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Clodfobble 05-29-2020 03:11 PM

Bummer. I can't quite tell if you're feeling any antagonism toward the adult kids, but I wouldn't. They're grieving in their own way, and haven't had enough life experience to realize the neighbors might have cared about him, too.

monster 05-29-2020 03:24 PM


Originally Posted by Clodfobble (Post 1053308)
Bummer. I can't quite tell if you're feeling any antagonism toward the adult kids, but I wouldn't. They're grieving in their own way, and haven't had enough life experience to realize the neighbors might have cared about him, too.

Oh no, I'm glad they're relaxing after such a stressful time. Sorry, I was meaning to reassure the world (and myself) I guess :)

monster 05-29-2020 03:25 PM

The other neighbor asked me to go over with her to pass on condolences, so we just did that

monster 05-29-2020 03:27 PM

....and it was a bit odd to imagine our texts flying over them as we talked about them/their dad

Griff 05-29-2020 05:04 PM

So much weird right now. Hoping for a more sensible 2021.

DanaC 05-29-2020 05:40 PM

That's so sad Monster.

DanaC 05-29-2020 05:44 PM

My next door but one neighbour died a couple of weeks ago. I didnt know him that well, but I liked him - he was part of our little community.
Only 10 people allowed at the funeral, but they brought the the funeral cortege down the lane and we all walked behind keeping 2m apart until we got to the end of the lane. They stopped the cortege and had a moment of silent reflection, then off they went.

Strange - dignified but really odd.

BigV 05-29-2020 08:08 PM


And sad.

DanaC 06-01-2020 06:24 PM

Carrot's brother, Merlot is very sick. He and their rescue dog Biscuit are currently in a boarding kennel in Hanoi and have been since back end of February when the two Js came back to the UK for a 3 week trip which turned into a lockdown stranding them here for the last 2.5 months (they we due to fly back I think 18th March )

The kennels have been great and kept them updated with videos and pics - it's a nice place with nice staff. But they found out last week (i think) that Merlot was showing signs of either an abscess or a tumour behind his right eye. That has now been confirmed through blood works as almost certainly a tumour (they can't confirm with MRI as there are no scanning facilities at any of the vets in Vietnam).

They've been sharing between their vet in Hanoi and their vet in the UK and it isn't looking good.

When Jude told me about it a few nights ago, his biggest fear was that Merlot would die before they could get over there and he'd never know where they went and that would just about break Jude. And then if that happened, Biscuit would have lost his whole pack, again - he is already a rescue dog who'd been abandoned before they adopted him.

The one bright piece of news is that I found out today Jude managed to get a flight organised for this weekend - failing the world turning on its head again he should be over there by Sunday.

I really hope Merlot hangs in there. I hate the thought of him not having his people with him. And I really hate the thought of what that would do to Jude. Don't get me wrong it would beak Janet's heart too - but Jude's surprisingly fragile at times. I worry the degree to which that would floor him. He's only really started to get his head back together after his sister died probably the last 12 months and even then it's up and down. He went into a pretty deep depression when she died, about 4 years ago - pretty sure thats what triggered the whole career change and move to Vietnam.

Anyhow - that got a bit rambley. I just needed to get that off my chest before bed.

I am really glad they got his flight sorted out. It's shit that Janet cant go back with him yet (different kind of visa) but at least they will have one of them there with Merlot and Biscuit.

Gravdigr 06-01-2020 07:25 PM

That's gotta be tough.

Griff 06-02-2020 06:16 AM

Our dogs get in deep. :(

Griff 06-02-2020 06:18 AM

Binghamton had one of the nicest special needs playgrounds in the state. Assholes burned it down over the weekend.

BigV 06-02-2020 10:58 AM


Originally Posted by Griff (Post 1053446)
Binghamton had one of the nicest special needs playgrounds in the state. Assholes burned it down over the weekend.

I doubt the arsonists were protesting the death of George Floyd.

Griff 06-02-2020 02:19 PM

Clearly true.

DanaC 06-13-2020 06:18 AM

Update (s) on Merlot.

So ,,, Jude managed to get a flight - armed with his negative Covid-19 test certificate and expert visa, he left Yorkshire, got on a plane ... and in the intervening period between buying tickets and getting on the plane, Vietnam had changed their entry requirements: for people whose flights left before the complete ban on foreign nationals came into force they would be allowed in only with a signed letter from immigration - the complete ban went into force the day after Jude had to give up on his attempt. He got as far as Seoul where he was supposed to get a connecting flight to Hanoi and that's when he found out. Had to turn right back around - couldn't even do an overnight stay in Seoul because he'd have had to go into quarantine and been stuck there 2 weeks,

He got back to the UK on the Sunday evening - and had to grab a few hours sleep and then get up and start his online teaching at 1am (his students are of course on Vietnamese time)

Earliest they may possibly be able to get to Vietnam is 1st July

Merlot is failing fast. They had hoped to get him to Thailand for surgery and chemo to try and buy him time but the borders closed and not opening for at least another week to 10 days.

Their VN vet was trying CBD oil as there has been some indication that this may help shrink tumors - however, yesterday he wouldn't eat at all and they have him on a drip - if he doesn't rally by morning, the two Js think they will have to ask for him to be put to sleep.

I am heartbroken for them - and a little for me too.

I remember after Jude had been in this job for about a year, and janet had decided to go and live over there, Judah was saying he would be coming back for visits and bringing Merlot - I said then I worried Carrot and Merlot would never see each other again. I said it half jokingly when we got the boys together for a visit ahead of them leaving - but I also kind of meant it. I just figured if they end up staying there for 5-6 years, that would take the dogs to 12 or 13, and the practicalities of taking dogs on such long flights would probably make bringing him with on a UK trip not happen.

I didn't have anything quite so fast in my head. Poor Merlot. He's such a happy little soul. The idea of him suffering breaks my heard. And the idea of him not being with his own people makes it so much worse - even though I know that Merlot isn't lay there wondering where they are. He's bonded with the kennel staff after such a long time - and he has his adopted brother Biscuit with him.

I know people are going through worse shit as a result of this virus - denied the last moments with dying family members, separated from young children, stuck in random hotels on the other side of the world ... but this still feels so sad and unfair. They came over for 3 weeks, got stuck for 3 months and then it turned out those were Merlot's last 3 months. It feels a bit like they were robbed of those last few months with him.

Anyhow - enough of such sadness. I am going to go walk Carrot in the rain.

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