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Old 04-25-2009, 02:14 PM   #1
lumberjim
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Stupidity at Work

I should be able to make daily contributions to this thread.

today....

salesman: Uh.....we're going to have to re-do all that paperwork....I uh..just realized that the car we did is a stick shift.

F&I guy: You sonofabitch.

Don't they fucking drive the car they're buying anymore? Isn't that kind of like car sales 101 stuff? Isn't this the biggest Nissan dealer in the area? Don't we know what the hell we're doing?
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Old 04-25-2009, 02:43 PM   #2
The Teapot
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Newb "What was the sermon on the mount?"

Me (bullshitting)"Its when jesus gave a speech from horseback"

Person "Don't be silly they hadn't invented horses back then"

I'm told said person has a degree.
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Old 04-25-2009, 03:27 PM   #3
xoxoxoBruce
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I'd say that confirms it.
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Old 04-25-2009, 05:31 PM   #4
Urbane Guerrilla
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Person should have added, "...They were only up to unridden young donkeys by then!" and delivered a broad -- ba dump bump.
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Old 04-26-2009, 10:05 PM   #5
morethanpretty
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Supporting a store today and I shutdown one of their office computers to have them fix something minor. Took over an hour to get them to find the right computer to power back on. Why? Because they wouldn't listen to me, instead of finding the tower, like I explained to them repeatedly, all they were doing was switching the view on their KVM switch. I finally got frustrated enough that I had another technician talk to them.
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Old 04-26-2009, 10:09 PM   #6
richlevy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Teapot View Post
Newb "What was the sermon on the mount?"

Me (bullshitting)"Its when jesus gave a speech from horseback"

Person "Don't be silly they hadn't invented horses back then"

I'm told said person has a degree.
So you finally met Ann Coulter.
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Old 04-26-2009, 10:10 PM   #7
lumberjim
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did you try repeating yourself in louder and louder increments?
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Old 04-27-2009, 12:26 AM   #8
Aliantha
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lumberjim View Post
I should be able to make daily contributions to this thread.

No doubt.
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Old 04-27-2009, 01:51 AM   #9
Bullitt
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The award for dumbest coworker goes to a guy I worked with last summer in Wyoming. His first achievement was the near severing of his right middle finger. He was bored working at the wood pellet mill while waiting for the hopper to top off so we could continue filling bags (we could bag faster than the mill could produce pellets, so there was lag time every now and then). In his boredom, he looked at a bucket elevator and thought to himself "gee, I wonder how many pellets is in each of these buckets?" Here is a bucket elevator very similar to the one in the mill:


The buckets are metal and move at a quick rate bringing material up to the top and dumping it out. He proceeds to stick his hand into the bottom hole of the elevator (see the lower green arrow in the picture, right in there) and tries to quickly grab a handful of pellets out of a bucket. Being the ex-meth addict that he is, his reflexes and general hand-eye coordination are not top notch. He doesn't time it right and isn't at all fast enough, and so his finger gets caught between a bucket and the top of that little opening. The elevator has an auto-stop function if something impedes it, and so it stopped right away. But not after the blunt metal edge of the bucket had gouged into his finger to the bone, fracturing it in the process as well. Luckily, he kept his finger and walked away with some stitches and his finger still usable too.

The second thing he did which merits this award was getting himself lost in the mountain wilderness with no map, compass, food, or any kind of survival gear. This was later on in the summer after the finger incident. He and I and three other guys were up in the Big Horn mountain range taking down a couple miles of old barbed-wire fence. Was a multi-day project that was about an hour drive from Sheridan, so we were camping up there in tents overnight. This guy decided to head into town one night after we got back to camp from working to go to the store. Said he would meet us back in camp in the morning for work the next day. Well he doesn't show up at the agreed upon time, so we wait for about an hour and finally decide to head off without him. He shows up after we leave and since he has no idea where we were (we were starting on a new section of fence that day), he decides to just take off walking trying to find us. Gets himself turned around and lost in an unfamiliar area, and has no clue where he is or where to go. Finds a fence he thinks is the right one (it wasn't) and starts tearing part of it down. Finally decides to try and head back to camp since it was getting dark and is still lost. Meanwhile, the rest of us have gotten back after tearing down the correct fence, and see his vehicle at camp but he is nowhere around. We wait until it is near dark and decide we have to go looking for this guy, he's obviously off on his own. As soon as we leave camp in our trucks, he shows up walking down the road and explains what happened. Needless to say, the boss refused to pay him for the day's work because a.) he showed up late and didn't actually do anything, and b.) tore down someone's fence (he doesn't know exactly where since he was lost) so now that guy's valuable horses or cows are liable to get loose one day.
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Old 04-27-2009, 09:08 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by richlevy View Post
So you finally met Ann Coulter.
Richlevy is helpless before the Right, avoids the Light, and so on, preferring to act like a juvenile. All that, just to stay left of center.
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Old 04-27-2009, 11:22 PM   #11
ZenGum
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Marking tests in applied logic (see the Mildly Irritating thread).

Seriously, kid, the question asked you to read and analyse a bunch of bad arguments relating to UFOs and alien abductions. You might point out the argument from absent evidence, the appeal to ignorance, the ad hominem, the anecdotal evidence, the generalisation based on a small and biased sample. Why the #%&$ did you spend the whole section writing about dinosaurs???
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Old 04-27-2009, 11:43 PM   #12
Aliantha
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Surely you can see the logical connection between dinosours and UFO's???!
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Old 04-28-2009, 07:23 AM   #13
binky
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Quote:
Originally Posted by richlevy View Post
So you finally met Ann Coulter.


Yes I'm another leftie. It's a shame that "right" is synonomous with "correct"
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Old 04-28-2009, 08:29 AM   #14
Shawnee123
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Please please please guard yourself against Corporal Tunnel Syndrome.
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Old 04-28-2009, 09:39 AM   #15
Pie
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One cable. Two projects.

One of them is not getting done on time.
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per·son \ˈpər-sən\ (noun) - an ephemeral collection of small, irrational decisions
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