For the Aussies, a plea for help - Page 2

DanaC · 11-07-2008, 05:34 AM

As long as one of them is 12 or over I dont see that's inconsistent

ZenGum · 11-07-2008, 06:47 AM

I haven't watched the video because my connection is crappy at present.

If he hasn't seen the kids regularly since twelve years ago, presumably the adults have been estranged that long ... so how come one of the kids is ten? Is it his? I think that is Clodfobble's point.

As an Aussie, I defer to Ali on this one. I know very little about such matters except that what she said sounds right. And she is in a position to know.

I hope everything works out though.

Clodfobble · 11-07-2008, 08:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DanaC

As long as one of them is 12 or over I dont see that's inconsistent

Quote:

Originally Posted by ZenGum

If he hasn't seen the kids regularly since twelve years ago, presumably the adults have been estranged that long ... so how come one of the kids is ten?

Right, it's not impossible, it just means that he spent one of his three-visits-in-twelve-years knocking up the mother, whom he had presumably not seen in two years at this point--since the math seems to indicate he became estranged from her when the older child was two, and then the second child was conceived when the older child was four.

There's more to the story here, is all I'm saying.

monster · 11-07-2008, 10:05 AM

What made you fall in love with him, Treas?

Sundae · 11-07-2008, 02:22 PM

I knew a man who got his estranged gf pregnant when he went back to see his two kids. He'd moved about 100 miles away for a new job, and was in the process of severing ties with home because all of a sudden he was considered young, free and single and was loving it. His weekends home went from fortnightly to monthly to occasionally.

He knocked her up for the third time during a guilt visit. He started seeing another woman during the pregnancy, and refused to answer his mobile phone the night his son was born because he knew it was his ex's family and he didn't want it to spoil his new gf's night out. He didn't even see his new son for a month, then went up there with stacks of presents and came back with Proud Daddy photos.

BLEURGH.

Of course I am not saying this is what happened in your case Trea, but do make sure you know the facts, and check them carefully before bringing a new man into your baby girl's life. And make sure you use contraception!

I think that's enough pushing for now.

Cicero · 11-07-2008, 05:47 PM

I hate those stories. Naughty. Plbbt.

Minx · 11-07-2008, 06:08 PM

As has been previously pointed out - the Child Support Agency would have contact details for the Mother

The only reason I can imagine for him being denied access or knowledge of their whereabouts would be if there had been violence in the relationship and a Court Order exists to protect the woman an her children

Again...be very careful with Net love affairs..my ex :"fell in love" with a woman, she was everything he dreamed of and was totally besotted. She was pushing for him to go and live in California, he got her to come out here for a visit and quickly discovered that the promise didn't live up to the reality.

Cicero · 11-07-2008, 06:13 PM

That's what I was worried about, that he's nuckin' futz and his privileges were removed.

Something's not right, outside of the fact that he seems like a compulsive liar.

But I'm usually full of it, so don't listen to me.

Bruce 9012 · 11-07-2008, 08:06 PM

Dump the wanker do right by your children

Treasenuak · 11-07-2008, 08:42 PM

Why I fell in love with him... He treats me like a princess. He sent me $600 American to help me out of a tough spot. He knows how to make me laugh. He knows the good and the horrible parts of me and accepts and loves me anyways. That's the nutshell version. But if ALL of you are telling me something sounds fishy, I'm sure as hell listening up. Too many people saying the same thing means there's a damn good reason for it.

monster · 11-07-2008, 10:32 PM

we love you, we make you laugh, we think you're worth more than $600. slow down, don't sell yourself short. Don't sell yourself at all, in fact.

monster · 11-07-2008, 10:33 PM

(are you really in love with him? really?)

Undertoad · 11-07-2008, 11:10 PM

Note, I am a poor judge of people and I may be wrong.

Help me find my girls.

Other than their first names, I won't describe them in any way.

I saw them a year ago shopping. I won't tell you where. That would make it too easy for you.

They are in the charge of a single mother. I will not reveal any details about this person, although that would confirm the girls' identity for certain. Again, that would make it easier. But no. You need a challenge.

I will mention that, so far, to find them, I have used only methods that any sane person would find ridiculous, such as calling everybody in the phone book, or recording Youtube videos as pleas for help into the ether. This hasn't worked.

I'm not sure why mama believes that a relationship with their father would be a bad idea for these children, I only know that it's unfair to be treated as I have been treated. Here, let me tell you about how unfair it is, rather than give you details that might help you find my children.

Treasenuak · 11-08-2008, 08:16 AM

Monster: A week ago, I would have said yes, unequivocally. Now, I'm not sure. There have been some things said in recent conversations that are really making me wonder about him.

Undertoad: Excellent points. Now debating whether to point that out to him or just leave it alone.

Undertoad · 11-08-2008, 09:00 AM

I am a poor judge of people and I may be wrong.

Why use methods that wouldn't work. The strangest bit of the video is where he considers trying a missing persons report. This too wouldn't work - the cops wouldn't take it, because they aren't actually missing.

But then, that same day, he sees them live in person. Firstly this seems very weirdly coincidental. "I was going to file a missing persons report but then I saw them." It seems invented. It doesn't stop you from filing a missing persons report, either. My next question would be, in such a state of desperation, why would you not approach them?

What a chance to ask mama why no contact allowed, if it's a mystery. Or to collect further information, perhaps from the girls themselves? Or for just a longer moment of contact out of a decade of time? Would it be a public spectacle? Well, to have a chance to see and interact with one's children, you'd take that risk, wouldn't you? You'd pretty much leave the car in the middle of the parking lot and run at full speed wouldn't you?

He would have had to be in a position where he was close enough to identify them, although he hasn't seen them in years - and, therefore, close enough to find and track them, even in a crowd. So Treas, if I were you, I would ask this question - why didn't you approach them - and then try to figure out whether the answer is plausible.

11-07-2008, 06:47 AM	#17
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	I haven't watched the video because my connection is crappy at present. If he hasn't seen the kids regularly since twelve years ago, presumably the adults have been estranged that long ... so how come one of the kids is ten? Is it his? I think that is Clodfobble's point. As an Aussie, I defer to Ali on this one. I know very little about such matters except that what she said sounds right. And she is in a position to know. I hope everything works out though. __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

11-07-2008, 10:05 AM	#19
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	What made you fall in love with him, Treas? __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

11-07-2008, 05:47 PM	#21
Cicero Looking forward to open mic night. Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: New Mexico Posts: 5,148	I hate those stories. Naughty. Plbbt. __________________ Show me a sane man, and I will cure him for you.- Carl Jung

11-07-2008, 06:13 PM	#23
Cicero Looking forward to open mic night. Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: New Mexico Posts: 5,148	That's what I was worried about, that he's nuckin' futz and his privileges were removed. Something's not right, outside of the fact that he seems like a compulsive liar. But I'm usually full of it, so don't listen to me. __________________ Show me a sane man, and I will cure him for you.- Carl Jung

11-07-2008, 10:32 PM	#26
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	we love you, we make you laugh, we think you're worth more than $600. slow down, don't sell yourself short. Don't sell yourself at all, in fact. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

11-07-2008, 05:34 AM	#16
DanaC We have to go back, Kate! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 25,964	As long as one of them is 12 or over I dont see that's inconsistent

11-07-2008, 02:22 PM	#20
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	I knew a man who got his estranged gf pregnant when he went back to see his two kids. He'd moved about 100 miles away for a new job, and was in the process of severing ties with home because all of a sudden he was considered young, free and single and was loving it. His weekends home went from fortnightly to monthly to occasionally. He knocked her up for the third time during a guilt visit. He started seeing another woman during the pregnancy, and refused to answer his mobile phone the night his son was born because he knew it was his ex's family and he didn't want it to spoil his new gf's night out. He didn't even see his new son for a month, then went up there with stacks of presents and came back with Proud Daddy photos. BLEURGH. Of course I am not saying this is what happened in your case Trea, but do make sure you know the facts, and check them carefully before bringing a new man into your baby girl's life. And make sure you use contraception! I think that's enough pushing for now.

11-07-2008, 06:08 PM	#22
Minx Layperson Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Adelaide, Australia Posts: 13	As has been previously pointed out - the Child Support Agency would have contact details for the Mother The only reason I can imagine for him being denied access or knowledge of their whereabouts would be if there had been violence in the relationship and a Court Order exists to protect the woman an her children Again...be very careful with Net love affairs..my ex :"fell in love" with a woman, she was everything he dreamed of and was totally besotted. She was pushing for him to go and live in California, he got her to come out here for a visit and quickly discovered that the promise didn't live up to the reality.

11-07-2008, 08:06 PM	#24
Bruce 9012 Living in the blast crater Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Dayton, Oh Posts: 123	Dump the wanker do right by your children

11-07-2008, 08:42 PM	#25
Treasenuak Multiorgasmic and wrapped in plastic Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Central Tennessee Posts: 483	Why I fell in love with him... He treats me like a princess. He sent me $600 American to help me out of a tough spot. He knows how to make me laugh. He knows the good and the horrible parts of me and accepts and loves me anyways. That's the nutshell version. But if ALL of you are telling me something sounds fishy, I'm sure as hell listening up. Too many people saying the same thing means there's a damn good reason for it.

11-07-2008, 10:33 PM	#27
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	(are you really in love with him? really?) __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

11-07-2008, 11:10 PM	#28
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	Note, I am a poor judge of people and I may be wrong. Help me find my girls. Other than their first names, I won't describe them in any way. I saw them a year ago shopping. I won't tell you where. That would make it too easy for you. They are in the charge of a single mother. I will not reveal any details about this person, although that would confirm the girls' identity for certain. Again, that would make it easier. But no. You need a challenge. I will mention that, so far, to find them, I have used only methods that any sane person would find ridiculous, such as calling everybody in the phone book, or recording Youtube videos as pleas for help into the ether. This hasn't worked. I'm not sure why mama believes that a relationship with their father would be a bad idea for these children, I only know that it's unfair to be treated as I have been treated. Here, let me tell you about how unfair it is, rather than give you details that might help you find my children.

11-08-2008, 08:16 AM	#29
Treasenuak Multiorgasmic and wrapped in plastic Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Central Tennessee Posts: 483	Monster: A week ago, I would have said yes, unequivocally. Now, I'm not sure. There have been some things said in recent conversations that are really making me wonder about him. Undertoad: Excellent points. Now debating whether to point that out to him or just leave it alone.

11-08-2008, 09:00 AM	#30
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	I am a poor judge of people and I may be wrong. Why use methods that wouldn't work. The strangest bit of the video is where he considers trying a missing persons report. This too wouldn't work - the cops wouldn't take it, because they aren't actually missing. But then, that same day, he sees them live in person. Firstly this seems very weirdly coincidental. "I was going to file a missing persons report but then I saw them." It seems invented. It doesn't stop you from filing a missing persons report, either. My next question would be, in such a state of desperation, why would you not approach them? What a chance to ask mama why no contact allowed, if it's a mystery. Or to collect further information, perhaps from the girls themselves? Or for just a longer moment of contact out of a decade of time? Would it be a public spectacle? Well, to have a chance to see and interact with one's children, you'd take that risk, wouldn't you? You'd pretty much leave the car in the middle of the parking lot and run at full speed wouldn't you? He would have had to be in a position where he was close enough to identify them, although he hasn't seen them in years - and, therefore, close enough to find and track them, even in a crowd. So Treas, if I were you, I would ask this question - why didn't you approach them - and then try to figure out whether the answer is plausible.

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