The absolutely illuminating Undertoad thread

dar512 · 11-20-2006, 09:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Undertoad

Not only do I read every post, but I read it one minute after it's written. I may take a minute or two and reply at that time.

Also, I am awake and connected 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Bound to be a bit geeky, but absolutely illuminating and guaranteed to be true.

I'll start off.

Undertoad codes by typing native binary into cat or copy (he's platform agnostic).

There is no database behind the Cellar. Undertoad just remembers everything you've ever written and types the pages on the fly when accessed.

Spexxvet · 11-20-2006, 09:14 AM

UT has sixteen keyboard spread out in front of him, and types on them simultaneously. Sometimes he grows extra hands and fingers, which retract when he no longer needs them. He predicts posts, and has responses already saved on his mental hard drive, so he can just copy and paste them.

Sundae · 11-20-2006, 09:18 AM

When he's had a heavy meal sometimes a little acidic bile rises and this surfaces in the Cellar as trolls. He will tolerate it to a point - being manly, but after a while he cancels it out with a Banned antacid.

Elspode · 11-20-2006, 09:18 AM

The Cellar is not physically connected to the Internet. Undertoad telepaths its contents in real time to each individual user's computer screen, including each character, as you type it. He does this while playing World of Warcraft, listening to three CDs simultaneously, playing with his dog and flirting with Jacquelita.

Spexxvet · 11-20-2006, 09:20 AM

Buddug was UT's poop.

lumberjim · 11-20-2006, 10:00 AM

Mr Shepps is too humble to allow this type of thing. you should all expect to be banned in a moment.

Flint · 11-20-2006, 10:04 AM

UT authored the entire Chuck Norris phenomenon, using anecdotes from his own life, in order to make fools of those who might try to expose his omnipotence.

SteveDallas · 11-20-2006, 10:11 AM

The human being some of us have met at GTGs, etc. is a hireling of UT whom he sends out so that we won't discover The Truth as explained in posts above.

11-20-2006, 10:14 AM

UT invented the Internet when he was but a lad of 12. He invented binary code at the age of 4.

Spexxvet · 11-20-2006, 10:16 AM

The universe that we percieve is merely a bass solo, played by UT.

Flint · 11-20-2006, 10:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spexxvet

Sometimes he grows extra hands and fingers, which retract when he no longer needs them.

Flint · 11-20-2006, 11:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spexxvet

The universe that we percieve is merely a bass solo, played by UT.

wolf · 11-20-2006, 01:17 PM

Undertoad causes all sorts of amazing things to occur in the universe and sends people out to take pictures of them to assure a well-stocked IOTD queue.

barefoot serpent · 11-20-2006, 01:43 PM

An IT job was posted at one of the premiere science institutes. Undertoad's left little finger was over-qualified for the job.

Trilby · 11-20-2006, 02:33 PM

UT and The Beast had a show-down.

Later that same day, UT had a big plate of Roast Beast for supper.

11-20-2006, 09:14 AM	#2
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	UT has sixteen keyboard spread out in front of him, and types on them simultaneously. Sometimes he grows extra hands and fingers, which retract when he no longer needs them. He predicts posts, and has responses already saved on his mental hard drive, so he can just copy and paste them. __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

11-20-2006, 09:18 AM	#3
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	When he's had a heavy meal sometimes a little acidic bile rises and this surfaces in the Cellar as trolls. He will tolerate it to a point - being manly, but after a while he cancels it out with a Banned antacid. __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

11-20-2006, 09:18 AM	#4
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	The Cellar is not physically connected to the Internet. Undertoad telepaths its contents in real time to each individual user's computer screen, including each character, as you type it. He does this while playing World of Warcraft, listening to three CDs simultaneously, playing with his dog and flirting with Jacquelita. __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

11-20-2006, 09:20 AM	#5
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	Buddug was UT's poop. __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

11-20-2006, 10:00 AM	#6
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	Mr Shepps is too humble to allow this type of thing. you should all expect to be banned in a moment. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

11-20-2006, 10:04 AM	#7
Flint Snowflake Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Dystopia Posts: 13,136	UT authored the entire Chuck Norris phenomenon, using anecdotes from his own life, in order to make fools of those who might try to expose his omnipotence. __________________ **************** There's a level of facility that everyone needs to accomplish, and from there it's a matter of deciding for yourself how important ultra-facility is to your expression. ... I found, like Joseph Campbell said, if you just follow whatever gives you a little joy or excitement or awe, then you're on the right track. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Terry Bozzio**

11-20-2006, 10:11 AM	#8
SteveDallas Your Bartender Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Philly Burbs, PA Posts: 7,651	The human being some of us have met at GTGs, etc. is a hireling of UT whom he sends out so that we won't discover The Truth as explained in posts above.

11-20-2006, 10:14 AM	#9
marichiko Guest Posts: n/a	UT invented the Internet when he was but a lad of 12. He invented binary code at the age of 4.

11-20-2006, 10:16 AM	#10
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	The universe that we percieve is merely a bass solo, played by UT. __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

11-20-2006, 01:17 PM	#13
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Undertoad causes all sorts of amazing things to occur in the universe and sends people out to take pictures of them to assure a well-stocked IOTD queue. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

11-20-2006, 01:43 PM	#14
barefoot serpent go ahead, abbrev. it Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Lawrence, KS Posts: 2,623	An IT job was posted at one of the premiere science institutes. Undertoad's left little finger was over-qualified for the job. __________________ Chooses rowing vs. wading

11-20-2006, 02:33 PM	#15
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	UT and The Beast had a show-down. Later that same day, UT had a big plate of Roast Beast for supper. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

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