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Old 10-02-2012, 03:00 PM   #1
henry quirk
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Screw food...

...gimme coffee and cigarettes.
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Old 10-02-2012, 03:22 PM   #2
footfootfoot
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I thought screw food was oysters and ginseng. What have I been missing out on?
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Old 10-02-2012, 03:48 PM   #3
henry quirk
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HA!
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Old 10-03-2012, 04:03 PM   #4
Gravdigr
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I thought screw food was microwave burritos and Wild Turkey?
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Old 10-03-2012, 04:05 PM   #5
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Scratch that...I think pot, Wild Turkey, then Waffle House...now that's screw food!
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Old 10-03-2012, 07:26 PM   #6
ZenGum
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So I was having a party, and decided to make it a theme party, and sent out the invitations to say it was a "mood party". Guests were to come dressed as some kind of mood.

So all was going well until two of my Pakistani* friends turned up. They were both naked. One was holding a bowl of custard so that his dick drooped into it, and the other had made a hole in a pear and put his dick through it.

"What the hell moods are you two?" I asked.

"I am deep in despair" said one.

"Yeah, and I am fucking disgusted"


* The accent is necessary for the joke. It could have been Indian, but this joke was originally told to me by a Pakistani.
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Old 10-03-2012, 09:10 PM   #7
footfootfoot
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So sorry, I thought you said, "Goats."
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Old 10-04-2012, 01:54 AM   #8
Sundae
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Would've worked with Jamaicans too.
Although I suspect one if them would've been fucking dis beercan.
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Old 10-04-2012, 02:18 AM   #9
ZenGum
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I'm not sure that's a mood.

And I know exactly to which arrow of desire your signature line refers, and what you intend to do with it when it is brought.
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Old 10-04-2012, 02:27 PM   #10
Sundae
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The mood would have been longing. So there.

If you do know what I am referring to in my sig, you will know it's not actually Arrow I desire
I suspect you have it right though. Being a smart chap and me being relentlessly predictable.
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Old 10-08-2012, 02:49 PM   #11
BigV
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZenGum View Post
So I was having a party, and decided to make it a theme party, and sent out the invitations to say it was a "mood party". Guests were to come dressed as some kind of mood.

So all was going well until two of my Pakistani* friends turned up. They were both naked. One was holding a bowl of custard so that his dick drooped into it, and the other had made a hole in a pear and put his dick through it.

"What the hell moods are you two?" I asked.

"Yeah, and I am fucking disgusted"

"I am deep in despair" said one.


* The accent is necessary for the joke. It could have been Indian, but this joke was originally told to me by a Pakistani.
FTFY.

yeesh.
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Old 10-08-2012, 02:59 PM   #12
infinite monkey
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BigV View Post
FTFY.

yeesh.
Huh?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ZenGum
So I was having a party, and decided to make it a theme party, and sent out the invitations to say it was a "mood party". Guests were to come dressed as some kind of mood.

So all was going well until two of my Pakistani* friends turned up. They were both naked. One was holding a bowl of custard so that his dick drooped into it, and the other had made a hole in a pear and put his dick through it.

"What the hell moods are you two?" I asked.

"Yeah, and I am fucking disgusted"

"I am deep in despair" said one.


* The accent is necessary for the joke. It could have been Indian, but this joke was originally told to me by a Pakistani.
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Old 10-08-2012, 03:13 PM   #13
footfootfoot
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Goddamn lousy rain!
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