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Parenting Bringing up the shorties so they aren't completely messed up

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Old 09-26-2011, 11:22 PM   #46
ZenGum
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Odd. Has anyone asked Coach to ... explain ... ?
I'm trying to think from the coach's point of view. Here are the events to fill, here are the swimmers I have. Hmm...
This team already has four star breaststrokers (straightfacestraightfacestraightface) doesn't it? And they're seniors, so they will swim the breaststroke events. Hebe is good, but as a novice, will have to swim what is available. Next year she'll be doing the breaststroke.
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Old 09-27-2011, 06:29 AM   #47
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it's not that, though. She is a top placer in IM already. It's that she said one thing then did the complete opposite. And if she wants her to do well in the 500, why is she wearing her out with all the other distance events? And she's got 4 events. Plenty freshmen will swim only one (which means that SG is a valued team member), but they could "fill up" in other ways.

The one thing I know is unless it is physically damaging your girl YOU NEVER QUESTION COACH!

So i'mm'a just be puzzled here instead.
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Old 09-27-2011, 08:36 AM   #48
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"That which does not kill me makes me stronger?"

or maybe the coach has an un-diagnosed brain tumor? No one ever expects that.

Or the, umm, you know. That other thing no one ever expects.
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Old 09-27-2011, 09:12 AM   #49
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Lupus?
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Old 09-27-2011, 08:35 PM   #50
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The Spanish Inquisition?


Quote:
YOU NEVER QUESTION COACH!
Sod that. Let her know that you accept her decision, but would like help understanding your (kid's) role in the team and what plans coach has for developing her.
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Old 09-27-2011, 09:02 PM   #51
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^^^ding ding ding^^
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Old 09-27-2011, 09:26 PM   #52
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Coach came over after the meet tonight. Apparently SG had showed so much improvement in the freestyle at practice, that's why she got those races (and I think she knew in advance the meet would be a walkover). But she was concerned that SG seemed to be taking her post-race coaching as "yelling at her" rather than positive reinforcement and steps for further improvement, and wanted (me) to reinforce that it's just because she gets so excited and sees so much potential and she's impatient for it to bloom that maybe it seems like admonishment........

and it never occurred to coach (until i "joked" about it) that this might be seen as a punishment set for someone who is a sprinter

Tough love, baby.

She told me that SG is a good swimmer now, will be a great swimmer and may well be a super-great swimmer. Which is nice.

btw, she was lagging almost all they way in the 500 and then pulled it out at the last minte to take 4th (and score points). She plowed the 200. Well no, that's not fair, she did drop time, but she should have dropped more because her time was old. Her two relays were good -her medley relay came second.
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Old 09-27-2011, 09:32 PM   #53
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZenGum View Post
The Spanish Inquisition?




Sod that. Let her know that you accept her decision, but would like help understanding your (kid's) role in the team and what plans coach has for developing her.
With this coach, you have to wait until she's ready to tell you (which turns out to have been tonight, sorta) She's a great swim coach, but not so good with the interpersonals and everyone sees that the kids of the parents who piss her off swim less and get less coaching. There comes a point when the swimmer has enough value on the team that you can get away with more as a parent..... but that time isn't as a freshman.

The coach and I actually get on OK -we've been dealing with each other for a few years prior to this -she and I both coach middle school teams and are both in Summer swimming and swimming is a small world. And I've watched unsuspecting parents wade in and their kids suffer as a result.

And they are at the age where they should be starting to fight their own battles. But it's hard sometimes.
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Old 09-28-2011, 09:01 PM   #54
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Quote:
She's a great swim coach, but not so good with the interpersonals
Bit of a shortcoming in a coach, IMHO.

Still, can't be as bad as the twerp who coaches at the tennis courts near the park near my house. I've walked past and seen him yelling at kids who looked about 10. "That was YOURS, Timmy, WHY DIDN'T YOU GET IT? WHY WEREN'T YOU THERE?" etc.

He must be really good at tennis, cause he's a horrible teacher.
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Old 09-28-2011, 09:14 PM   #55
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ya know.... it's only a shortcoming for the parents. And they aren't really important. She sees what is wrong with as stroke an is able to communicate with the swimmer how to fix it. That's what makes a good swim coach. If you can improve any swimmers time in any stroke, that's all you need to be a good swim coach.

There are plenty of coaches out there who are popular because they make nicey with the parents... but they don't know wtf they are doing and their kids may do well, but not as well as they could.
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Old 09-28-2011, 09:26 PM   #56
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Surely there is more to swim coaching than stroke correction. Motivation, focus, long-term development management, etc.
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Old 09-28-2011, 09:28 PM   #57
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So last night's meet was agaianst one of the other two high schools in the city. The one that won State champs several years running. The one whose district was completely fucked up by the new school, resulting in all the best athletes (=rich kids who have received top tuition on travel teams) coming to us.

We slaughtered them. which is nice. kinda. and sad at the same time.... (not so sad though, because this is not the school that SG is zoned for) But what was really nice is that I knew many parents on the other team, and many of them took the time to tell me that they knew SG was a swimmer, but had no idea she was so good! A proud parent moment.
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Old 09-28-2011, 09:30 PM   #58
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZenGum View Post
Surely there is more to swim coaching than stroke correction. Motivation, focus, long-term development management, etc.
yup she's good at that too

she just doesn't play well with parents .....I supect unless they have multiplr state-qualifying swimmers and then they can do s they please......
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Old 09-28-2011, 09:33 PM   #59
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Quote:
Originally Posted by monster View Post
yup she's good at that too
Err, well, if you say so, but it doesn't look that way from here. Meh, I have very limited information. Whatevs.
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Old 09-28-2011, 09:51 PM   #60
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really? That's funny. This coach is awesome. As a coach. One of the reasons for choosing the school (not one of the main reasons, though, the coach at the other school is good too)

She just hasn't "got" my kid yet. And that's why she talked to me after the meet last night. She knew she wasn't connecting quite the way she wnted to. If she could only show this witht he parents too then..... wait.... she wouldn't be coaching high school.....

She's a Team USA caliber coach with personality issues that have her coaching high school and college. I think. Rumor has it she was Phelps' breaststroke coach at one point.... Shew was certainly a CW coach at the right time for that....
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