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Old 05-08-2006, 11:24 AM   #16
Trilby
Slattern of the Swail
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 15,654
I appreciate the link, Kitsune, but I have to say, I think it's bullshit. I KNOW prayer works. Just like I know glucosamine chondroitin and magnets help my aching joints! I'm a pragmatist: Whatever works, works! Mental attitude is sooo important. Mental attitude can save you.
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In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic.

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—James Barrie


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Old 05-08-2006, 11:54 AM   #17
xoxoxoBruce
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Kitsune, that's because the pray-er has to know and care about the pray-ee. Otherwise, rich people would be taking all of God's healing for themselves.
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Old 05-08-2006, 12:15 PM   #18
Happy Monkey
I think this line's mostly filler.
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brianna
I appreciate the link, Kitsune, but I have to say, I think it's bullshit. I KNOW prayer works. Just like I know glucosamine chondroitin and magnets help my aching joints! I'm a pragmatist: Whatever works, works! Mental attitude is sooo important. Mental attitude can save you.
Right. It's called placebo...
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Old 05-08-2006, 12:30 PM   #19
Trilby
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 15,654
Quote:
Originally Posted by Happy Monkey
Right. It's called placebo...
Placebo's WORK. That's why they're called 'placebo'.
__________________
In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic.

"Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her.
—James Barrie


Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum
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Old 05-08-2006, 01:33 PM   #20
Happy Monkey
I think this line's mostly filler.
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Posts: 13,575
As long as you don't placebo away symptoms of a serious problem.
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|...............| We live in the nick of times.
| Len 17, Wid 3 |
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Old 05-08-2006, 01:43 PM   #21
Trilby
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 15,654
Quote:
Originally Posted by Happy Monkey
As long as you don't placebo away symptoms of a serious problem.
What do you think I've been doing?
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In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic.

"Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her.
—James Barrie


Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum
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Old 05-08-2006, 10:30 PM   #22
Kagen4o4
The Sheriff of Nothingland
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Melbourne, Aus
Posts: 1,794
"where do we get these placebos?"
"maybe theres some in this truck!"
"im cured! i mean, OWW!"
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something we both can enjoy??
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Old 10-07-2006, 11:24 PM   #23
nglskq
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 2
hello all man
thank you so much for you all give me care
I am a poor boy, as a result of mine family impoverished, my 17 years old started the work, my family has the daddy, mother, the younger brother and I, my income must maintain the family the life and younger brother's school expense, because is impoverished, I must extremely thrifty province.
However, last year my younger brother body was uncomfortable, finally diagnosed for the liver cancer,My family now extremely is pitiful, I was in the family the only
income, I simply cannot pay younger brother's treatment expense and
the family huge debt, I do not have other choices, I once sought help
in the network.
please you to use the googel search my e-mail: jznglskq@yahoo.com.cn
you will see my Message on the Internet,When you read my message. i tell you:
first i want tell you my english is poor,You saw the message is I uses the computer translation(chinese to english),is:
http://freetranslation.paralink.com
you now certainly have very many questions, you think:
1:Since you need others' help, how then you can richly access the net? How can you have the computer?
(i tell you:I am in the small company's staffs, I go to work, I can the secretly use company's computer, when I rest, I can use friend of mine.)
2:You cannot change the present situation through the work?
I extremely want like this, but even if I diligently work, I also only have theabout 20,000 Renminbi salaries (to be most) every year, but our family debt is the about 70,000 Renminbi (also can increase, because of mine younger brother), the house also must relocate, buys the house to have about the about 80,000 Renminbi, I am in the family the only source of income, how if you are my you can do? The reality is very brutal, the destiny lets you change not helps with helpless. Very many people saw my message contacts for me, they ridicule me, but I believed one day can some people be willing to help me, perhaps you also felt I am a fool or am a swindler.
As a result of the remote distance, I am unable to you to prove any, but I want to ask you to think: If a person were not arrived reached end of rope, he why wants to do this?
i am at that netbar do working,
I am a hardware manager.
My 17 years old graduate a professional institute which saves to us,
my specialty is a computer, afterwards I had diligently to work,
because of mine younger brother and the family, I has gone to Beijing
and Guangdong Province Foshan, afterwards my younger brother was sick,
I had to return to my hometown, I had found the present work in this
internet bar. I really very painful, because I felt oneself is very
incompetent, I cannot rescue me the younger brother, I cannot change
the oneself family the destiny. Did you think I am willing to look
like the beggar equally everywhere message like this? I also have the
self-respect, but I have the means?

You knew Chinese the government is despotic and the incompetent
organization, therefore I only have mine hope repose in the freedom
and the democracy country: US'S network.
Although I in network message, but until now I still have not obtained
the help, I have to arrive others' ridicule, now I finally understood:
Even if the people believed I am real, they cannot help me, because
this is our world.
Therefore I stopped in the network the message, I decided through own
diligently works changes my family destiny, therefore I want to go to
Japan or Australia work through China's work intermediary company, if
I can go to there, I can change my family destiny through own salary,
but I simply do not have the money payment intermediary expense.
If your organization has the branch in China, may let them arrive my
family, they can prove I am real.
I accidentally discovered your website, I felt perhaps you can help
me, I to know has more people in this world to need to help, for
instance Africa's refugees. My procedure very is perhaps absurd,
perhaps I seek help do not belong to your service, but I still hoped
you can help me, your help to be able to change our destiny.
I believe "i am not alone", I believe god with me.
Thank you so much!
Wu zhen qiang ( a Chinese)
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Old 10-07-2006, 11:49 PM   #24
lumberjim
I can hear my ears
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 25,571
this is the guy that writes those spam mails i get.
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Old 10-08-2006, 08:45 PM   #25
wolf
lobber of scimitars
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Phila Burbs
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I like it better than the website by that chick that maxed out her credit cards and whined her way out of debt.
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Old 10-09-2006, 11:56 PM   #26
Crimson Ghost
Larger than life and twice as ugly.
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
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A message like this must be responded to in kind -

--------------------

DEAR SIR/MADAM,

THIS IS A PERSONAL EMAIL T0 YOU ONLY. I AM THE SON OF SPAM SPADE, THE FORMER LOAN OFFICER OF NIGERIA, WHO WAS KILLED BY A RUSSIAN LADY WHO WANTS TO MEET YOU. HIS MORTGAGE RATES WERE SUPERB, BUT HIS PENIS WAS TOO SHORT, SO HE ORDERED 60,000,000 VIAGRA PILLS AND BEFORE HE COULD TAKE THEM HE WAS ASSASINATED BY 5 MILLION EMAIL ADDRESSES AT NO COST TO YOU. NOW I HAVE THESE 60 MILLION VIAGRA PILLS AND SEEK YOUR HELP IN TRANSFERING THEM TO YOUR ACCOUNT.

I AM USING THIS MEDIUM T0 REACH YOU. HOWEVER I HAVE NO OTHER CHOICE AND THIS IS STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL, YOUR CO-OPERATION IS NECESSARY. YOUR RESUME WAS SELECTED AS BEING HIGHLY QUALIFIED, BUT THIS IS NOT SPAM! THIS IS FREEDOM FROM DEBT - CUT YOUR MORTGAGE IN HALF WITH OUR AMAZING REMOTE-CONTROL PASTA POT. THIS OFFER IS FREE. YOU HAVE NO OBLIGATION TO DELETE IT AT ANY TIME.

Y0UR PILLS ARE BEING HELD IN AN INEXPENSIVE DIGITAL CABLE DESCRAMBLER BOX GUARDED BY TEENY TITS CARRYING EXPLOSIVE LOADS. THE LOWEST RATES ARE LOCKED IN, ALONG WITH YOUR FREE GIFT. THESE PILLS MUST BE TRANSFERED TO YOUR ACCOUNT USING A HAND-HELD ORGANIZER WHICH MAY BE OBTAINED FROM A FREE GOVERNMENT-AUCTION WEB SITE. BY VIEWING PHOTOS OF SINGLES IN YOUR AREA, INCLUDING HORNY WIVES, YOU CAN LOOK YOUNGER, LOSE WEIGHT, AND INCREASE YOUR STAMINA WHILE DRIVING PRE-QUALIFIED CUSTOMERS TO YOUR MULTILEVEL PROGRAM AND MAKE OVER $4000 PER MONTH GUARANTEED. THESE PILLS WILL NOT ONLY MAKE YOU LOOK 3" LONGER, THEY WILL GET RID OF YOUR FLEAS AND TICKS FOR GOOD! SIMPLY COPY ANY DVD TO YOUR FREE INTERNET DOMAIN AND BEGIN YOUR ANTI-AGING PROGRAM TODAY.

THE PLAN IS SIMPLE. Y0U WILL USE NORTON SYSTEMWORKS (A $300 VALUE FOR ONLY $38.95) TO PURCHASE 37 MILLION SHARES OF TONER CORP STOCK. THEN YOU WILL MEET ME AT THE WORLD'S SMALLEST DIGITAL CAMERA WITH $30,000 IN CORAL CALCIUM. WARNING: DO NOT TAKE ANY HUMAN GROWTH HORMONE OR YOU WILL NOT QUALIFY FOR YOUR FREE GIFT. ONCE YOU RECONNECT WITH YOUR HIGH-SCHOOL FRIENDS, YOUR FREE CREDIT REPORT WILL BE SENT. WITH THIS REPORT, YOU CAN BUILD YOUR OWN ONLINE CASINO. ONCE INSIDE THE CASINO, YOU WILL SUBSCRIBE TO KARA'S FREE FAN CLUB, WHERE YOU WILL BE ENTERED IN A DRAWING TO PROTECT YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM. DO NOT FAIL TO DO THIS, OR I WILL REDUCE THE SIZE OF YOUR PENIS BY THREE INCHES! KARA'S WEB SITE WILL POP UP 6,000 PAGES, ALL OF WHICH YOU WILL HAVE TO CLOSE BY CLICKING THEM. FOR EACH ONE YOU CLICK, TWO MORE WILL APPEAR. AFTER YOU COMPLETE YOUR ONLINE DEGREE (IN 8 MONTHS OR LESS), I WILL SEND YOU A HOT AMATEUR MP3 THAT WILL CONSOLIDATE YOUR DEBT USING ONLINE AUCTIONS. NOT EVEN CNN, CBS, ABC, NBC, OR OPRAH WILL KNOW OUR SECRET!

N0W Y0U WILL BE READY TO RECEIVE THE PILLS. YOU WILL USE THE AUCTION SITE TO FIRE YOUR BOSS AND CLAIM YOUR PORTABLE DVD PLAYER FROM THE SECRET ANTI-WRINKLE AGENT. NEXT, BOOST YOUR CELLULAR RECEPTION AND DRIVE OUR TEENY LOLITAS WILD WITH HUMAN PHEROMONES MADE FROM PRE-OWNED INKJET CARTRIDGES. YOU WILL TRADE THE PHEROMONES FOR A SINGLE GEORGE FOREMAN GRILL FILLED WITH A FREE THIRTY-DAY SUPPLY, WHICH WILL ENLARGE YOUR PACKAGE EVEN FURTHER. THE HERBAL INGREDIENTS IN THIS PACKAGE WILL INCREASE YOUR REVENUE PROJECTIONS BY 3" AND CLEAN THE INNER WALLS OF YOUR INTESTINES. REMEMBER, THIS IS NOT A SLEEP REMEDY, THIS AMAZING PRODUCT TARGETS THE BACTERIA THAT ACTUALLY CAUSE SNORING!

0UR PSYCHICS ARE STANDING BY TO TAKE YOUR ORDER. GIVE THEM YOUR CREDIT CARD NUMBER AND WAIT FOR THE BEEP. YOU WILL BE GIVEN THE ULTIMATE SCIENTIFIC BREAKTHROUGH AND A FREE CREDIT CHECK. DEPOSIT THIS CHECK IN A PRE-APPROVED ACCOUNT, AND YOU WILL TAKE HOME 40% OF THE PILLS.

THIS IS A VERY SIMPLE TRANSACTION. THE RESULTS ARE GUARANTEED. THIS IS A COMPLETELY SECURE INVESTMENT. I HOPE YOU WILL HELP ME AND MY FAMILY AS WE ARE IN DESPERATE NEED. PLEASE REPLY ASAP.

SINCERELY,

S0N OF SPAM
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We must all go through a rite of passage. It must be physical, it must be painful, and it must leave a mark.

I have no knowledge of the events which you are describing, and if I did have knowledge of them,
I would be unable to discuss them with you now or at any future period.



Don't waste your time always searching for those wasted years
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Old 10-10-2006, 10:05 AM   #27
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
Dude!

Very, very funny. I think it's HoF quality work, but I can't credit you with authorship. Full credit for the belly laughs, however!
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Old 10-10-2006, 10:10 AM   #28
mrnoodle
bent
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: under the weather
Posts: 2,656
This guy has been here before, hasn't he? Last spring sometime?
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Old 10-10-2006, 10:57 AM   #29
Clodfobble
UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
Who, nglskq? Yeah, first post in this thread--that is, he bothered to dig up his own spam thread from the archives just to add an almost identical message to the end of it. Weirdo.
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Old 10-10-2006, 11:06 AM   #30
mrnoodle
bent
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
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Posts: 2,656
ohhh.....

duh. i gotta start reading the original posts.
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