Can't Stand her!

[freshnesschronic]

Hey Cellar

How are you all? I remember when I first logged on I was a freshman--now I'm an incoming senior in college. Dang!

Anyways I have a rant, if you want to read it.

So I have an internship with my city's park district, which is like the city recreation and activities board (park districts are prevalent in Illinois). I do loose ends, contacting, booking, communicating with other companies and with the other program managers at the park district. But I also run my own program. It's a one day a week event, let's call it "Fun Days," for 5 weeks, so 5 sessions. Essentially I take kids 4-10 years old (maybe 40 of them?) and entertain them from 9 am until 12:30pm, one day a week. But I don't actually operate/execute it, I'm the administrator. I plan, organize and oversee it. I have my own high school kid staff under me (which is pretty cool! haha) to run it. I get most of my staff from this one lady, let's call her Betty.

Betty is one of those types who knows everything. And let's you know she knows everything. She's a teacher and teaches during the day, and comes to the administrative office after teaching and bothers the program managers and me.

I know this-I'm an intern. I'm new to the field of parks, recreation, sports management. Yes I'm new. Thank you. But I'm NOT a dumbass. I worked with kids before at my internship last year directly teaching them golf. I can handle kids and I know how they function. So today at the end of work (like an hour ago) I tell Betty I've contacted and set up a meeting for most of her staff she referred to me. And that's all I could actually work in. She goes on a half hour lecture to me of oh ok, this is how the meeting should go::::::You did that? No no no, you can't do that. You're not having an orientation? The kids are just stopping by for 10 minutes? You're not paying them? Oh no no no no. What ideas do you have? What sports are they playing? Oh you should do this game. And this activity! Especially this one. Oh this one is good too. Are you doing this? I have a great idea for that. I have a great idea for this too! Why don't you schedule your meeting for before mine? You don't want to call back the kids? I call 30 people in an hour! These are great kids. My kids. They'll be fine. They should do this. You should do that. Reschedule their meeting--I have a meeting next Thursday they have to come to! They can't go to yours. Change it. Hey this is a great game! This is how you do it.



More or less, she attempted to tell me every possible way to play kickball variants.

Now I know I'm new--but I'm not a dumbass. It was like she wanted to run MY program, designated to me from the Superintendent of Recreation, my boss. She told me how to do my meetings, she told me what things I should play---and she has no relation to this at all except she offered a lot of her staff to work for me. I appreciate her willingness to help and suggest. But enough was enough. I was told to administer this and I'm going to damnit. Not because I don't need her help. But because I know I can do it--I'm the freaking intern who needs to impress.

Sorry, that's all.
/end work rant

[Nirvana]

Why thank you "Betty" for all your suggestions and input. If I decide to implement your ideas I will let you know. >giant smile<

[TheMercenary]

If she is not your boss you can just smile at her, nod in agreement like you buy her BS, and then just go off and do what ever you want. You sound like you have some great ideas of your own and you should be allowed to carry them through.

She sounds like a mess. But you know, you are going to meet people just like her for the rest of your life. They are everywhere. The key is not to get stuck in a job where that person (male or female) is your boss. Good luck.

[SteveDallas]

You have met your first micromanager. She won't be your last.

I would suggest, TACTFULLY, speaking to one of the program managers about her. Something like... "Hey, Fred... Betty just gave me a lot of suggestions about dealing with the high school students. I was just wondering if there's anything specific we're required to do with them or what." (Make up your own; I don't know enough to give you a good one.)

If you're lucky, a straight line like this will result in one of two responses and give you a good idea of how to proceed:

• Oh, yeah, that Betty is great... I tell ya, we couldn't run this program without her
• Yeah, she's really a pain in the ass isn't she? We have to humor her, but don't worry about all the stuff she tells you.

[lookout123]

LJ should be along shortly with his input. I'll wait until then.

[freshnesschronic]

Why wait? It's only gonna be like:

Fresh sucks COCK. And at life. I heard Home Depot is hiring...

Do you have any good suggestions, sir? I'm a growing intern I'm here to absorb!

[classicman]

Fresh, Nirvana NAILED IT! Reread her post and think of a way to incorporate it in your next "discussion" with her.

[Beestie]

I would present both your ideas and Betty's ideas to your boss and let your boss help you decide. He/she might give you some insights as to why Betty made those recommendations which would be good for you to know regardless of whether or not you implement them.

When you talk to your Boss, I'd mention that 'you and Betty talked' and that you would like to present two different plans and request his/her input. That way you can't be accused of stealing Betty's ideas but you don't specifically spell out which plan/ideas are yours and which ones are from Betty.

Then, after you finalize the plan, go back to Betty and say... "I discussed our ideas with the boss and he told me to do it this way. Thank you for your input and suggestions."

In her own clumsy way, Betty is just trying to be helpful and trying to keep you from making a mistake (in her eyes, at least). Make the most of it but don't do anything to alienate her.

You will gain priceless experience navigating through political channels which, honestly, may be more helpful in the long run than the experience you will gain from planning the event.

Just stay calm, don't panic and when in doubt, go with Betty's idea. If it doesn't work out you can always indicate tactfully that it was stronly recommended that you do it this way and that you went against your own judgement and did it that way to aviod stepping on Betty's toes. You're an intern - no one will blame you if you go Betty's way. But, if you go your way and things don't work out, you are on your own so be sure that you have the boss's blessing if you do so that you have all 4 outcomes covered (Betty's way + FAIL; Betty's way + WIN; Your way + FAIL; Your way + WIN).

Good luck and don't hesitate to ask questions here. No question is a dumb question unless you fail to ask it.

[limey]

Beestie's way, though complex, looks good to me.

[lookout123]

Beestie's is, by far, the best way to deal with this. That is a lesson that is usually learned through a number of very avoidable office politics mis-steps. Use his experience as your own, fresh.

[monster]

Betty may have a couple of points, just an overbearing way of making them. Like high school kids want to be paid. And they don't want to come to two meetings if they could be combined into one. Sure they'll do it because they want the gig, but the may like you more and be more "there" for you later on if you don't summons them in for an unpaid 10 minute meeting when you could have added it to a paid one they already have to attend.

[ZenGum]

Bitchslap.

[Dingleschmutz]

Whenever she's talking, close your eyes and put on a smug smile, trying to look like you're getting the best beej of your life. When she starts getting really worked up, parse your lips and start breathing heavier. When she stops, open your eyes and look sad until she starts talking again. Repeat as necessary.

[TheMercenary]

So how did it turn out? What did you do or say to get some resolution?
/curious/