Husband!

No! Bad Jim! Bad Jim.

I guess Griff has earned his dad card.

Song To Be Sung by the Father of Infant Female Children
by Ogden Nash

My heart leaps up when I behold
A rainbow in the sky;
Contrariwise, my blood runs cold
When little boys go by.
For little boys as little boys,
No special hate I carry,
But now and then they grow to men,
And when they do, they marry.
No matter how they tarry,
Eventually they marry.
And, swine among the pearls,
They marry little girls.

Oh, somewhere, somewhere, an infant plays,
With parents who feed and clothe him.
Their lips are sticky with pride and praise,
But I have begun to loathe him.
Yes, I loathe with loathing shameless
This child who to me is nameless.
This bachelor child in his carriage
Gives never a thought to marriage,
But a person can hardly say knife
Before he will hunt him a wife.

I never see an infant (male),
A-sleeping in the sun,
Without I turn a trifle pale
And think is he the one?
Oh, first he'll want to crop his curls,
And then he'll want a pony,
And then he'll think of pretty girls,
And holy matrimony.
A cat without a mouse
Is he without a spouse.

Oh, somewhere he bubbles bubbles of milk,
And quietly sucks his thumbs.
His cheeks are roses painted on silk,
And his teeth are tucked in his gums.
But alas the teeth will begin to grow,
And the bubbles will cease to bubble;
Given a score of years or so,
The roses will turn to stubble.
He'll sell a bond, or he'll write a book,
And his eyes will get that acquisitive look,
And raging and ravenous for the kill,
He'll boldly ask for the hand of Jill.
This infant whose middle
Is diapered still
Will want to marry My daughter Jill.

Oh sweet be his slumber and moist his middle!
My dreams, I fear, are infanticiddle.
A fig for embryo Lohengrins!
I'll open all his safety pins,
I'll pepper his powder, and salt his bottle,
And give him readings from Aristotle.
Sand for his spinach I'll gladly bring,
And Tabasco sauce for his teething ring.
Then perhaps he'll struggle through fire and water
To marry somebody else's daughter.

:lol:

That poem made my whole day.

It's clementine season! Time to eat my own weight in tiny, seedless, sweet, and oh-so-easy-to-peel citrus!

I'm with you on that! :thumb: :)
Clementines are teh yummm.

My new hat arrived.
I likey.

It was very cheap. And suggested for people on chemo. So I have it ready for the day when my current hairloss becomes public knowledge. I'm probably not losing all that much tbh - but while I'm a redhead it's really noticeable in the shower! Great menstrual-looking clots of it! But yes, it is a symptom of liver damage. Sigh. As are my spider veins, which means my famous cleavage is now under wraps.

Still - happy thoughts, happy thoughts.
At this early stage a full recovery is possible.

And I like my new hat.

Funny thing was, when it arrived it was from Yusra Hijabs, which wasn't mentioned on the eBay blurb. It comes from Syria. Does that make me a Muslim now? Them and their sneaky agendas. Is that why I craved kebab last night?

Liver Damage? How did I miss that?

What happened?

Foot I sent that pome to my younger brother, father of 3 daughters...oldest 12, youngest 7. He'll love it. :)

Nash was just brilliant.

I had an elderly Japanese friend who owned a cat named Clementine. She pronounced it Kurementine however. After a while my curiosity about why she would name her cat something she couldn't pronounce overcame me. Figuring out a semi tactful way of finding the answer I asked her how she came to name the cat Clementine.

"That was her name when I got her."

OK, then.

Now I always call the fruits, Kurementines.

Kurementines, clementines ... by whatever name, they are teh yummm. :yum:

I love Nash. How do you come to be such a poetry polymath?

Oh, my darling.

Taj used to be Maggie. At the time, Maggie was the bitter old bitch I supervised at my job then. She was awwwwwwwwfullllllllllll. I had to change kitty's name to Taj Ma Hall (she had a reddish dot in the middle of her cute little calico head.) ;)

Drinking is what happened. I know at the time I admitted to it on the Cellar I was still in a grrrrr with you. I was in a grrrrr with other people I formerly treasured because some Cellar issues came to a head at a time when I really could not deal with them, and I never bothered to explain why I was vulnerable.

No blame now. But I still have health fallout to deal with. And isn't self-imposed fallout the shittiest?

There's more recently, but I can't in all conscience put it in this thread.
And am too scared to admit to put it in words anywhere else yet.

SO.

Diz was Dizney when I adopted him.
I'm not shy in saying I am pretty much anti-Disney.
The sanitisation of stories, the homophobia, the ban on beards...
He became Diz very quickly.

what the fuck did you just say there????????? between the ha-ha's and happiness and all lads together- WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?????????????????


SEE? Now I'm mad. I knew about the liver thing-a bit about it- but what NOW? Pm me or something you wench or I'll twist your ear off!!!

WHAAA? Bin all out in public and you got a PM and everything.
You know I trouble gurrrrrrl.

Yah okay.
Pictures may be in order.

The hairloss isn't like chemo hairloss. Just a thinning.
The nasty red spots are noticeable though. They've been coming on for a while though. Hence no real photos of me apart from face. And no fun bruising pics now I know it's exacerbated by the liver problems. Stops being quite so amusing. Ditto bleeding, esp from the lips and nose.

Other symptoms - while I'm on a roll, bloodshot eyes even after good sober sleep, itching, loss of appetite, loose bowels and blah, blah blah. Choc sez I should start a thread about my health. I guess it would keep it off the general board. And then in many years time you can download the posts as warning to your kinder about the dangers of drinking.

This is not meant to sound cross.
If I am cross it's only with myself, knowing about all this and STILL not making all the right decisions, although I am making some of them.

borrowing this > what the fuck did you just say there????????? :eek:

Dear Sundae I hope your body heals good as new with a cherry on top!!

My credit score is much much higher than I thought it would be. Woot.

Carrot went for hydro today, and for the first time theynput the underwater treadmill onto the 'uphill' setting. Quite a low gradient, but a challenge when coupled with walking against the water.

He did 17 minutes! Took him about 6 minutes to find his stride, he was swinging wild and veering to the side, or wobbling about as his feet placed at odd angles. Thought for first couple of minutes that he may only be able to do 12 minutes, but once he found his stride he seemed comfortable with the pace.

He wobbled about something shocking afterwards though. You could see his little legs had gone to jelly. No pain, no gain babydog, feel the burn, etc etc.

So now he's uber relaxed having burned off a bucketful of high-octane puppy energy.

Also, this morning I let him off his lead for some runabout play with a couple of local dogs. Oh he loved it so. They're both dogs that play nice and no risk of them trying to rubgy tackle him or anything.

This was a rambly way of introing what's making me feel happy: I'm feeling really quite optimistic about Carrot's prospects. After nearly two months of hydro and exercises he wasn't building the muscle he needs to build and I was feeling despondent. Since I had him neutered (I should really have posted about that....God I felt a traitor) his appetite has stabilised and he isn't refusing his meals. So he has started to fill out and the muscles are visibly forming around his hind quarters.

He is using those muscles more in his day to day movements too. Not just in the exercises that push him to use them. I can see his legs bending properly now for some of his walk. Though he returns to his swinging shuffle when tired.
Since he's been cut these quirks of movement are so much clearer to see. A shaggy beardie coat smooths it all out to observers.

So yeah. I think he's going to be ok. Of course I now have to persuade the insurance people that the limit of 12 sessions of 'complementary therapy' should be extended, but we'll leave that for another time ;P

I'm glad to hear Carrot is doing so well, Dana! What a great update! I think neutering really helps domesticated animals. Seriously - when I was breeding Siamese and Balinese cats, hormones just made those guys so miserable. And they had so many more health problems that miraculously cleared up the moment they were spayed/neutered. Maybe it's being consumed by hormones while expected to live like a non-hormonal being (as a pet), or maybe wild animals are also miserable and unhealthy with their hormones. It's counter-intuitive but it doesn't surprise me that Carrot has improved after cutting. So don't feel bad. Glad he's improving and going to get all the right muscles working. Keep posting photos, he's too adorable to stay unadmired by his Cellar family!

I'm feeling ridiculously, unaccountably happy this evening. Wrote an exam and spanked it (with either the Expert or the Sweet Spot, I can't remember), and came home to my little place with my furniture and my food in the fridge, and ... being on my own and making it is making me very happy. I don't need much. And contrary to previous threats and advice, it seems I can survive.

So I'm silly with happiness, getting ready to polish off one more assignment in this week of exams and papers and bleh, sipping a nice cab and admiring the flowers on my table, and ... hoping I'll run across some humor and poetry and general wit here tonight that's beyond me, but which I can appreciate. :)

Cheers!

Your post makes me feel happy.

Y'know, it's funny, but even after all these years i still sometimes get a kick out of living alone. Making a meal for myself to my tastes, on my budget, according to my decisions.

And my ex wasn't even a bastard. Though he sometimes did a very good impression of one. He's still my best friend. And he's chilled a lot over the years. His current partner has a much nicer and happier him :p But he was emotionally abusive without really realising it and is a bit of a control freak particularly when something is troubling him.

I can relate, I've been living alone for 20 years, but during the last year I've been visiting a friend for a week, every month or so. I enjoy it but it feels great to retreat to my cave. :guinea:

My cave ... that's it. Is there such a thing as a woman-cave? If not, I'm stealing the concept.

Of course there is, anyone can haz one. ;)

I love my wife and kids dearly, but it's really awesome on the rare occasions when I get the house to myself.

I'm pleased to hear youre so happy tonight ortho.

Just waiting for the fireworks to start? I'd better get my assignment done before the MDMA kicks in, then ... give a woman her own cave and you never know what might happen ;)

Here's something to make Sundae happy.

Attachment 42002

It fits now. :)

Oh how darling!

She looks so surprised! What a cutie. How old is she, Ali?

She's 10 weeks old now choco. Getting bigger by the second. ;) You know what that's about huh? :)

The Merry Recluse!

Oh Ali it really did!
Going to print off a copy for Mum.

You wouldn't want me to cuddle her right now, because I am dying of bad cold/ throat infection - which has stopped me seeing the twins this weekend - booooo. I'd give her a squeeze if I could though. I'm not into babies per se, but those of friends and family are very loveable, because they can leave ;)

Do you realise you have the same amount of children - and same genders - as the Beckhams? There, next time you bump into her you know you have something in common.

Thanks also for your post re liver damage.
It's very good to know someone else who has been through it and come out of the other side. The Doctors did stress the regenerative properties of the liver, but the symptoms have really crash landed on me (especially my skin) so it has felt like walking around on bail.

'bail' as in you're out of jail or is there some substance called 'bail' that I don't know about but imagine as like sharp rocks on barefeet.

Sorry, out on bail, not something new and exciting.

I think there are probably enough street drugs out there that make you feel like you're on bail - paranoid and walking on a shifty surface. Shit, even wearing a new pair of shoes makes me feel like The Little Mermaid. The original one I mean, not the peculiar undersea hoarder, Ariel.

but Ariel did hoard some good stuff.

She had a Georges de la Tour down there ya know. A Mary Magdelene one.

Had to Wiki.
All I could think of was Frances de la Tour.
Really laughing now. It's making me cough. Stoppit.

Just as well I'm half a world away then if you're sick. ;)

Didn't know that about the beckhams. lol Don't care too much either, although chances of running into them are apparently more likely since apparently Davo is considering coming over here to play soccer.

Your liver will be fine. Just be good to it and all will be well mate. give it lots of lovely healthy whole foods and water. Get yourself some liver tonic or supplements if you can and think positive. :) You're going to be fine. xxx

Investigate this for yourself, Sundae, but milk thistle (sold anywhere, really) is supposed to be good for your liver.


Ask your local hippie shop personnel.

Phew.

Went for a walk at lunchtime today and decided to go all the way over to check out the National Christmas Tree behind the White House. I knew I would be cutting it a bit close, because I had to be back to my building for a short presentation I had to give to new hires about our department. Well, as soon as I stepped through the open gate into the area behind the White House, the cop standing there closed it behind me. They were locking down that area so a motorcade or something could go through! Normally, I'd stick around to see who it would be, but by closing that gate, I couldn't go back the way I came and instead had to walk about 5 additional blocks around the perimeter of the far side of the White House to get back to my office. Grr.

So I took a quick shot of the Christmas tree and started hustling the long way back. Had to take my jacket off, because I was eventually breaking a sweat. Checking my watch the whole time. I had 15 minutes to go about 12 blocks. I really needed 20 minutes.

But I got back to my building and straight into the conference room just 30 seconds before the department before me finished their bit. Phew.

I know you were on the edge of your seat. But you can relax now. It all worked out.

Here's the tree.
Attachment 42046

Well, with all that pagan symbolism, it assures me the Obama isn't a Muslim. :D

The small trees look underdressed.

The icing arrived, so I can do my Christmas cake today! Yay!!!

and here it is so far
 

ooo yummy

Love that Michelle Shocked song. Loved that whole album.

Got two Cellar Christmas cards AND some goodies.

I spent the day watching my oldest son get sworn in/called to the Bar at the Maryland Courts of Appeal. He's persevered and overcome so many challenges ... my heart was so full, watching him take the oath, it almost hurt. Later we wandered around Annapolis, which I've never seen, and browsed a great spice shop - they had the most amazing spice blends, and all sorts of salt - Cyprus flake, black lava salt, big blocks of pink Himalayan, chardonnay smoked salt, salt with lavender and cardamom, and black truffle salt. And we found an Irish store with real Christmas crackers!! (I can never find them in PA.) And Christmas pudding with brandy butter! And real mincemeat! And Christmas cake!!

(In my family, it isn't Christmas without Christmas crackers. All the years I did the Ukrainian twelve-dish dinner, I still had Christmas crackers. You have to wear the little paper hats (for at least one photo) and take turns reading the jokes on the slips of paper while the turkey gets cold, or it just isn't Christmas. :p:)

It was a great day, a once in a lifetime sort of day.

:applause:

:congrats:

Hell, I've never even heard of most of those salts. :mg:
Congrats on the boy passing the bar.

It takes a special kind of salt to make a man pass a bar.

Fantastic, Ortho! What a great day, what great memories to have! And you're right about the crackers! Mr Limey and I have crackers with our Christmas dinner even though there's just the two of us!

Sent by thought transference.

Congrats!

Sunshine today AND tomorrow!

Sounds like a wonderful and happy day, Ortho. Congrats to both of you.

Congrats on your son you must be so proud! :) Always have the crackers with their bad jokes and fun prizes.

Congrats to your son, ortho! You sound so proud. :)

Oh God !!! Another Shark in the water !!!
JK Ortho , congrats to your son !!!

Whats makeing ME Happy you ask ??

Free lunch at a Plant I was checking scales at !!!
I was just getting finished checking scale and the Quality Lady asked
" Are you going to have lunch with us today ??"
" Ughh Whats for lunch ?? "
"Pork ( I start knodding my head ) Steaks ( I Knodd faster )"

They had Grand paw behind the plant with his smoker fixing pork steaks , and Grand maw had fixed Beans and slaw and MANY baked goods !!!
No I dont know who's grand parents they were , i just know they seemed Pleased when I complimented they on the food !
It was KILLLLLLER , oh and Grannys Brownies were OUT STANDING !!!!!