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Old 04-07-2009, 11:09 AM   #16
xoxoxoBruce
The future is unwritten
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
I was late because the Hobo was faster than most.
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Old 04-07-2009, 11:53 AM   #17
Sheldonrs
Master Dwellar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 4,412
Quote:
Originally Posted by Queen of the Ryche View Post
Wow Shel, you sure are anal.
That too.
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Old 04-07-2009, 11:56 AM   #18
Queen of the Ryche
is fleeing the scene
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Beautiful CO
Posts: 1,510
So I gues you don't dick around when you're getting ready for work in the morning?
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Once, in an interview, Chuck Norris admitted that he was not the most awesome thing ever.
He declined to elaborate; but I believe we all know that he was referring to the existence of chocolate covered bacon.

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Old 04-07-2009, 12:53 PM   #19
classicman
barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy.
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 23,401
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shawnee123 View Post
I was late because there were a bunch of Hobos on the interstate and I had to stop and kill a few of them.
Fixed that for ya...
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Old 04-07-2009, 01:04 PM   #20
footfootfoot
To shreds, you say?
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet!
Posts: 18,449
"I have an eye problem. I just can't see myself coming to work today."

Actually had a cow orker call in to say her boyfriend fucked her so hard the night before she couldn't walk.

We were more amazed that she found a guy to fuck her in the first place (or anyplace else for that matter) than we were that she used that excuse.
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Old 04-07-2009, 01:07 PM   #21
Pie
Gone and done
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 4,808

I was out celebrating Vermont's legalization of gay marriage.
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per·son \ˈpər-sən\ (noun) - an ephemeral collection of small, irrational decisions
The fun thing about evolution (and science in general) is that it happens whether you believe in it or not.
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Old 04-07-2009, 01:08 PM   #22
Nirvana
Back in 10
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 3,684
The only response I get if I am late for work is ... "Moo?" Occasionally it is "Moo Moo Moo!!!" And if I am lucky they make me a pie....
Um nothing at all like the Pie above
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Last edited by Nirvana; 04-07-2009 at 01:10 PM. Reason: Pie posted
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Old 04-07-2009, 01:19 PM   #23
SteveDallas
Your Bartender
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Philly Burbs, PA
Posts: 7,651
Well I had to either refill my happy pills or buy some more ammo. It turned out the drugstore wasn't open yet.
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Old 04-07-2009, 03:03 PM   #24
Happy Monkey
I think this line's mostly filler.
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: DC
Posts: 13,575
My usual route is only open after 10:00am.
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|...............| We live in the nick of times.
| Len 17, Wid 3 |
|_______________| [pics]
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Old 04-07-2009, 03:28 PM   #25
glatt
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 27,717
Motorcade.
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Old 04-07-2009, 03:57 PM   #26
Pie
Gone and done
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 4,808
funeral procession?
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per·son \ˈpər-sən\ (noun) - an ephemeral collection of small, irrational decisions
The fun thing about evolution (and science in general) is that it happens whether you believe in it or not.
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Old 04-07-2009, 04:22 PM   #27
LabRat
twatfaced two legged bumhole
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,143
The interstate was closed because there was a pig on the loose.
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Old 04-07-2009, 04:45 PM   #28
Undertoad
Radical Centrist
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Cottage of Prussia
Posts: 31,423
I was playing online poker and it would have been rude to stop and not let my tablemates have a chance at winning something back.
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Old 04-07-2009, 05:48 PM   #29
limey
Encroaching on your decrees
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland
Posts: 7,016
There was a tree down across the road and the detour is 30 miles ... [actually I rather foolishly drove the car under the tree ...] ....
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Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of
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Old 04-07-2009, 07:59 PM   #30
SteveDallas
Your Bartender
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Philly Burbs, PA
Posts: 7,651
I was playing online poker and some asshole from Valley Forge National Park was winning all my money.

(Note: In reality this is no excuse. Just play poker from work.)
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