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Old 07-16-2013, 02:13 AM   #16
Chocolatl
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Maybe try checking out meetup.com to see if there are any groups you'd be interested in? I haven't gone to any myself, but I have some friends who have joined groups and found some good company.
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Old 07-16-2013, 05:37 AM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Perry Winkle View Post
How about clubs? There are things like walking clubs so you could combine your fitness goals with socializing. That (running club) is really what helped me build my social groups here.
I like this. My FiL, before he got remarried, was very active in the local hiking club and English Country Dance. Some bike shops run group rides which are leveled by ability. There are cycling clubs but they tend to lean competitive. I bet there are similar options around you.
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Old 07-16-2013, 08:24 AM   #18
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I second meetup.com as a place to find such clubs. There is every topic/hobby/specialty that you can think of, in every neighborhood.
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Old 07-16-2013, 10:16 PM   #19
John Adams
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Indoor Climbing.
You'll get fit and get to know people. Completely clears your mind while you are doing it.
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Old 07-17-2013, 11:34 PM   #20
bbro
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So, here is what I have done. I looked at some Meetup.com places that seem like a good fit, but then, anxiety crippled me. I reached out to someone that would understand and asked if she would come with me. She agreed and said she was proud of me and agreed that it would be good for me. She is the first I thought of to ask and she did come through. With that, I realized, I may not have day to day people, but when it really matters, I have those that care.

I also just emailed the counselor asking for more details and saying that I need some help and I would like to talk to her first.

I am making strides, right?

PS - I am still terrified of all of it.
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Old 07-18-2013, 12:00 AM   #21
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Yeah, but it's kind of a good terror, like your first roller coaster terror.
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Old 07-18-2013, 01:30 AM   #22
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Definitely strides, WTG!
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Old 07-18-2013, 01:36 AM   #23
Chocolatl
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Hooray! Good luck, bbro. I hope it's a good experience for you.
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Old 07-20-2013, 10:04 PM   #24
bbro
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Status - I have yet to hear from the counselor, and I am about to express my displeasure.

I am still looking at the meetup clubs.

Thank you so much for all the encouragement. You have no idea how much it helps.
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Old 07-23-2013, 12:17 AM   #25
bbro
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I expressed my displeasure to her and I have still gotten no response. Since I like her ideals, I am thinking of seeing if I can find out who her therapist is.

Bruce - I know you were kind of joking, but for me, it is not a good terror. It is a crippling one.

I have not yet joined a meetup club.......yet.

I also have not given up yet. I am still scared and I hope to find a responsive therapist to talk to first before going to a club meeting.

I admit, I am crying now because I am scared. Do I have the strength to reach out to another therapist after being rejected? Do I have enough strength to actually join a meet up and follow through?

I wonder if I should have done this anonymously.

I know it is easy to say just do it. Get out there and have fun, but to me it isn't fun.

But I did promise that I would try. I am terrified, but I will try. For you. And for me.

PS - I would love a hug if anyone is in NC
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Last edited by bbro; 07-23-2013 at 12:23 AM.
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Old 07-23-2013, 02:39 AM   #26
Chocolatl
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Aww, bbro. I'm sorry to hear you're having trouble getting in touch with the therapist.

I know what you mean about the feeling that things are easier said than done.

Keep Moving Forward. Sometimes that will be big strides, and sometimes it'll be a little shuffle. And sometimes, it'll be pausing to catch your breath before continuing on.
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Old 09-23-2013, 07:25 PM   #27
bbro
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It's been a while - I figured I would update. I never did get a therapist. I noticed a huge difference and couldn't figure out what the change was. Realized that I haven't taken any birth control for a while. I am going to ask my doctor about it the next time but I think it might have a huge difference. I still get down sometimes, but not like before and not as often. I've maybe had one or two bad days since last posting.

I've actually taken some steps to get healthier. Including joining a great kettlebell gym.....even though I hurt my shoulder already - lol.
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Old 09-24-2013, 05:46 AM   #28
Griff
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Glad to hear you're making progress bbro. Is that a common side-effect?
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Old 09-24-2013, 12:35 PM   #29
bbro
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Aw FFS, I had a whole big response written and it got spoofed (not by cellar).

Griff - I think so. I googled it and it seems to be a lesser known one. I am going to talk to my doctor because I want to confirm that, but I hope (REALLY HOPE) that I will be having sex again at some point and need a replacement.

When I was looking back over what could have caused the change, this was the only significant change that I made.
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