:16 PM   #9
mrnoodle
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People who are used to smooth-talking their way out of everything they fuck up usually can't stand up under close scrutiny. Spitting on his soul? Dramatic. Does that kind of hyperbole usually work with people? I guess I'm immune.
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Old 02-17-2004, 11:26 PM   #10
elSicomoro
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In all seriousness...

Stacey and Arsen,

My "commie" comment was out of line. It was not right of me to say that without Arsen being out of line...and he wasn't...yet.

I apologize.
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Old 02-17-2004, 11:26 PM   #11
juju
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Quote:
Originally posted by sycamore
*pumps his fist* Damn I'm good!
Heh heh.. Dude, you spit on his soul!

Hey, maybe all Russians are really intense like that?
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Old 02-17-2004, 11:29 PM   #12
Undertoad
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Dude asked to be despised and then got ticked off when he was.

I'd still go with the therapist.
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Old 02-17-2004, 11:41 PM   #13
Michael Roth
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Quote:
Originally posted by sycamore


*pumps his fist* Damn I'm good!

I am pretty damn sure that is the first time I've seen anyone accused of spitting on someone else's soul.
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Old 02-18-2004, 12:17 AM   #14
FileNotFound
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Hey I'm Russian and I think I'm not "intense"...unlike my driving.

Didn't you supposedly lose your virginity to her? It seems like an inconsistancy here...

And Syc if you called him a commie I'm not surprised that he got pissed off...most Russians living outside of Russia do. Just cause we hold "commies" responsible for turning Russia into the shit hole that it now is and forcing us to abandon the sinking ship that it now is. Of course you couldn't possibly have known that so I think anyone who reacts so poorly to it is a fucktard.

It's too bad that Arsen was so intimidated by all the whale penis sized assholes here that he ran away shivering in fear and promising to never post here again.
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Old 02-18-2004, 12:22 AM   #15
quzah
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Quote:
Originally posted by sycamore
*pumps his fist* Damn I'm good!
Yeah, but if his soul was on fire, would you spit on it to put it out?

Quzah.
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