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-   -   What's making you happy today? (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=14055)

Sundae 06-26-2013 12:07 PM

We ordered pizza last night.
Dads is in hospital for at least the next four days; probably more as he didn't start his steroid drip until this morning.
Mum left with him at 09.00 and didn't get home until 19.10. Delays, delays, delays, then having to repeat all the information given to the GP, and the last consultant, and the one before that, and the results of the last ECT and...... you get my drift.

So she came home fuming and said, "SOD IT!"
We're not "allowed" to order in pizza when Dad is here.
Because it's cheaper from Tesco.
But it's so much nicer delivered!

Given my recent wait-a-thons in hospital, I think Mum was really pleased to have me to come home to and moan to. Quite justified moaning.
And I know she was pleased to tuck into pizza with me.

So we had a lovely night, eating too much; I had a can of beer - just one - Mum had wine which she left in the fridge and I did not touch. And we watched the silly things we both bond over and really laughed.

When we get on, we get on well. And I know we both went to bed relaxed and un-fraught. I'll bet Mum woke in the night and worried. She called him first thing after all. But I'm doing what I can.

I've organised our first Tesco (supermarket) online delivery for tomorrow - woohoo!
First-timer discount wipes out the delivery charge and still makes it cheaper than shopping yourself and getting a taxi home. And although I've hauled around bulky items for years, I'm trying to show Mum & Dad an easier way.

Given that Dads is going to have to seriously take things easy when he gets back, I think it's a worthwhile experiment. Will wait and see how many substitutions there are...

Anyway, Mum & I are going to have Chinese tomorrow, Friday or Saturday night. Depends how she feels. It's a surprise :neutral:
Tesco Chinese. But that's the least I can do. And she does like the old Tesco Chinese.

Apart from that I'm doing the things she usually does even before I wake up, or I have to make appointments to do: washing, ironing, hoovering, dusting etc.
Trying to be a good girl. It's times like this I realise how much she loves him, despite how angry she gets. Which by association means she loves me too.

Clodfobble 06-26-2013 12:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sundae
I had a can of beer - just one - Mum had wine which she left in the fridge and I did not touch.

Sundae, you know I love you, but--dammit, woman. I am pretty angry at your mother for enabling you. If you were my daughter, I wouldn't have alcohol in the house, even if it meant I didn't get wine with my occasional pizza. I know you fight your own struggle daily, and you're doing the best you can, but our families are supposed to be safety nets, not tripwires.

chrisinhouston 06-28-2013 09:08 AM

I feel pretty good as I was able to help my step son and his wife by painting the interior of their old home on the west side of Houston as they hope to rent it out next month. It is a 3 bedroom, about 2000 sq ft and I boutht10 gallons of paint and so far have used about 7 to 8 and am only left with some touch up. I painted it the same color throughout which made the going easier but it has a fair amount of wear and tear what with 5 kids living there. Need to do some trim work on the door and window frames.

They and the kids are on a summer road trip to the east coast to visit family for 2 weeks, it was a good time to paint while they were gone and it took me 4 days although I typically only painted between 9am and 3pm to avoid heavy cross town traffic.

Not that I would want to do it for a living but I wonder what a professional painter would have charged?

footfootfoot 06-28-2013 01:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble (Post 868826)
...but our families are supposed to be safety nets, not tripwires.

Yeah, I guess The Gruppenführer (soon to be ex mrs. foot) didn't get that memo. (and her TPS reports need work too.)

BigV 06-28-2013 05:58 PM

Scored tickets to see Macklemore!

They sold out in fifteen minutes.

ZenGum 06-28-2013 06:35 PM

Um, Sundae ... what Clod said. Double. :grouphug:

BigV 06-28-2013 06:47 PM

I thought about making such a comment as Clodfobble and ZenGum made. I feel that way, sure.

But.

Having more first hand experience in my family than I wish I did, I know that it's a losing battle to try to manage the alcoholism of another. The whole fucking deal is one giant slippery slope. "How much compensation is too much or not enough?" etc etc. No matter what amount of work from totally de-alcoholizing my house to buying a pitcher of beer for a shared meal will make fuck-all of a difference should the alcoholic choose to drink.

Sure, there's supportive behavior. There's unsupportive behavior. But the choice to drink or not is at all times in the hands of the individual.

In my opinion, Sundae, you should not drink alcohol. I base my opinion on what you told me about the serious negative effects it has on your health. That's my piece.

Now, if we were having dinner together and you asked me to forgo having a beer with our pizza, I would consider it, and probably grant your request. I might even ask you directly, "do you mind if I have a beer with dinner?". I have done that in the past in similar situations. But I don't want to be implicitly responsible for the your actions.

Sundae 06-29-2013 06:31 AM

Oh gosh, I feel a bit sick now.
I don't know whether I'm ashamed for me, or embarrassed for my Mum or just generally guilty.

Sorry.

ZenGum 06-29-2013 08:04 AM

:grouphug: please take care of yourself.

footfootfoot 06-30-2013 10:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sundae (Post 869028)
Oh gosh, I feel a bit sick now.
I don't know whether I'm ashamed for me, or embarrassed for my Mum or just generally guilty.

Sorry.

You don't owe anyone an apology.

monster 06-30-2013 10:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble (Post 868826)
Sundae, you know I love you, but--dammit, woman. I am pretty angry at your mother for enabling you. If you were my daughter, I wouldn't have alcohol in the house, even if it meant I didn't get wine with my occasional pizza. I know you fight your own struggle daily, and you're doing the best you can, but our families are supposed to be safety nets, not tripwires.

Sundae is an adult. She is not her parents' responsibility forever. Hopefully she will outlive them. What then?

WTG on keeping the beer to one and not drinking the wine, S.

Sundae 07-01-2013 04:47 AM

Thank you.

We're having my birthday lunch in Wetherspoons today. Maybe a poor choice on Mum's part, but it is the cheapest place to eat in town where you can be sure of the quality.

I've told her I will not have a drink. And I won't.
Like you say, I'm going to have to face these choices all my life.

I have a sneaky suspicion we're going to be using the gift card I got Dad for Father's Day. Bless him, he's not had a chance to use it yet!

Big Sarge 07-08-2013 05:33 AM

I received pics & videos of my youngest daughters. I posted them in my summer vacation thread

xoxoxoBruce 07-08-2013 08:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chocolatl (Post 868678)
Both of them are still single and, from a woman's perspective, understandably so.

:lol2:

Quote:

Originally Posted by glatt (Post 868766)
Anyway, I'm really happy. Happier than I should be. I mean, our fucking AC is broken. But Joe is on the job!

It's an electro-mechanical device. You know it can be fixed, it's just how long and how much. But having someone fixing it that you trust, is better than the cool side of the pillow. :thumb2:

morethanpretty 07-11-2013 12:13 PM

Yesterday Della had a great time playing with a friend's dogs. I've finally found someone to have regular play dates with!

To top it off I've been dating a super sweet guy for a bit and I just made him my boyfriend officially.

All of my docs and family members are amazed at how well I'm doing!


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