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Relationships People who need people; or, why can't we all just get along?

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Old 05-05-2011, 09:21 AM   #1216
monster
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ibram View Post
jealous. who's the lucky fellow?
don't tell us it was Penis Spam!1!!!11!?
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Old 05-05-2011, 09:39 AM   #1217
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Quote:
Originally Posted by limey View Post
There was a young lady called Fluck (did you know that Diana Dors real name was Diana Fluck?)
Who had the most terrible luck!
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Old 05-05-2011, 12:52 PM   #1218
Clodfobble
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Quote:
Originally Posted by morethanpretty
Sex...I just had some. Kinda, yeah....
MORT. The next words out of your keyboard are going to be that you didn't stop taking your birth control pills after all, right?
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Old 05-05-2011, 01:41 PM   #1219
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I am sure Mort just had sex with B.O.B.
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Old 05-05-2011, 05:11 PM   #1220
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I wonder what a child with BOB would look like?
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Old 05-05-2011, 05:21 PM   #1221
Gravdigr
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Ok time to finish this:

There was a young lady named Fluck
Who had the most terrible luck
She wanted to marry a horse
But she couldn't of course
So she married a fellow named Chuck
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Old 05-05-2011, 05:59 PM   #1222
morethanpretty
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Clodfobble View Post
MORT. The next words out of your keyboard are going to be that you didn't stop taking your birth control pills after all, right?
I did stop the pills, but I used another form of protection, aaand without getting too sickingly detailed....we did not finish the way that would have had the most risk of babies. (Although I realize pre-ejaculate can get you preggars too, but thats the reason for the protection.)
I'm still dating the boyfriend I was supposed to break up with...yeah I know. Its actually been kinda nice, not living with him, but still dating. We might work things out, and if not....well I'm determined to have some fun.
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Old 05-05-2011, 08:41 PM   #1223
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There was a young man from Nantucket
The rumours were greatly exaggerated.
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Old 05-05-2011, 09:38 PM   #1224
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Quote:
Originally Posted by morethanpretty View Post
....we did not finish the way that would have had the most risk of babies. ...
Ah, I see, this is the more refined way of saying you got bukkake'd.
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Old 05-05-2011, 09:53 PM   #1225
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If a stork brings babies what doesn't bring babies?
A swallow. (either African or European)
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Old 05-05-2011, 10:04 PM   #1226
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Big Sarge View Post
I wonder what a child with BOB would look like?
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Old 05-06-2011, 11:21 AM   #1227
DanaC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZenGum View Post
There was a young man from Nantucket
The rumours were greatly exaggerated.
*applause*
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Old 05-06-2011, 11:28 AM   #1228
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Quote:
Although I realize pre-ejaculate can get you preggars too
Interesting note of the day: although every sex education class, since the dawn of sex education classes, have told us over and over and over and over that pre-ejaculate can contain sperm and get you pregnant...

...it's pretty much safe as long as the pull-out is performed correctly.

(bonus for all: ask for it on your tits or face and he HAS to perform the pull-out correctly. on your belly and he may still be too late. good lord it really has come to this, but it's the truth.)
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Old 05-06-2011, 03:16 PM   #1229
footfootfoot
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Do not attempt this at home unless you are reasonably sure you want kids.
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...this reads like a cross between Cosmopolitan's 'ten ways to please your man' and a suicide note written by Nostradamus on a coke binge. - Flint
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Old 05-06-2011, 03:24 PM   #1230
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Quote:
Originally Posted by footfootfoot View Post
If a stork brings babies what doesn't bring babies?
A swallow. (either African or European)
Well, of course not.

How would he grip it?
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