| marichiko |
06-08-2004 04:59 PM |
Quote:
Originally posted by lumberjim
hmmm. well, first off, i don't think doctors get to award anything, do they? second, you act as if you'd be proud to be on perm disbility. like it is your goal. tsk tsk tsk. what happened to rehabilitating yourself through writing therapy or whatever so that you could start taking care of yourself agian? thirdly, by saying that you were a blithering idiot too, i was trying to take the wind out of your sails before you let them fill up.
It's a little tired by now, that's all. the whole martyr thing you two do. it must make you nuts that he put you on his list. it's fairly obvious that it does. don't you think that when radar is logged in under "spivey" that he sees it and laughs heartily to himself? is that what you want? no, i don't think so. so, my ADVICE. ( not a rule, bruce) is to ignore him too. not with the ignore feature, but with your buddhism. radar is but a wave breaking against your consciousness unless you let him in.
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No, they don't LJ. And that was a joke about using Radar's own venom for the sake of a cause he despises, O.K.? So, no I don't want to be on SSDI for life. And I don't understand your third point????
I know I have a tendency to do the "martyr thing." I apologize for this, and I've apologized before, and I'll probably have to apologize again at some point. One symptom of my neurological difficulty is that my temper has become paper thin. I used to be the most easy going person in the world, and now look at me cross-eyed and I turn into a bitch, I admit it. I don't like bringing this point up because to me it feels like a cop out ("oh I'm a sick person, I can't help myself" whine, whine, whine. I actually DO try to avoid doing such things). If you want to read just a little of my story it's here: http://www.csindy.com/csindy/2003-12-18/cover.html
But its not required reading by any means.
I didn't know Radar had a "nome de guerre." Doesn't it say somewhere on this board that you can't do that? So that's news to me. How do I explain my situation without coming off as whining? That's a serious question, and I'd love a serious reply. Should I make no mention of it when someone does me an incredible kindness? Should I avoid expressing my frustration when I make some REALLY stupid mistake because of my memory? Should I never mention the fact that I'm terrified much of the time because I don't know what's going to happen to me? Maybe bringing those things up is "playing the martyr", but those things are just basic facts of my life.
So how do I get a "nome de guerre"? I was just thinking how I'd love to impersonate the person I once was and create a cyber character for myself where the past 7 or 8 years of my life never happened. I don't like being critisized any more than anyone else does. I'm tired of always feeling like I need to defend myself. Tell me how to pull off the name change and you got it. |
