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-   -   My Kid is a Damn Nutter (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=18924)

Clodfobble 04-22-2009 06:13 PM

I was just planning on publishing this thread in its entirety. Oh, did I forget to mention I was going to take everyone's content without consent?

Actually, I've been trying to find a time to get a good video of him, so you guys can really see what a completely different kid he is now.

monster 04-22-2009 07:17 PM

and the 8,065 is.....?

xoxoxoBruce 04-23-2009 01:50 AM

That's a reminder of a place long ago and far away.

Clodfobble 04-23-2009 10:02 AM

Yeah, it's on hold indefinitely. Maybe in another couple of years I'll have time to get back to it. :) I actually hope to have something new to put in my sig file soon. Waiting on Mr. Clod to take care of some stuff I'm not tech-savvy enough to handle on my own.

In other news, the National Autism Association knows their audience. When you join (I didn't, but my mother did,) you get a free gift: a copy of the Animusic DVD--you know, that CG music video compilation where the complex mechanical robots play synth music. Minifob watched the whole thing practically without blinking.

xoxoxoBruce 04-23-2009 10:31 AM

Those are great, I have them all. :D

Jill 04-26-2009 09:40 PM

Thought you might find this article interesting.

Clodfobble 04-27-2009 09:35 AM

There's a dedicated hippotherapy place here in Austin, I'm surprised they didn't mention it in the article.

Can I be a cynic for a minute? I'm sure the shamans were great and all, but I bet it also really helped that while in Mongolia he probably had to eat Mongolian food, i.e. no dairy or wheat.

dar512 04-27-2009 11:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble (Post 560715)
Can I be a cynic for a minute? I'm sure the shamans were great and all, but I bet it also really helped that while in Mongolia he probably had to eat Mongolian food, i.e. no dairy or wheat.

Didn't the Mongols invent yogurt? I suspect there's some dairy in Mongolia.

On the other hand, we live with a lot of manufactured chemicals in modern society. I bet there's a lot fewer in Mongolia.

xoxoxoBruce 04-27-2009 12:56 PM

Yak, reindeer, and goat would be vaguely dairy but I doubt the chemical composition would be the same.

jinx 04-27-2009 07:52 PM

My kids have never reacted to goat, sheep or buffalo dairy products - where as they get rashes, intestinal problems and/or bad attitudes from cow... although not nearly as bad now as when they were younger (40% tend to outgrow dairy sensitivities).

Also, but unrelated to food sensitivity, IGF-1 is identical in humans and cows. Google IGF-1 and cancer if you don't know what that means.

Clodfobble 04-29-2009 09:38 PM

So here's what I've been doing with my spare time recently: I started a GFCF cooking blog. Feedback eagerly welcomed.

xoxoxoBruce 04-30-2009 12:37 AM

Outstanding! Man, all that shit looks delicious, I'm giving those recipes to anyone I think might feed me. :D

Jill 04-30-2009 12:47 AM

Great site, Clodfobble! Feel free to post my kasha recipe from post #167 if you'd like. For the kids, reduce the proportions of onions and mushrooms by half and only add them to half the prepared kasha so the kids can have theirs plain. I really think you'll like it. Well, I hope you do, because then there'll be one more thing you can add to your "safe to eat" list!

glatt 04-30-2009 08:57 AM

Nice site! I would even eat some of that stuff.

kerosene 04-30-2009 10:28 AM

I suddenly have a craving for some brownies and frosting.

jinx 04-30-2009 10:33 AM

Just fyi - the original/vegan Earth Balance spread is gluten and dairy free, and tastes about a million times better than Fleishman's unsalted.

Clodfobble 04-30-2009 11:02 AM

Thanks jinx! I'll look for it at the store.

OnyxCougar 04-30-2009 12:06 PM

Not sure if you've heard this/tried this yet, but I found this today and thought of you:

Quote:

By Dr. Joseph Mercola

I have treated many children with autism and developmental delays over the past 10 years. Most have had excellent responses to the No-Grain Diet that I advocate for adults.

However, many treatment regimens for autism call for a gluten- and casein-free diet. Gluten is the major protein found in wheat and casein is the protein in milk.

Over the last six months I have come to realize that the major reason why autistic children need to avoid milk is because it is pasteurized. The pasteurization process turns casein into a very dangerous molecule that can further precipitate the brain injury. If the children are fed real raw milk this will not occur.

I have recently started recommending this to my autistic patients but have not received any feedback yet. However, I recently received an e-mail from two independent researchers and parents of autistic children who have been getting tremendous results with this approach.

The approach involves fermenting raw milk with kefir grains. If you are interested in fermenting the raw milk with kefir grains please read this comprehensive article.

The e-mail mentioned above follows:

"Dr. Mercola,

My colleague, Mary Helen, and myself have been feeding our children daily raw milk--either the raw cow's milk, or the raw goat's milk.

In addition to raw milk, we also have been fermenting the raw milk with kefir grains. The changes in our children are incredible!

However, we cannot spark any interest among other parents with autistic children, because they are deadly afraid of milk's theorized opioid effect.

In August 2002, we began to research opioids and their behavioral effects. It is almost a tragedy that this fallacious theory as the explanation for autism's symptoms had to be challenged by two mothers and not some research scientist. If autism wasn't such a serious problem, the opioid theory as provocateur of autism's symptoms is almost comical.

How parents of autistic children were ever sold on the idea that opioids caused those symptoms exposes the politics of research and the rejection of logic.

What should be embarrassing for medical scientists is that the one thing that probably can explain some of the behaviors seen in autism is hyperammonia, and in all the literature ever written on autism, there are only about three doctors who gave it the attention it deserved.

If you have never tried the real kefir grains, then you are in for a treat. Actually, the first time we tried them, we all experienced an elevated temperature and cleansing, presumably due to real detoxification. In any event, our families have greatly benefited from raw fermented milk products.

You will have to see for yourself. As mothers, we will always pursue optimal health and wellness for our families; but to also improve and possibly recover the cognitive functioning of our autistic children, that is our heart's desire.

The pasteurization of milk has damaged the gift of life and health. Even heating milk above 100 degrees to make yogurt causes protein cross-linking where amino acids become fused together. Poor lysine really goes through a beating!

You will never heat milk again after studying heat treatments, nor will you want pasteurized beer, pasteurized soy sauce, pasteurized fruit juices or pasteurized eggs.

The foundation for this paper is all on the 'autism-challenge;' a list that was created for autism research. It is where all this unfolded--one article at a time.

Sincerely,

Linda Carlton and Mary Helen Brauninger"

continues:

OnyxCougar 04-30-2009 12:08 PM

Part II:
Quote:


Over the last six months I have come to realize that the major reason why autistic children need to avoid milk is because it is pasteurized. The pasteurization process turns casein into a very dangerous molecule that can further precipitate the brain injury. If the children are fed real raw milk this will not occur.

I have recently started recommending this to my autistic patients but have not received any feedback yet. However, I recently received an e-mail from Linda Carlton and Mary Brauninger, both independent researchers and parents of autistic children, who have been getting tremendous results with this approach and have compiled a paper on the topic.

The approach involves fermenting raw milk with kefir grains. If you are interested in fermenting the raw milk with kefir grains please read this comprehensive article.

Their informative paper follows:

Heat-Killed Bacteria's Role in Inducing an Innate Immune Response and its Possible Link to Autism
By Linda Carlton and Mary Brauninger

Introduction

Autism, a childhood disorder whose behavioral symptoms usually manifest within the first few months of life, has been recently linked to environmental etiology. This paper presents the hypothesis that autism may be the result of a disease created by man due to the aberrant use of chemicals, drugs, vaccinations, environmental toxins and poor nutrition.

History and Today

The first known cases of autism seem to have appeared around the 1940s in America. There were several programs of change occurring during those years: the chlorination of water, the pasteurization of milk, and newly established immunizations to protect the health of the public, children and adults alike. (Marr and Malloy 1996)

All three of the above-mentioned programs were initiated for public safety in the control of bacterial and viral diseases. Thimerosal, found in many vaccines, is an organomercurial antiseptic that is anti-fungal and bacteriostatic for many nonsporulating bacteria and is used as a topical anti-infective or as a pharmaceutical preservative.

Other methods employed today to eliminate or control bacterial growth include low or high temperatures, chemicals, gases, microfiltration, bactofugation, sanitation and flavors. (Champagne et al 1994) Pasteurization is a process that stops fermentation in which the medium is brought to up to temperature levels sufficient enough to cease fermentation and kill bacteria. Vaccine programs also use this method of heat-killing bacteria and viruses to induce an immune response or tolerance to disease without infecting the subject.

It is commonly known that raw milk will sour, but pasteurized milk will putrefy. The idea that putrefaction of the stools causes disease (i.e. intestinal autointoxication) originated with physicians in ancient Egypt (Chen and Chen 1989). The toxic process, however, was reversed by the consumption of lactic acid-producing bacteria that changed the colonic microflora and prevented proteolysis (Chen and Chen 1989).

Autointoxication is an ancient theory based on the belief that intestinal waste products can poison the body and are a major contributor to many, if not all, diseases (Ernst 1997). By ancient tradition, lactic acid bacteria (LAB) are involved in the production of fermented foods. German scientists found that foods rich in LAB constitute one quarter of the German diet and are characterized by a safe history, certain beneficial health effects, and an extended shelf life when compared with raw materials (Hammes and Tichaczek 1994).

Microflora--'Early Life Studies'

In Finland, a double blind study revealed that when pregnant and lactating mothers and their babies were administered LAB, the immunoprotective potential of the mother's breast milk was increased (Rautava et al 2002). The study found
that the amount of anti-inflammatory transforming growth factor beta2 (TGF-beta2) in the milk of mothers receiving LAB as compared to mothers receiving a placebo was significantly higher (Rautava et al 2002). Rautava documented that breast-fed babies, unlike bottle-fed babies, have a microbic intestinal flora characterized by a marked predominance of bifidobacteria and LAB (Coppa 2002).

A breast-fed, full-term baby has a preferred intestinal microbiota in which bifidobacteria predominate over potentially harmful bacteria, whereas, in formula-fed babies, coliforms, enterococci, and bacteroides predominate (Dai and Walker 1999). It is unlikely, however, that a lower ability to ferment carbohydrates is a major cause of increased risk of diarrhea in formula-fed babies, but individual short chain fatty acid (SCFA) production may be important (Parrett and Edwards 1997).

In essence, the formula-fed baby develops a much different microflora than that of a healthy, full-term, breast-fed baby.

Autism & Ammonia--'Behavioral Symptoms'

In 1989 Drukker documented the first case of a patient with autistic-like symptoms found to also have abnormal blood ammonia. Drukker reported that the subject had symptoms of dementia, amnesia, and cognitive disorders and reportedly 'misdiagnosed' as autistic.

Later in 2002, Cohen found that by an approximate one-third reduction of GABA and ammonia levels for an autistic patient, there was noticeable improvement of verbal/language skills and a reduction of repetitious, ritualistic, self-stimulatory behavior (stimming).

LAB, lactitol, and lactulose have all been clinically shown to reduce blood ammonia (Loguercio et al 1987, Vince and Burridge 1980). Ammonia is produced by intestinal-bacteria (Vince and Burridge 1980). The largest amount of ammonia is generated by gram-negative anaerobes, clostridia, enterobacteria, and Bacillus spp (Vince and Burridge 1980).

Gram-positive non-sporing anaerobes, streptococci, and micrococci formed modest amounts of ammonia while lactobacilli and yeast formed very little ammonia; therefore ammonia may be predominantly formed from bacterial cells in the colon (Vince and Burridge 1980).

Gluten & Casein

Laboratory studies have provided evidence that casein, gliadins, and glutenins are hydrolyzed or degraded by fermentation with LAB, providing better digestibility and cereal tolerance. Dietary lipids influence the gastrointestinal microbiota and, specifically, the population of LAB (Bomba et al 2002).

The favorable protein utilization and body mass increment on fermented milk diets are attributed to a better digestibility of proteins in these products (Vass et al 1984, Chebbi et al 1977). A great deal may depend upon the dough acidification or quality of specific LAB species, live or heat-killed during processing, whether bleached or unbleached flour is used, pasteurized or raw milk in the processing of consumer goods.

Several autism studies have hypothesized that the behavioral symptoms in autism may occur due to opiate-like activity. Opiates are sleep-inducing drugs, and opioids are naturally occurring peptides with similar effects. An example would be that of warm milk, which induces sleep through a natural release of peptides into the system.

In autism, there are characteristic symptoms of sleeping disorders. In fact, a review of the literature on the behavioral effects of opioid-like peptides failed to include any of the common characteristic symptoms described in autism. Children with autism have been documented to have increased urinary peptides (Whiteley and Shattock in 2002). These peptides are broken down either by host bacteria or natural fermentation. These specific peptides were derived from dietary sources, in particular foods containing gluten and casein that are known to produce opiate-like affects (Whiteley and Shattock 2002).

Studies preformed on the effects of beta-casomorphin-7 indicate they activate a histamine release in vitro in the presence of copper (II) (Lodyga-Chruscinska et al 2000). Skin tests with opioid peptides naturally occurring in cow's milk (such as beta-casomorphin-7 and alpha-casein) showed wheal and flare reactions similar to histamine and codeine that were observed in all children (Kurek et al 1995, Kurek et al 1992).

Beta-casomorphin-7 and alpha-casein are noncytotoxic histamine releasers in humans (Kurek et al 1992, 1995). The bioactivities of peptides encrypted in major milk proteins are latent until released and activated by enzymatic proteolysis, e.g. during gastrointestinal digestion or food processing (Meisel H, Bockelmann
1999).

The proteolytic system of LAB can contribute to the liberation of bioactive peptides (Meisel H, Bockelmann 1999). LAB were shown to liberate oligopeptides from beta- and alpha-caseins that contain amino acid sequences present in casomorphins, casokinines, and immunopeptides (Meisel H, Bockelmann 1999). The further degradation of these peptides by endopeptidases and exopeptidases of LAB could lead to the liberation of bioactive peptides in fermented milk products (Meisel H, Bockelmann 1999).

Autism Microflora

According to recent laboratory findings by Finegold in 2002, some cases of late onset (regressive) autism may involve abnormal flora. The fecal flora of children with regressive autism showed much higher clostridial counts than that of control children, not unlike those studies done on breast-fed and infant formula-fed babies (Finegold et al 2002). Finegold found a total absence of non-sporulating bacteria in the autistic children; in effect, thimerosal, by definition, targets such strains.


continues:

OnyxCougar 04-30-2009 12:09 PM

part III:
Quote:

The more popular among diet choices recommended for autistic children is the casein-free and gluten-free diet. While an elimination diet may avoid the offending proteins, it also removes all dietary sources of LAB. Elimination diets (just as in infant formulas replacing mother's milk) have inherent gaps that create a need for supplementation of vitamins, minerals and amino acids; but it is also the absence of LAB that makes these diets problematic.

In 1983, Siegenthaler suggested that under certain conditions cultured milk, rather than fluid milk, can be used for infant formula and child nutrition as well as for school milk programs. Inappropriate handling of pasteurized milk is often responsible for a high bacterial count and organoleptic defects (Siegenthaler 1983).

The advantage of LAB fermented milk is the low pH created by the high lactic acid content that detrimentally affects food spoilage and pathogenic organisms in milk (Siegenthaler 1983) resulting in a longer shelf life of the fermented product at ambient temperatures (Siegenthaler 1983). Fermented milk products contain the enzyme lactase that facilitates digestion of residual lactose even after ingestion (Siegenthaler 1983).

Proinflammatory Cytokines

In 2001, Jyonouchi tested innate and adaptive immune responses in children with developmental regression and autism spectrum disorders. She found that children with autism produced higher levels of proinflammatory and counter-regulatory cytokines without stimuli than controls. Her results indicate excessive innate immune responses in a number of autistic children that may be most evident in TNF-alpha production. A fermented-milk, kefir, contains a substance that enhances IFN-beta secretion, the active substance that was identified to be sphingomyelin (Osada et al 1993-94).

The gastrointestinal system is continually subjected to foreign antigenic stimuli from food and microbes (Schley and Field 2002). Intestinal epithelial cells respond to lipopolysaccharides from gram-negative bacteria (Vidal et al 2002) and observations suggest that gram-positive organisms from lactic acid bacteria temper this reaction and prevent an exaggerated inflammatory response (Vidal et al 2002).
The reason why I quoted this big old long article instead of just the link is that you have to sign up for a bunch of spam to get to the article, and I wanted to spare ya'll that. :)

Source page here: http://articles.mercola.com/sites/ar...part-four.aspx

OnyxCougar 04-30-2009 12:16 PM

Quote:

Summary

Sixty-plus years have passed, and autism still remains a mystery.

Through the efforts made by modern technology to control bacteria and disease, the destruction of non-pathogenic bacteria has disabled our ability to battle disease.

The attempt to artificially replace mother's milk has created a flawed and harmful bacterial ecosystem in our offspring. Many rural societies provide a diet that contains sufficient quantities of non-pathogenic bacteria. Dietary proteins are broken down through a process of fermentation with non-pathogenic bacteria.

A feasible solution would be to ferment foods as has been practiced for many centuries rather than elimination of casein and gluten. Scientific studies have found that the use of antibiotics were futile in the attempt to control harmful fecal bacteria; however, non-pathogenic bacteria has been clinically shown to be effective in studies done on other diseases with far worse conditions.

Autism is a behavioral disorder defined by characteristic symptoms that we must compare with other diseases or conditions to lead us to a stronger association. Heat-killed bacteria induce an innate immune response; however, only live bacteria can repair mucosal barriers to temper immune responses.

Linda Carlton is an independent researcher and mother of an autistic son. Mary Brauninger is an independent researcher and mother of five. Two are autistic.
That's the end of the article.

Clodfobble 04-30-2009 01:05 PM

Thanks, OC, that had a lot of good information in it. I've read of many parents who have said that after an initial period of healing, their kids were able to tolerate goat's milk/yogurt/cheese, though I'm not sure if they were all referring to unpasteurized goat's milk or not. The Specific Carbohydrate Diet people (www.pecanbread.org) are big into making your own yogurt at home with a machine and a starter culture, so that's definitely got the good bacteria in it.

jinx 04-30-2009 01:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble (Post 561602)
Thanks jinx! I'll look for it at the store.

Np.. although the Smart Balance ("Light - now with flax oil" variety only - all others have whey) might be easier to find.

xoxoxoBruce 05-01-2009 11:30 AM

Check out today's turkey chili... nom nom nom. :yum:

Jill 05-01-2009 12:12 PM

That does, indeed, look really yummy! I may be hitting the grocery store on my way home today.

Jill 05-01-2009 02:59 PM

Researchers find first common autism gene
Quote:

Researchers have found the first common genetic link to autism and said on Tuesday it could potentially account for 15 percent of the disease's cases.

Three studies, two in the journal Nature and one in Molecular Psychiatry, suggest changes in brain connections could underlie some cases.

While the findings do not immediately offer hope for a treatment, they do help explain the underlying causes of the condition, which affects as many as one in 150 children, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

"These findings establish that genetic factors play a strong role in autism spectrum disorder," National Institutes of Health acting director Dr. Raynard Kington said in a statement.

"Detailed analysis of the genes and how they affect brain development is likely to yield better strategies for diagnosing and treating children with autism."

. . .

Clodfobble 05-01-2009 04:54 PM

We visited his PPCD classroom yesterday, which left me with mixed feelings. It was encouraging to see how well everything was run, and the total of three adults had what seemed to me to be a large number of kids completely under control. I was left feeling confident about putting him in their class next August. At the same time, it was awkward for me to see his classmates--mostly the discomfort of having to mentally group him in with kids who were obviously worse-off than he is, even though most of them clearly had other disabilities besides autism. But of the kids that I was guessing were autistic, some of them were more proficient at certain things than he is, so I can't claim he doesn't need to be there. (And yet, I still feel the need to remind myself that it's not a fair comparison because they are all older than he is, some by a full year or more, and they are all accustomed to the classroom routine already. It's hard to stop that "precious snowflake" mentality even in the face of direct evidence to the contrary... like my kid is totally going to be the best student in his remedial class, you know? :right:)

The other good news is there are 3 or 4 other kids in the class who are all on the GFCF diet, so I don't need to worry about explaining how to do it or why it's important for him; they know all about it. And here's another stupid little thing that made me happy: it was plain that 100% of these kids have issues getting their hair cut just like Minifob does. Every single one of them had either a "Hair By Mommy" cut, or the "Just Pin Him Down and Buzzcut It Every Ten Weeks" style. In all objectivity, Minifob had the best-looking hair of any kid in the class, hands-down. I've developed quite a talent, if I do say so myself.

I have to constantly remind myself to take the stress items in chronological order: 1.) getting the stepkids set up for summer vacation, 2.) Minifob's birthday, 3.) Family reunion wherein I am expected to host and plan most activities/food and at least two relatives will be staying at my house, 4.) actual occurrence of summer vacation with the stepkids, and only then 5.) Minifob's first day of (screaming at his abandonment in) school. Oh, and somewhere between steps 2 and 5 there will be a formal evaluation of Minifobette, and I will probably not be thrilled with the results. :yelsick:

monster 05-01-2009 10:11 PM

juat a reminder because I know you already know this, but it's easy to lose sight of......

Don't judge the learning environment solely by the other kids in it. the best learning (IMO) is non-competitive. it's about improving the skills of the individual. Individuals may have similar learning disabilities, but that doesn't mean they have the same learning abilities, and that's what really matters. Some kids with autism do pretty well in mainstream schools. Many don't. Some do great is specialized programs. Some don't.

xoxoxoBruce 05-01-2009 10:38 PM

More research with blue lasers.

xoxoxoBruce 05-03-2009 10:12 AM

OMG, this is unbelievable.
Quote:

They are neighbors Sarah Fisher, Danielle Harway and Kelly Plaster. All three filed court papers asking that Spencer, his sister Olivia, and mom and dad be restricted to their own home and driveway.
Quote:

The Trussells said there were no issues until Gary Trussell confronted another father on the cul de sac whose son was picking on Spencer.

It didn't go well.

Sarah Fisher reported the Trussells to Child Protective Services. She called Gary Trussell's employer, Continental Airlines, where he's a captain. She also made a call to 911, claiming he couldn't control his young children.

But the San Diego sheriff's deputy who responded declined to write a report. CPS dropped the case as unsubstantiated, and Continental Airlines stood by their longtime employee.

"I'm offended that someone would try to involve my employment, my profession in this matter," Gary Trussell said.

He has one firearm that's locked up. It was issued to him by the Department of Homeland Security for his job. He's a former lieutenant colonel in the Marines, who served his country for 25 years.
:mad2:

jinx 05-05-2009 12:51 PM

The spanish rice looks really good Clob. If your boy likes mexican so much, maybe he would like the nachos we make - although most people just think they're weird. Basically they're corn chips topped with refried beans (or canned pintos cooked in salsa until you can mush them a little) and cooked winter sqaush. I buy the frozen bricks of squash and cook them down in a little water or chix broth. If I'm not adding a bunch of other veggies (mushrooms, peppers, avocados etc) I put a litte sugar and cinnamon in the squash and then sprinkle more cinnamon over it before I pop in the broiler to crisp it all up.

Clodfobble 05-05-2009 03:49 PM

Thanks! Yeah, his one favorite meal that survived the shift is refried beans on corn tostadas. (He still calls them "beans and cheese" even though there hasn't been cheese on them for months.) I'll have to try the squash mixture--although I'll probably have to sell him on it as a "cheese dip" at first. :) I also read somewhere that one woman uses spaghetti squash (the kind that you tear out of the shell with a fork and it separates into these little strands like spaghetti) as the "cheese" on her kid's pizza. Another said she used grated polenta.

Clodfobble 05-05-2009 07:11 PM

Recently I've had to take some serious steps back to evaluate myself in all this. Since January I've lost 15 pounds, a combination of stress and not having the energy to find stuff to feed myself on this stupid diet. It's at the point where Mr. Clod has officially stated that I could stand to gain some weight back. I have also undone thousands of dollars of childhood orthodontic work, as my nighttime teeth-grinding has finally resulted in my jaw slipping back to wherever it was before they did that whole metal contraption in my mouth that repositioned it--so now my jaw clicks again, whenever I move it around. And a couple of weeks ago, I had a severe dizzy spell that lasted over two hours and finally resulted in my calling the paramedics because I was by myself with the kids and was really sure I was going to pass out. The paramedics couldn't find anything wrong, and their continued questioning about something that might have caused a "panic attack" well and truly pissed me off, because that particular week happened to be the freaking pinnacle of Minifob's entire existence, the best days he'd ever had. It wasn't a fucking panic attack, I was dizzy. When Mr. Clod got there, he insisted on taking me to the hospital to have basic tests run, because he personally was convinced it was a nutritional deficiency, but everything checked out okay.

But then I started thinking about it... you know how when you're working really hard on a project, you go and go and go and when you finally get a vacation, you suddenly get sick as a dog? I think that's kind of what happened, because that week really had been so good, everything was coming together and I had just begun feeling genuinely optimistic that he might have a full recovery within another year or two. But obviously there's a lot of work to do yet, and the paramedic episode forced me to recognize that I can't sustain this level of stress for that long.

So I've been working really hard on getting things off my plate, identifying which things I can safely refuse to even look at. We need to replace one of our cars in the very near future, and I have completely abdicated that task. Mr. Clod knows our budget, and he'll show me the final car before he signs, but I'm not allowing myself to spend even one minute on used car searching. And I told him to tell his mother that I simply will not discuss the question of Minifob going to stay with her in the summer of 2010 until my calendar actually says it is 2010. I'm still looking for other things to get rid of, but right now it looks like the best I can do is thwart anything new coming my way.

Beestie 05-05-2009 07:25 PM

There's a reason they tell parents to put on the oxygen mask first.

I think what happens is that during periods of high stress, your body goes into overdrive to keep you going and neglects some of its own basic ongoing needs - sort of like [/Star Trek] diverting power from life-support to power the shields [/Trek]. When the stress is relieved, your body then goes back to normal but normal is now compromised and the piper must be paid.

I think cutting back and remembering who the captain is is a good start.

You are doing a good job and are wise to do periodic checks to make sure all the goals are in the right order and receiving the proper allocation of resources.

monster 05-05-2009 09:12 PM

Oh, Clodfobble, do not wobble
when you're busy, and get dizzy
some chocolate you must gobble

Don't neglect your awesome self
don't waste away, or turn all gray
Minifob needs you in decent health

That's probab;y the worst pseudo poem I ever written. It's quality is not a reflection of yours. perhaps your awesomeness is so powerful it sucks awesome from poetry written about you?

dr monster agrees with beestie that you are doing the right thing, and prescribes chocolate (eaten in secret) and much silliness in public. trust me on this.

Beestie 05-05-2009 09:47 PM

I may just have to up and send some prescription-strength Beestie Balls to House of Clod to aid in the replenishment of parental strength.

They're chocolate-covered, you know. And they have just enough elixir to get the job done.

Pie 05-05-2009 10:12 PM

I really feel for you, Clod.

After my father's transplant and death last June, I similarly reached a stage where I . could . not . cope . with . one . more . thing.
Unfortunately, that 'one more thing' was my mother's own anger and depression. It's taken months for me to get back to a frame of mind where I can .swallow. my own bitterness and anger and try to help her.

Burnout is a terrible thing. You are a wise woman to recognize it for what it is, and to get help.

xoxoxoBruce 05-06-2009 01:15 AM

Clod, you have done, and are doing, a fantastic job. The problem is you're too smart. You know there is more information out there, there will always be more information out there, but you'll never be able to assimilate it all, so don't make yourself crazy/sick trying.

Deep down you know you're winning, you've got a handle on it now. So let the whole family get used to the routine... and then you can progress at a saner pace for a bit.

Maybe it's our fault too. We love you and want to give you all the support and encouragement need, but don't let us push you into thinking you can fly, OK?


No reason you can't sneak a Hershey bar when they ain't looking. ;)

Clodfobble 05-06-2009 09:42 AM

Ah, see, but actually, milk chocolate has milk in it, and I'm still staying GFCF myself until I can wean Minifobette because it has noticeable effects on her. I take your point, though. Rice Divine makes a dairy-free ice cream with dark chocolate and coffee beans. :)

LabRat 05-06-2009 11:39 AM

Hopefully some of your family and friends that you mentioned pointing this thread out to will be able to give you a helping hand as needed. ::cough:: ;) You are definitely doing the right thing (as usual :D) focusing on what can be put off. One of the most important things the Fobblets need is a healthy mom, so t's OK to let things slide occasionally. You aren't being a 'bad' mom/wife/friend/family member. By taking care of yourself, you are taking care of all of them.

My heart goes out to you, but really I wish there was something more tangable I could do for you.

monster 05-06-2009 08:23 PM

you need a massage. a professional one,including facial. Mother's day is coming up. just sayin'

Clodfobble 05-07-2009 03:19 PM

I am totally pumped about today.

First off, Minifob woke up with a dry diaper, which he's never done before, so potty-training might not be as far out in our distant future as I had thought. Then, we went to our first outing with a local playgroup I joined. His therapist agreed that it was really time to start pushing him on the socialization with kids his age, now that he can be taken to new places pretty reliably (as long as they're kid-safe places to begin with, and not china shops. :)) He did an awesome job--didn't outright acknowledge any of the other kids, but played happily alongside them with only the barest of sharing issues, and left peaceably when it was time to go. And I got along great with the mothers I got a chance to talk to--one woman did seem a little freaked when I told her Minifob was autistic, like maybe it was contagious, but the rest of them were open and interested. And one of them... well, her boy is only 17 months, but I'm telling you now, he's autistic. I didn't say anything specific to her about it, but I can tell she already suspects something anyway. She was very interested in my conversation with another mother about what Minifob was like when he was younger (i.e., not displaying any of the "classic" symptoms they tell you to look for on the PSAs, but all the weird things he did do,) and what we were doing to treat him now. Not that I would wish this on anyone else, but it's nice to feel like you might be able to help out someone in the same boat.

And now, the little dude is taking a nap. Joy! I already rescheduled his therapy appointment next week so that we can make it to another playdate near us.

Queen of the Ryche 05-07-2009 03:38 PM

Wow Clod. That is so awesome. It must feel absolutely amazing to get out and do "normal" things with him. And like you said - the possibility of helping others through your experience - bet you didn't go there with that in mind! Next time he takes a nap, I'll send juju your way that it will coincide with Fobette, so you can take one too =)

DanaC 05-07-2009 03:57 PM

Sounds like a fun day was had by all Clod. *smiles* Like Queeny says, must be nice to do the normal stuff :P When a little'un has an illness/condition/special needs, it can take over a little, especially when the diagnosis is pretty fresh. Can be hard work not letting that become their 'identity', especially around other people. You sound like you're handling it so brilliantly though. Kid'll do great with parents like you.

LabRat 05-07-2009 04:03 PM

That.

Rocks.

In too many ways to count. Congratulations on how far you've all come.

Clodfobble 05-07-2009 04:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Queen of the Ryche
Next time he takes a nap, I'll send juju your way that it will coincide with Fobette, so you can take one too =)

Oh they always coincide, by design. It's just that Minifobette actually sleeps, while Minifob usually just does calisthenics in his crib until I come and set him free again. I used to give him reprieve after about an hour and a half, but now I make him stay in until Minifobette wakes up, no matter how long that is. Otherwise he'll just wake her up, and that's no fun for anyone.

limey 05-09-2009 12:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble (Post 561965)
....
I have to constantly remind myself to take the stress items in chronological order: 1.) getting the stepkids set up for summer vacation, 2.) Minifob's birthday, 3.) Family reunion wherein I am expected to host and plan most activities/food and at least two relatives will be staying at my house, 4.) actual occurrence of summer vacation with the stepkids, and only then 5.) Minifob's first day of (screaming at his abandonment in) school. Oh, and somewhere between steps 2 and 5 there will be a formal evaluation of Minifobette, and I will probably not be thrilled with the results. :yelsick:

I watch this thread in awe as you deal with all this stuff so magnificently, Clod! I have nothing much to add not being a parent'n'all but you DO have to believe that looking after yourself is a major and integral part of looking after everyone else. So I'd humbly suggest offloading some/all of the family reunion duties listed above. Just this once?

ETA: I love LOVE the way you're writing the recipes! You rock!

Clodfobble 05-09-2009 03:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by limey
So I'd humbly suggest offloading some/all of the family reunion duties listed above. Just this once?

Yabbut, in all honesty, how? I have to do the cooking because none of the other relatives have any concept of cooking GFCF (most of them don't even know my kid's autistic yet.) Once I plan a menu and buy the ingredients, they can help me make it, sure, but the planning is the hard part. I'm working on offloading the activities section of things, but that has hazards: my cousin coming from North Carolina keeps talking about how many great outdoors things there are to do around here. Which is true--in the Spring. He has apparently been away for long enough to completely forget what 100 degree weather feels like.

xoxoxoBruce 05-10-2009 03:17 AM

Talk's cheap, the weather will slow the cousin down for ya. :haha:

limey 05-10-2009 05:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble (Post 564164)
Yabbut, in all honesty, how? I have to do the cooking because none of the other relatives have any concept of cooking GFCF (most of them don't even know my kid's autistic yet.) Once I plan a menu and buy the ingredients, they can help me make it, sure, but the planning is the hard part. I'm working on offloading the activities section of things, but that has hazards: my cousin coming from North Carolina keeps talking about how many great outdoors things there are to do around here. Which is true--in the Spring. He has apparently been away for long enough to completely forget what 100 degree weather feels like.

Well done on offloading the activities - once you've delegated leave it to them (that's the most difficult thing about delegating!).
Can you politely ask the two relatives who're expecting to stay with you that they make arrangements to stay somewhere else?
I dunno, but I think that's what I'd try to do.
Good luck anyway.

Clodfobble 05-10-2009 09:04 AM

They're staying here because they're both dead broke right now (through no fault of their own, they're generally upstanding contributing members of society)--another relative bought their plane tickets too. If they didn't sleep at my house, they couldn't come at all.

limey 05-10-2009 09:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble (Post 564408)
They're staying here because they're both dead broke right now (through no fault of their own, they're generally upstanding contributing members of society)--another relative bought their plane tickets too. If they didn't sleep at my house, they couldn't come at all.

I thought that might be the case ... All I can do is send you supportive vibes ...

Clodfobble 05-17-2009 05:38 PM

Tiki reminded me (not her intention with that thread, I'm sure :lol:) that I finally got an updated video on Minifob's progress. Behold!


xoxoxoBruce 05-17-2009 06:09 PM

What a difference from this. Yay you. :notworthy

You know, when they're grown and don't call often enough, you'll have a ton of ammo for the guilt trip you lay on them. :haha:

jinx 05-17-2009 07:36 PM

Amazing. :thumbsup:

And they're both adorable.

kerosene 05-17-2009 09:56 PM

Wow! Most excellent. By the way, I am keeping up with your blog. I can't wait to try the sweet wine fish. :thumb:

A slightly off topic question: Do you notice a difference, physiologically, or mentally for yourself being on this diet?

Clodfobble 05-17-2009 10:42 PM

In myself, no. I have lost weight, as I've mentioned, but part of that is also because I am frustrated trying to find things to eat for lunch if I don't have leftovers from the night before, so half the time I end up just not eating. On the other hand, they say the older you are the longer it takes to clear your system--other people's anecdotes seem to indicate I'd need to be on it for a full six months before I saw any possible effects.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jinx
And they're both adorable.

Thanks! I'm pretty fond of 'em myself.

Griff 05-18-2009 05:14 AM

Your kids are too cute! Well done Mom.

Clodfobble 05-18-2009 07:33 AM

Did you notice how Minifobette seemed to try to "smile" when I said I was going to take a picture? These are the tiny socializaton cues I am desperately clinging to these days for her. It took her a long time to really fight off her measles shot, but she's finally back to normal poop now for several days in a row, so I'm letting myself be hopeful (not to mention looking forward to weaning her.) She's still borderline, socially, but in the last week or so she's really stepped up the progress again.

Queen of the Ryche 05-18-2009 12:40 PM

Wow Clod. Made me cry. Absolutely amazing. (You, and the progress.) Congrats. Keep up the great work!


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