Funny/Embarrassing things they say - Page 32

classicman · 06-12-2009, 08:26 AM

HA - very funny!
and welcome to the cellar.

Shawnee123 · 06-12-2009, 09:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeepOne

I have one that's more me embarrassing my son than him saying something funny.
He comes out of the kitchen with a handful of nuts and says "you know, I like nuts by themselves, but I don't like them mixed up in things"
and my husband and I just sat there giggling and snickering and he goes "ugh, you guys are supposed to be the mature ones".

Excellent!

And welcome!

Shawnee123 · 06-22-2009, 11:36 AM

More from the mouth of the now 4 year old (birthday was Saturday):

4YO: Mommy can we watch (whatever it was) when we get home?

Mommy: Honey, they took that off, we can't watch it anymore (it was something free on HBO on Demand or something.)

4YO: Those terrorists, always taking the movies we want to watch.

BigV · 06-23-2009, 12:13 PM

(SonofV, musically)
"...dee dah dah, But you did, but you did,
And I thank you!"

(slightly aggravated)
Dad! You got that song stuck in my head!!!"

Hahahah! You're welcome, son! No problem.

lumberjim · 06-25-2009, 07:00 PM

a brief exchange between jinx and myself over gchat:

jinx: I really need to stop finding your toothpick/flosser things on my desk, kthxbai

jim: you can't prove it was me

jinx: I could kill you in your sleep and see if it stops happening

I Lolled. out loud.

Shawnee123 · 06-25-2009, 07:02 PM

Has anyone else noticed the whole "jinx kills jim" theme?

Aliantha · 06-25-2009, 07:04 PM

I've noticed. I keep wondering when she's going to stop threatening and follow through. lol

Not that I really want lumberjim dead or anything.

lumberjim · 06-25-2009, 07:19 PM

shouldn't you be busy neglecting your child?

Aliantha · 06-25-2009, 07:21 PM

Shouldn't you be busy picking your teeth?

eta: I have never neglected my children.

SteveDallas · 08-22-2009, 11:45 PM

A few days back Miss Dallas was, much against her will, helping Mrs. Dallas with the laundry. She thought it was absolutely hilarious that the Hanes boxer briefs I wear have pockets.

What she didn't realize was that the "Hanes" logo goes at the front left hip. Not in the center. What she thought was a "pocket" on the right side was really the y-front fly.

Clodfobble · 09-19-2009, 08:45 PM

You know that kid schtick where they ask a really complicated question right as you're trying to put them to bed?

Tonight's question from my stepdaughter was, "Why isn't electricity affected by gravity?"

SteveDallas · 09-19-2009, 09:43 PM

So.... what'd you tell her???

wolf · 09-19-2009, 11:47 PM

Because Mommy and Daddy Fobble haven't paid the gravity bill.

Alternate answer: Well, it is, but because electricity is invisible you can't see it leaking out of the outlets and running down the walls and all over the floor. That's why you can scuff your good shoes on the carpet to collect up all the electricity that fell down there and then make a spark by touching someone's nose.

It's never too early to start screwing them up.

Clodfobble · 09-20-2009, 08:56 AM

Mr. Fob told her that electricity wasn't a thing so much as a movement. He pushed her in the arm and said, "My arm is affected by gravity, your shoulder is affected by gravity... but that push you felt wasn't affected by gravity. Now go to bed."

monster · 09-29-2009, 08:35 AM

I confirmed to Thor that he would be getting a new shirt and socks for his hockey team -with the pro team (Whalers) logo on it. He said "I'm frozen with delight" (in a non-sarcastic way). aaaawww.

06-12-2009, 08:26 AM	#466
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	HA - very funny! and welcome to the cellar. __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

06-22-2009, 11:36 AM	#468
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	More from the mouth of the now 4 year old (birthday was Saturday): 4YO: Mommy can we watch (whatever it was) when we get home? Mommy: Honey, they took that off, we can't watch it anymore (it was something free on HBO on Demand or something.) 4YO: Those terrorists, always taking the movies we want to watch. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

06-23-2009, 12:13 PM	#469
BigV Goon Squad Leader Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Seattle Posts: 27,063	(SonofV, musically) "...dee dah dah, But you did, but you did, And I thank you!" (slightly aggravated) Dad! You got that song stuck in my head!!!" Hahahah! You're welcome, son! No problem. __________________ Be Just and Fear Not.

06-25-2009, 07:00 PM	#470
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	a brief exchange between jinx and myself over gchat: jinx: I really need to stop finding your toothpick/flosser things on my desk, kthxbai jim: you can't prove it was me jinx: I could kill you in your sleep and see if it stops happening I Lolled. out loud. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

06-25-2009, 07:02 PM	#471
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	Has anyone else noticed the whole "jinx kills jim" theme? __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

06-25-2009, 07:04 PM	#472
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	I've noticed. I keep wondering when she's going to stop threatening and follow through. lol Not that I really want lumberjim dead or anything. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

06-25-2009, 07:19 PM	#473
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	shouldn't you be busy neglecting your child? __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

06-25-2009, 07:21 PM	#474
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Shouldn't you be busy picking your teeth? eta: I have never neglected my children. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber Last edited by Aliantha; 06-25-2009 at 08:28 PM.

08-22-2009, 11:45 PM	#475
SteveDallas Your Bartender Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Philly Burbs, PA Posts: 7,651	A few days back Miss Dallas was, much against her will, helping Mrs. Dallas with the laundry. She thought it was absolutely hilarious that the Hanes boxer briefs I wear have pockets. What she didn't realize was that the "Hanes" logo goes at the front left hip. Not in the center. What she thought was a "pocket" on the right side was really the y-front fly.

09-19-2009, 08:45 PM	#476
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	You know that kid schtick where they ask a really complicated question right as you're trying to put them to bed? Tonight's question from my stepdaughter was, "Why isn't electricity affected by gravity?" __________________ My book My other book My spirit animal

09-19-2009, 09:43 PM	#477
SteveDallas Your Bartender Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Philly Burbs, PA Posts: 7,651	So.... what'd you tell her???

09-19-2009, 11:47 PM	#478
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Because Mommy and Daddy Fobble haven't paid the gravity bill. Alternate answer: Well, it is, but because electricity is invisible you can't see it leaking out of the outlets and running down the walls and all over the floor. That's why you can scuff your good shoes on the carpet to collect up all the electricity that fell down there and then make a spark by touching someone's nose. It's never too early to start screwing them up. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

09-20-2009, 08:56 AM	#479
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	Mr. Fob told her that electricity wasn't a thing so much as a movement. He pushed her in the arm and said, "My arm is affected by gravity, your shoulder is affected by gravity... but that push you felt wasn't affected by gravity. Now go to bed." __________________ My book My other book My spirit animal

09-29-2009, 08:35 AM	#480
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	I confirmed to Thor that he would be getting a new shirt and socks for his hockey team -with the pro team (Whalers) logo on it. He said "I'm frozen with delight" (in a non-sarcastic way). aaaawww. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

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