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Old 05-26-2007, 11:23 AM   #1
HungLikeJesus
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Tidbits

This is from last night. I originally stuck this in another thread for temporary storage, then thought I should start a thread for storing tidbits - little ideas that someone might eventually find a use for.

Feel free to use these ideas, or to add your own.

(I'm putting these in the Cellar instead of on my local hard drive because sometimes when I'm travelling I might want access.)

---

Ignore this
Quote:
I just came back from dinner with my wife and I had two thoughts that I wanted to just stick in here for temporary storage. I hope I'll find a use for them later. This is just for my own reference. Please don't read these.
1) He had hair as white as nuclear winter

2) Darn, I can't remember the second one. Something about... I can picture what I was seeing when I had the thought, but the thought escapes me. There were two guys sitting at the bar, and one of them was putting his arm around himself, from behind. Maybe I'll know in the morning.

Oh yeah, there was a third thing. I was eating peanuts at work and I swear that one of them was, except for it's size, an exact replica of the virgin Mary's left breast. Unfortunately I ate it. But you do believe me, don't you? (meaning me, tomorrow)
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Old 05-26-2007, 09:32 PM   #2
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You idiot, that peanut was probably worth $30k, to the Golden Palace, on ebay.
Sigh... I guess I'll get a crappy birthday gift... again. sigh
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Old 05-29-2007, 10:50 AM   #3
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Take LIVE tuna fish, and FEED 'em mayonnaise! Oh this is great. [speaks into tape recorder]
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Old 05-29-2007, 11:35 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by glatt View Post
Take LIVE tuna fish, and FEED 'em mayonnaise! Oh this is great. [speaks into tape recorder]
Night Shift?
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Old 05-29-2007, 10:48 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by glatt
Take LIVE tuna fish, and FEED 'em mayonnaise!
I... think I just threw up in my mouth a little.
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Old 05-29-2007, 11:06 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by Clodfobble View Post
I... think I just threw up in my mouth a little.
That's funny, because I was just cleaning the kitchen and thinking that mayonnaise looked like something oozing out of a serious burn.
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Old 05-30-2007, 04:51 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Clodfobble View Post
I... think I just threw up in my mouth a little.
So did the fish.
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Old 05-31-2007, 01:55 PM   #8
Shawnee123
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Real actual scholarship essay:

Because I get my work done, and I don't leave anything unfinished.

Real class satisfaction survey:

I didn't learn nothing from this class. I found it repetitive and redundant.


Real career aspiration essay:

I would love to get into the medical assassinating field. (Student used this word twice. Student's last name was not Kevorkian.)

Followed by another student who said:

I know it sounds weird, but I'd really love to sit in on an autopsy.

These are just from the past couple days, IRL, here at my job. Now, do you think my book will be hilarious or what?
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Old 05-31-2007, 02:12 PM   #9
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I'm reviewing 3 grant proposals for Oklahoma State University (e.g. High-Throughput screening and evaluation of filamentous fungi for improved bioconversion enzyme efficiencies).

In the contact information section, I put that I work in the Department of Duplicate Redundancy.
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Old 05-31-2007, 02:20 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HLJ View Post
I'm reviewing 3 grant proposals for Oklahoma State University (e.g. High-Throughput screening and evaluation of filamentous fungi for improved bioconversion enzyme efficiencies).

In the contact information section, I put that I work in the Department of Duplicate Redundancy.
it's the:
Department of Duplicate Redundancy Department
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Old 05-31-2007, 02:35 PM   #11
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Quote:
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it's the:
Department of Duplicate Redundancy Department
Yeah, I ran out of space.

I'm glad to see someone's paying attention.
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Old 05-31-2007, 06:13 PM   #12
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Robert Bradley
Robert Cray
Robert Randolph
Robert Ward
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Old 05-31-2007, 06:23 PM   #13
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calculating errors.


funny.
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Old 05-31-2007, 06:55 PM   #14
HungLikeJesus
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BigV - A hungry mind is an angry mind
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Old 05-31-2007, 07:31 PM   #15
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by your feet and hands...
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