My friend with breast cancer - Page 2

DanaC · 05-18-2009, 01:15 PM

Fuck cancer!

Queen of the Ryche · 05-18-2009, 03:59 PM

Oh, and theat Memory bracelet is seriously creepy. Yours is a beaut Moni.
Did I mention Fuck Cancer?

monster · 05-19-2009, 01:48 PM

it's chemo with definite hair loss followed by a single and possibly double mastectomy. And before all that, another major biopsy and a battery of stinking awful tests. Poor thing. I feel so bad for her. and me. And all of us.

F F F F F

Queen of the Ryche · 05-19-2009, 02:22 PM

My mom's BF is having mastectomy tomorrow, followed by chemo and radation thereafter.
F.C.

limey · 05-20-2009, 03:53 AM

Just dropping in to say FUCK cancer!

TheMercenary · 05-28-2009, 09:22 PM

Been there. Done it. I have a very close friend in hospice care now. He will be dead by next week. In Jan we were sitting in a bar watching the races. My sister died of breast cancer when she was in her early 30's. My MIL died last year. Still no cure.

Hang in there. Sending you good thoughts for your friend and her family.

Trilby · 05-29-2009, 03:32 PM

You know what it is about cancer?

it can just go FUCK ITSELF.

Beestie · 05-29-2009, 06:45 PM

My mother has had two masectomies and three melanomas.

My Mom is still here. The cancer ain't.

Anything stupid enough to mess with Mother Beestie deserves every last ounce of unholy asswhoopin she gave it. You hear that yelping sound fading in the distance? That's cancer.

Pie · 05-29-2009, 07:33 PM

CANCER -- fucked

Bone marrow -- failed
Kidneys -- failed
Liver -- failed
Lungs -- failed
Heart -- failed

T'was the rest of the list that killed my dad.

monster · 06-08-2009, 09:42 AM

so the chemo starts tomorrow, followed by the zillion anti-nausea drugs. She's come a long way since the diagnosis. she's stronger and more ready than she knows to fight this demon. We just spent a couple of hours having coffee, shooting the shit, coming up with creative ways to have fun with cancer.... apparently cancer is like porn to medical professionals -they can't help themselves they all want a feel. She went to her Family Doctor about something else -after she's been through all of the screenings in prep for the chemo- and he's all "well while you're here I'll just listen to your heart and lungs to check everything is still fine" .....well okaaaaaay if you really feel it's necessary ..."oh and now that I'm in your chest area, I might as well have a feel of the lump...... WTF for? weirdo. time for a new doc....

it's a horrible waiting game -not just for the chemo appt tomorrow, but this is a fast course and it still takes 4 months... and then there's the whole surgery beast....

It's not even my cancer, my drama, but I feel the need to share, so thanks for being there, guys.

We're looking into "no, you cannot feel my tumor" shirts as and alternative to the "fuck cancer" ones.

Trilby · 06-08-2009, 10:03 AM

I like that idea, Monnie! NO you CANNOT feel my tumor, asshole!

cute!

what kind of chemo is she going to get? do you know the name?

monster · 06-08-2009, 10:44 AM

No, sorry. I'll find out if I can. Probably the most common run-of-the-mill one as she has the most common-run-of-the-mill cancer -the most "cureable" type.

When she first told me and she was all "I'm not ready to die" I wasn't really sure what to say, I'm not the lovey-dovey-huggy-cry type, so I said (-because I'm the "comic relief" here) well what makes you think you're so special that you have to be in the small percentage that die. Statistically, you'll have chemo, lose your hair, lose a boob or a bit of one and then be back to pretty much normal in a few years". At the time i thought oops, maybe too direct too soon, but today she told me that's really been helping her get a perspective on it, so I have definitely learned that the best way to help your friends deal with this sort of shit is not to change, even if you might seems to have the wrong type of personality for it. If she couldn't handle it, she wouldn't have told me. There are a few extremely sincere, busybody types that she hasn't told because she doen't feel able to handle their reactions. i'm rambling. sorry.

Undertoad · 06-08-2009, 11:25 AM

."oh and now that I'm in your chest area, I might as well have a feel of the lump...... WTF for? weirdo. time for a new doc....

Maybe, but maybe he just doesn't get enough experience in these things. When I last got my prostate checked and pronounced normal, I was tempted to ask the doc how may abnormals she has felt.

monster · 06-08-2009, 11:36 AM

yeah, she suspects that was it, but why couldn't he just have said "hey, would you mind if I examine your lump to help me know what it feels like". All that "routine exam oh and while I'm here i should just check it...." BS. people with cancer don't need that BS. None of us do.

(This was not the doctor who initially referred her for tests -that was her OBGYN)

she also said that it was a medically-driven desire to grop -she could tell her midwife also was desperate for a feel when she was discussing "lumps in other people"

Queen of the Ryche · 06-09-2009, 09:46 AM

I would soooo want you there if I had cancer Mon. As many times as I've been in your position, I finally realized that THAT is exactly why she wants you around, and why you're such a special friend. I tend to use humor to deal with discomfort as well - was told by more than one firend/family member with cancer that it was such a relief after ALL of the "OMG! Are you okay? You can cry on my shoulder, here's a tissue" types.

05-18-2009, 03:59 PM	#17
Queen of the Ryche is fleeing the scene Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Beautiful CO Posts: 1,510	Oh, and theat Memory bracelet is seriously creepy. Yours is a beaut Moni. Did I mention Fuck Cancer? __________________ Once, in an interview, Chuck Norris admitted that he was not the most awesome thing ever. He declined to elaborate; but I believe we all know that he was referring to the existence of chocolate covered bacon. I'd rather be judged by twelve than carried by six.

05-19-2009, 01:48 PM	#18
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	it's chemo with definite hair loss followed by a single and possibly double mastectomy. And before all that, another major biopsy and a battery of stinking awful tests. Poor thing. I feel so bad for her. and me. And all of us. F F F F F __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

05-19-2009, 02:22 PM	#19
Queen of the Ryche is fleeing the scene Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Beautiful CO Posts: 1,510	My mom's BF is having mastectomy tomorrow, followed by chemo and radation thereafter. F.C. __________________ Once, in an interview, Chuck Norris admitted that he was not the most awesome thing ever. He declined to elaborate; but I believe we all know that he was referring to the existence of chocolate covered bacon. I'd rather be judged by twelve than carried by six.

05-20-2009, 03:53 AM	#20
limey Encroaching on your decrees Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland Posts: 7,016	Just dropping in to say FUCK cancer! __________________ Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of

05-28-2009, 09:22 PM	#21
TheMercenary “Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo” Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Savannah, Georgia Posts: 21,393	Been there. Done it. I have a very close friend in hospice care now. He will be dead by next week. In Jan we were sitting in a bar watching the races. My sister died of breast cancer when she was in her early 30's. My MIL died last year. Still no cure. Hang in there. Sending you good thoughts for your friend and her family. __________________ Anyone but the this most fuked up President in History in 2012!

05-29-2009, 03:32 PM	#22
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	You know what it is about cancer? it can just go FUCK ITSELF. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

05-29-2009, 06:45 PM	#23
Beestie -◊\|≡·∙■·∙≡\|◊- Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Parts unknown. Posts: 4,081	My mother has had two masectomies and three melanomas. My Mom is still here. The cancer ain't. Anything stupid enough to mess with Mother Beestie deserves every last ounce of unholy asswhoopin she gave it. You hear that yelping sound fading in the distance? That's cancer. __________________ ♠ ♥ ♣ ♦

05-29-2009, 07:33 PM	#24
Pie Gone and done Join Date: Sep 2001 Posts: 4,808	CANCER -- fucked Bone marrow -- failed Kidneys -- failed Liver -- failed Lungs -- failed Heart -- failed T'was the rest of the list that killed my dad. __________________ per·son \ˈpər-sən\ (noun) - an ephemeral collection of small, irrational decisions The fun thing about evolution (and science in general) is that it happens whether you believe in it or not.

06-08-2009, 09:42 AM	#25
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	so the chemo starts tomorrow, followed by the zillion anti-nausea drugs. She's come a long way since the diagnosis. she's stronger and more ready than she knows to fight this demon. We just spent a couple of hours having coffee, shooting the shit, coming up with creative ways to have fun with cancer.... apparently cancer is like porn to medical professionals -they can't help themselves they all want a feel. She went to her Family Doctor about something else -after she's been through all of the screenings in prep for the chemo- and he's all "well while you're here I'll just listen to your heart and lungs to check everything is still fine" .....well okaaaaaay if you really feel it's necessary ..."oh and now that I'm in your chest area, I might as well have a feel of the lump...... WTF for? weirdo. time for a new doc.... it's a horrible waiting game -not just for the chemo appt tomorrow, but this is a fast course and it still takes 4 months... and then there's the whole surgery beast.... It's not even my cancer, my drama, but I feel the need to share, so thanks for being there, guys. We're looking into "no, you cannot feel my tumor" shirts as and alternative to the "fuck cancer" ones. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

06-08-2009, 10:03 AM	#26
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	I like that idea, Monnie! NO you CANNOT feel my tumor, asshole! cute! what kind of chemo is she going to get? do you know the name? __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

06-08-2009, 10:44 AM	#27
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	No, sorry. I'll find out if I can. Probably the most common run-of-the-mill one as she has the most common-run-of-the-mill cancer -the most "cureable" type. When she first told me and she was all "I'm not ready to die" I wasn't really sure what to say, I'm not the lovey-dovey-huggy-cry type, so I said (-because I'm the "comic relief" here) well what makes you think you're so special that you have to be in the small percentage that die. Statistically, you'll have chemo, lose your hair, lose a boob or a bit of one and then be back to pretty much normal in a few years". At the time i thought oops, maybe too direct too soon, but today she told me that's really been helping her get a perspective on it, so I have definitely learned that the best way to help your friends deal with this sort of shit is not to change, even if you might seems to have the wrong type of personality for it. If she couldn't handle it, she wouldn't have told me. There are a few extremely sincere, busybody types that she hasn't told because she doen't feel able to handle their reactions. i'm rambling. sorry. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

06-08-2009, 11:25 AM	#28
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	."oh and now that I'm in your chest area, I might as well have a feel of the lump...... WTF for? weirdo. time for a new doc.... Maybe, but maybe he just doesn't get enough experience in these things. When I last got my prostate checked and pronounced normal, I was tempted to ask the doc how may abnormals she has felt.

06-08-2009, 11:36 AM	#29
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	yeah, she suspects that was it, but why couldn't he just have said "hey, would you mind if I examine your lump to help me know what it feels like". All that "routine exam oh and while I'm here i should just check it...." BS. people with cancer don't need that BS. None of us do. (This was not the doctor who initially referred her for tests -that was her OBGYN) she also said that it was a medically-driven desire to grop -she could tell her midwife also was desperate for a feel when she was discussing "lumps in other people" __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

06-09-2009, 09:46 AM	#30
Queen of the Ryche is fleeing the scene Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Beautiful CO Posts: 1,510	I would soooo want you there if I had cancer Mon. As many times as I've been in your position, I finally realized that THAT is exactly why she wants you around, and why you're such a special friend. I tend to use humor to deal with discomfort as well - was told by more than one firend/family member with cancer that it was such a relief after ALL of the "OMG! Are you okay? You can cry on my shoulder, here's a tissue" types. __________________ Once, in an interview, Chuck Norris admitted that he was not the most awesome thing ever. He declined to elaborate; but I believe we all know that he was referring to the existence of chocolate covered bacon. I'd rather be judged by twelve than carried by six.

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