I Write Lewd Parody Music in My Head

Elspode · 07-18-2010, 04:02 PM

...and I'll bet you do, too. So, share it, already! It doesn't have to be a complete composition, but you should include enough lyrics to help us laugh out loud, and, of course, the song that you are using for the tune should be noted.

Let me throw out the first example. Sing this to the tune of "Jesus Loves Me" :

"Jesus loves me, more than you
I'm a Christian, you're a Jew.
Being Jewish breaks his heart
You heathen bastard, worthless fart."

I have more. You do too.

Elspode · 07-18-2010, 04:05 PM

To the tune of "Strangers in the Night":

"Strangers in my shorts, there uninvited,
Strangers in my shorts, I fear I'm blighted"...

Add your own. Fun for the whole family. Young children are particularly good at this.

squirell nutkin · 07-18-2010, 08:57 PM

Put your gland in the hand of the man that stilled the waters...

monster · 07-18-2010, 08:59 PM

I didn't make this one up, but I do enjoy:

Leprosy, bits keep dropping off of me
I'm only half the man I used to be
Since I contracted Leprosy

(To Yesterday)

Cicero · 07-18-2010, 10:24 PM

LOL! I agree. Sometimes I also write horrible limericks in my head too. It's all true. Sometimes I write entire songs that are not parodies either..like:
"I Smell Like Gasoline"
and
Varieties of
"Parking Lot Hooker"
The lyrics and rhyming scheme change depending on my humour.

Shawnee123 · 07-19-2010, 07:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Elspode

To the tune of "Strangers in the Night":

"Strangers in my shorts, there uninvited,
Strangers in my shorts, I fear I'm blighted"...

Add your own. Fun for the whole family. Young children are particularly good at this.

From kid-time:

Strangers in the night, exchanging rubbers
This one is too tight, I'll try another...

Or the old cheer:

Be Aggressive, be be aggressive (then you spell)
B-e-a-g-g-r-e-s-s-i-v-e agressive be be agressive. (Wooo!)

Changed to:

Prophylactic, pro pro phylactic
P-r-o-p-h-y-l-a-c-t-i-c phylactic, pro pro phylactic (Wooo!)

Urbane Guerrilla · 07-20-2010, 02:45 AM

[To the tune St. Thomas (Williams)]

I do not trust James Bond
I think he can un-der-stand
For ev'ry place he goes blows up
He is a dang'rous man.

I do not trust James Bond
And here's for the rea-son why
For ev'ry lady Ja-ames Bo-ond loves
Is sure-ly doomed to die.

My song must have its end
But in this world and be-yond
Of one thing I am absolutely sure
I do not trust James Bond!

coda: I do no-ot trust, I do no-ot trust, I do no-ot trust James Bond!

The wife came up with this one. Sometimes we collaborate; we really need to finalize all the verses of "The Great Loch Ness Monster" sometime before one or the other of us dies.

Gravdigr · 07-20-2010, 05:40 AM

Instead of "You might as well face it, you're addicted to love", we would sing "You might as well face it, what your dick did to love".

And to 'King of Pain' by The Police:

There's a little black spot on the bathroom floor,
Same ole spot that was there before.

And to the tune of 'If your happy and you know it clap your hands', the classic:

Got a skeeter on my peter, knock it off
Got a skeeter on my peter, knock it off
Got a dozen on my cousin, can'tcha hear the bastards buzzin'
Got a skeeter on my peter, knock it off

xoxoxoBruce · 07-20-2010, 08:21 AM

If I were the only girl in the world,
and you were the only boy.
You would have to pay and pay,
or you would have no joy.

squirell nutkin · 07-20-2010, 09:12 AM

My housemate used to sing this dylan song:

Whoooee ride me hard
tomorrow's the day
my bride's gonna cum
ooh ohh we're gonna fuck
down in the easy chair

etc.

Urbane Guerrilla · 07-27-2010, 12:06 PM

"Knock?" I never heard it any way but "whack."

squirell nutkin · 07-27-2010, 05:00 PM

Sailor's Hornpipe:

Tiddly winks, old bean
Have you ever seen a queen?
Have you ever seen a Salmon
up a dead sardine?

I've seen a tinker up a tailor
and a soldier up a sailor
But I've never seen a salmon
up a dead sardine

Urbane Guerrilla · 07-28-2010, 11:14 AM

Salmon won't fit in those little cans!

Shawnee123 · 07-28-2010, 11:26 AM

Summer's Eve
Makes me feel fine
Flowin' through the channels of my vagine

(did I just type that out loud?)

Urbane Guerrilla · 07-28-2010, 11:42 AM

And wasn't that Breeze, not Eve? Or am I just sticking in the artsy mud here?

07-18-2010, 04:02 PM	#1
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	I Write Lewd Parody Music in My Head ...and I'll bet you do, too. So, share it, already! It doesn't have to be a complete composition, but you should include enough lyrics to help us laugh out loud, and, of course, the song that you are using for the tune should be noted. Let me throw out the first example. Sing this to the tune of "Jesus Loves Me" : "Jesus loves me, more than you I'm a Christian, you're a Jew. Being Jewish breaks his heart You heathen bastard, worthless fart." I have more. You do too. __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

07-18-2010, 04:05 PM	#2
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	To the tune of "Strangers in the Night": "Strangers in my shorts, there uninvited, Strangers in my shorts, I fear I'm blighted"... Add your own. Fun for the whole family. Young children are particularly good at this. __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

07-18-2010, 08:57 PM	#3
squirell nutkin has a second hand user title Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: in a Nut House Posts: 2,017	Put your gland in the hand of the man that stilled the waters... __________________ And now I'm finished posting.

07-18-2010, 08:59 PM	#4
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	I didn't make this one up, but I do enjoy: Leprosy, bits keep dropping off of me I'm only half the man I used to be Since I contracted Leprosy (To Yesterday) __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

07-18-2010, 10:24 PM	#5
Cicero Looking forward to open mic night. Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: New Mexico Posts: 5,148	LOL! I agree. Sometimes I also write horrible limericks in my head too. It's all true. Sometimes I write entire songs that are not parodies either..like: "I Smell Like Gasoline" and Varieties of "Parking Lot Hooker" The lyrics and rhyming scheme change depending on my humour. __________________ Show me a sane man, and I will cure him for you.- Carl Jung

07-20-2010, 02:45 AM	#7
Urbane Guerrilla Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Southern California Posts: 6,674	[To the tune St. Thomas (Williams)] I do not trust James Bond I think he can un-der-stand For ev'ry place he goes blows up He is a dang'rous man. I do not trust James Bond And here's for the rea-son why For ev'ry lady Ja-ames Bo-ond loves Is sure-ly doomed to die. My song must have its end But in this world and be-yond Of one thing I am absolutely sure I do not trust James Bond! coda: I do no-ot trust, I do no-ot trust, I do no-ot trust James Bond! The wife came up with this one. Sometimes we collaborate; we really need to finalize all the verses of "The Great Loch Ness Monster" sometime before one or the other of us dies. __________________ Wanna stop school shootings? End Gun-Free Zones, of course.

07-20-2010, 05:40 AM	#8
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	Instead of "You might as well face it, you're addicted to love", we would sing "You might as well face it, what your dick did to love". And to 'King of Pain' by The Police: There's a little black spot on the bathroom floor, Same ole spot that was there before. And to the tune of 'If your happy and you know it clap your hands', the classic: Got a skeeter on my peter, knock it off Got a skeeter on my peter, knock it off Got a dozen on my cousin, can'tcha hear the bastards buzzin' Got a skeeter on my peter, knock it off __________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

07-20-2010, 08:21 AM	#9
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	If I were the only girl in the world, and you were the only boy. You would have to pay and pay, or you would have no joy. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

07-20-2010, 09:12 AM	#10
squirell nutkin has a second hand user title Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: in a Nut House Posts: 2,017	My housemate used to sing this dylan song: Whoooee ride me hard tomorrow's the day my bride's gonna cum ooh ohh we're gonna fuck down in the easy chair etc. __________________ And now I'm finished posting.

07-27-2010, 12:06 PM	#11
Urbane Guerrilla Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Southern California Posts: 6,674	"Knock?" I never heard it any way but "whack." __________________ Wanna stop school shootings? End Gun-Free Zones, of course.

07-27-2010, 05:00 PM	#12
squirell nutkin has a second hand user title Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: in a Nut House Posts: 2,017	Sailor's Hornpipe: Tiddly winks, old bean Have you ever seen a queen? Have you ever seen a Salmon up a dead sardine? I've seen a tinker up a tailor and a soldier up a sailor But I've never seen a salmon up a dead sardine __________________ And now I'm finished posting.

07-28-2010, 11:14 AM	#13
Urbane Guerrilla Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Southern California Posts: 6,674	Salmon won't fit in those little cans! __________________ Wanna stop school shootings? End Gun-Free Zones, of course.

07-28-2010, 11:26 AM	#14
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	Summer's Eve Makes me feel fine Flowin' through the channels of my vagine (did I just type that out loud?) __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

07-28-2010, 11:42 AM	#15
Urbane Guerrilla Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Southern California Posts: 6,674	And wasn't that Breeze, not Eve? Or am I just sticking in the artsy mud here? __________________ Wanna stop school shootings? End Gun-Free Zones, of course.

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