My thoughts are with Dazza and his family, Ali.

You too, but as you said, not too emotional for you :)

So sorry Ali, horrible to have to watch your guy go through something so painful. *hugs*

What's upsetting me is that my friend L, was taken into hospital last night. I just found out. She has severe rheumatoid arthritis and about 12 years ago had a really bad attack that almost totally immobilised her. They used an experimental treatment which worked and got her mobile again. Law of diminishing returns on the drug though. She was at a funtion last night and it was in a cold village hall. She felt ill and went home and by time she got into her house she was in a very bad way.

I just hope they find something that works again.

Sorry to hear bout that D.
All the best.

Sorry also to post the most selfish of selfish posts following it.

Mid-afternoon HM said he was cooking a roast this evening if I was interested.
I hemmed and hawwed and realised the size of the roasts in the freezer he must already have started defrosting and there would be a right waste if I said no now, and also he probably felt he was treating me.

Well I had already decided to restrict my diet today after having loaded nachos last night. Was going to have smoked salmon offcuts (+cheap) with cracked wheat and raw veg. And tomorrow!

Anyway, I said yes and feigned enthusiam. But it's about four hours since. He hasn't asked how much I want re potatoes or any roast veg. I've already said in conversation I like my lamb pink. I said I'd have a small roast but no indication he hasn't already started the veg (I hope so, he knows I eat before 19.00 preferably).

I'm sorry - I come across as the bitch queen from hell, but I like to know what's coming. I'll be very grateful to his face - and indeed I am - I'd just have preferred some consultation.

Sorry again for venting - I kow I am lucky.

Sorry about your friend Dana. How's she holding up now?

Update on grandmother: They turned the ventilator off on sunday and she started shallow breathing, but she still hasn't woken up (remains in a coma). I'll be calling the hospital shortly for an update.

Aw Ali I missed your post
Any distress to a family member is distress to you

Are you taking the boys?
From what I remember she is not their Grandmother by blood - may be a difficult decision

Good luck and kind thoughts on your way x

No we wont take the kids. I have to sort something out there in the next few days. You're right, she's no relation to them. In fact, they've never even met her. She lives in another city and even Daryl doesn't see her too much.

Very sorry to hear that. I have had a few friends have to make some tough, but correct, decisions to withdraw life support on family members. It is one of the toughest things a person has to do. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

I tore my Medial Meniscus in my right knee a week ago yesterday Refing a rugby match. I put off going to the ortho surgeon for about three days until I could not take the pain any more. Finally I went and sure enough just as I guessed. Oblique tear of the posterior horn. Hopefully it is not a bucket handle tear. I will have to have surgery a week from this Tuesday. I hate taking pain meds so I am sticking to the NSAID's for now. I had the same injury about 5 years ago so I knew what happened as soon as I felt it. My last injury was three days on crutches and I was running after about 2 weeks. Such is life...

Sux Merc.

I dumped a full beer into my laptop last night. Upsetting - but I'm pleased that the only effect so far is sticky keys.

knee pain is the worst from what I've heard. I hope it all goes smoothly for you Merc.

CRUD!

Ali: If you need someone to keep an eye on the boys, methinks you have a neighbour who owes you favours of this kind!

Merc: It's a rough game, when even the ref does his knee.
"... put off going to the ortho surgeon for about three days until I could not take the pain any more..." :rolls eyes:

yea, and I am a health care provider.:cool:

Zen...I've been thinking that, except I don't really think she's that stable to be honest. I think she needs to get her shit together.

I'll work something out though. Don't worry about that. :)

You're over-analyzing and internalizing too much.

1) go look in the kitchen to see what's going on
2) ask him where he's up to -it's not rude. You could even ask if you can help.
3) what waste? roast meat makes great sandwiches and these days there's a marvelous invention for leftovers call the microwave...
4) You want him to ask you how much you will eat? I'd consider that rude, if he is cooking for you as his guest. ..... just an extra tuppenceworth there.
5) I would not expect my guest to dictate meal times, meat rareness or portion control. Why do you expect to?

You don't seem yourself tonight. SG, are you OK?

hope it all went well.

Nah, I've been really really low these last few days. Unable to sleep, finding basic tasks difficult, hating myself - so I was probably projecting some of that on him.

In my defence, I always ask a guest before a roast how many potatoes they want (and add two over), whether they want parsnips, roast onions. I ate to serve up a huge pile of food and have someone pick off one slice of meat and two carrots.

The time issue is simply that - I eat early, he eats late. Originally it was going to be 18.30. We ate at 19.45. Not a problem really, but as a twitchily punctual person I got jumpy.

It all worked out fine of course - the meat wasn't rare but it was very tender and the gravy covered the fact the veg were lukewarm. I'm sure he ate what I didn't afterwards.

I'm going to the doctors on an unrelated issue today, I'll tell him about my downswing. I'm sure it's all part & parcel though. Got a new gym class today (Reebok Deck?!) that might time me out enough to stop whining.

grandmother died this afternoon. We're going to Sydney tomorrow morning.

Sorry for Dazza's loss
Hope it goes as well as it can

Is reebok deck like a step class, SG?

Hormones getting you down maybe?

I would expect HM to ask you are vegies and portion...especially since he knows you are dieting.

I love RPM or Spin classes and *Stomp*....cross between Step and Pump (weights)

Thanks SG. You're a doll.

My grandpa fell and broke 6 ribs.

For the last few years he's been going downhill pretty steadily. . .And I'm not going to be able to see him for at least 13 months. That's optimistic, too.

Yes Ducks, it was a very low grade step class - cardio to start as the warm up, then step, then resistance using bands. I found it very hard, especially the step and there were two exercises I couldn't do in resistance. So I'm going next week. Went to the gym as well - have my re-assessment tomorrow. HM says I wouldn't have been able to complete today's class 6 weeks ago. I just see what I can't do as usual. It's a long road.

Perry sorry to hear about your Granfather - 6 ribs is pretty spectacular. When my Grandad started to fall it sudenly became a common occurrence BUT it lead to him being diagnosed with Parkinson's and having his home fitted out for extra safety and balance. His falls got far less frequent.

All I can say is I know it's scary when your older relatives give you an inkling they won't be around forever - just stay in touch any way you can so you have nothing to regret just in case. I'm sure you'll be back to see him soon enough.

Ali , sorry to hear of ya'll loss , I KNOW its a relief though ( for it to be over that is )

SG , let him cook what he wants ,
you eat what you want , ( if he whines you can tell him you are trying to diet )
smack your lips and tell him him GOOD it was ,
Then offer him a low cal desert

Total bummer, sorry for your loss.. could have been a blessing.

Sorry to hear about Dazza's gran, Ali. Best wishes to him and his family.

Sorry to hear about Dazza's loss, Ali. Also sorry to hear bout your Grandpa, Perry. Must feel worse being so far away. *hugs*

I have a good news update on my friend. She was discharged from hospital this afternoon and is now ensconced in her armchair at home. I'm just on my way down to see her now, actually. Glad she wasn't in longer, it's exactly the kind of thing that her political enemies would make a meal out of.....with sugared tones of concern obviously.
Still....she's out, she sounds a damn sight brighter than i was expecting her to and hopefully the new tranch of drugs will halt the worst symptoms again. *smiles*

Holy Shit...Sorry Ali....that sucks.

My sympathy to you and your family, Ali.

thanks again everyone. We're off to the airport soon. Just killing time waiting for the cab.

sorry about your Pop Perry. How come it's so long till you can see him?

don't know, but I'm crying and thinking of suicide. Not imminently, just . . . what would happen if I got disabled and was unable to work. My savings would last me about 2 years, and then, pffft! Better to end it than be a burden to my family.

But I think just thinking about is -- a Bad Sign.

But not necessarily a chronic sign. Is this something that normally makes you worry? Is there anything particularly stressful going on right now? When I'm feeling bad, I'm able to easily work myself up to crying just thinking about what would happen to my family if I died, or what I would do if my husband or kids died... What I'm saying is, have you been feeling this way for awhile, or is this just a bad day? There's no need to make yourself feel worse thinking there's 'A Problem' with you if it's just a reaction to stress or hormones.

yeah, a bad day, I think. Took me by surprise. stress and hormones are likely culprits.

I'm in England until December 2008. At this point I can't really afford to go home to Virginia, much less travel halfway across the States to see my Grandpa.

I've resigned myself to the fact that I'll just call and write as often as possible.

Nothing like the people with real problems, just venting.

Just feel really down and everything is hard work.
After I've typed this (which is how I really feel) I will go over to the Happy thread and try to come up with an equal amount. I feel like Eeyore and Marvin the Paranoid Android's unloved red headed step child at the moment though.

England just lost 3-2 to Croatia so we're not going to Euro 08
It's not snowing here and probably won't again in my lifetime
I never have enough money but my Doc advises me against working yet - and if I took on something part-time I would be worse off
But I do feel like I want to work very soon, just don't want to start and fuck it up - I feel low enough about myself as a person as it is
I feel fat and ugly and moany and unlovable
I feel like going downstairs and eating my big block of Cathedral City Reduced Fat Mature Cheddar - with pickle. Bite by bite.

Okay, I think I'm done.
So you see, nothing really - just bad wiring in my brain. As you were.
(except England - that's not my fault)

Apparently Minifob discovered the concept of "homesickness" for the first time this evening. Everything was going fine in the standard bedtime routine, right up until the minute he figured out he was supposed to sleep in the travel crib (as he always has when we travel, but the last time was probably 3-4 months ago.) He completely freaked out and bolted for the front door screaming "Car car car! Go go go! Bed! Bed!" Took forever to calm him down and ultimately he passed out from exhaustion more than anything.

only 4 more days w/my family:(

Hey Sunday, can you do some volunteer work? Maybe clerk in a charity shop or something? You're right that it would make you feel better to be doing something and will help when you go for a full time job.

The fact that the secret santa hasn't been organized yet even though I suggested it should be done sooner in order for those of us who are geographically challenged to participate.

also, I'm just generally pissed off and exhausted and there's no end in sight.

Sometimes I just wish I could go to sleep and not wake up.

We still have time babba, promise. Monster is hyper organised and it is only 23 November. If worst comes to worst you & me will exchange something okay? You get the short straw receiving wise but I'll already have my present :)

I'm sure it'd be lovely either way mate. I just want to know who I'm buying/making for so I know what to do. I just wanted to do something a bit personalized if possible, but that requires a bit of thought usually, but there'll be no time to put into it. That's all. Anyway, no point saying anything. Maybe I'll just withdraw. I'm not in a good frame of mind for xmas right now anyway.

Grrr... We had occasion to write this delightful little email to my stepkids' mother this evening (background--my stepson is severely allergic to peanuts):

Just wanted to send you a quick note about something [stepdaughter] said this weekend, regarding the incident last Christmas where [stepson] may have eaten a bite of a cookie made with peanut butter. (You may recall that we told you about it at the time: though he did not have any outward reaction, because he said the cookie tasted “spicy” we rinsed his mouth and brushed his teeth thoroughly and kept a close eye on him just in case.)
This weekend [stepdaughter] mentioned to us that you had said we were “lying,” and that you believed [stepson] had actually had a severe reaction and “his face was actually all swollen and stuff.” As we told [stepdaughter], we don’t really care if what she said is true or not—we are never interested in hearing gossip about your house, and at any rate both of them were there at the time and we will trust them to decide what they saw with their own eyes. But we wanted to let you know she said it, in case you want to have a talk with her about either making up things you never said, or repeating things you never intended for us to hear, whichever is more appropriate.


We're still going to sit on it for a few days before deciding if it actually gets sent, or if it just got written to blow off steam.

This would be the tirade I was referring to in the secret santa thread. it's perfectly well organized, just because you didn't get what you want when you wanted it doesn't make it a freaking disaster. This assumption that I'm not on top of it is insulting and I deserve an apology. Fat chance of ever getting that. :rolleyes:

Nobody else has moaned about the time line, you did not ask for an extra week as you claimed and i was not unresponsive. you were just having a shitty tantrum, but now that you feel better it doesn't make it ok for me.

see, here's the convo:

fairly reasonable response, i'd say. Reasonable question. If you had responded it was outside the mailing dates, I'd have moved it.

oh, no answer.... I ask again and instead i get:

and

and

and

I'd call that a fucking tirade too. had you thought about waiting for a response? or looking up the mailing dates on line? No, it's all my fault because you don't get it the way you want it. it's bloody thanksgiving week here. a holiday. You want me to tell my long-awaited guests to piss off while I satisfy your need for instant gratification? You were just being totally unreasonable. But instead of admitting that -even though you admitted you were having a shitty moment:
you spit the binky and muddy the waters. you could have asked to be removed in a PM. but no, you have to make it like a public declaration of my incompetance to make you feel more justified in your ridiculous tantrum.

I'm sorry you pulled out, in my opinion -and clearly the opinion of others- 1st of Dec is plenty of time to get a small airmail gift delivered internationally. If it doesn't fit your schedule or your wallet, then decline gracefully, don't make me out to be the baddie.

There, that's what's pissing me off right now.

monster, if you feel slighted by me in any way then I am truly sorry for that.

My question was simply because I know how slow Australia Post can be and I've been caught by xmas mailing before. I did not want that to happen in this case because to me xmas is special and I like everything to be perfect. That's my issue not yours, but it's why I worry about getting gifts in the mail ahead of time. It's not a chore for me to buy someone a present and it does suit me to do so. In fact, buying the gifts is one of my favourite things about xmas. My comment about the expense of it was not for my own benefit but for those of us who would like to participate but may not be as financial as others. I did not name anyone specific because I would consider that rude and insensitive.

If you think my request was unreasonable, then so be it. I will tell you now though, that if I had for a second, thought I was being unreasonable, I never would have asked.

So in conclusion, now that you've had your say, please let this be the end of it. It'd be nice if the others who're looking forward to it could do so without this hanging over their heads.

Thankyou for volunteering to manage the secret santa. I'm sure you'll do a great job.

Stupid.... fucking.... football... jerks.

:dedhorse:

Thanks, Ali.

yes, overland is ludicrously unreliable in most countries. Like you say, usually at least 6 weeks. And that's why it just wasn't an option for this year and I was preaching about keeping the packets light. If you want back in, it's no problem, but it will have to be airmail. Or something bought mail order from the country of your recipient....

...and santa takes care of everybody, so don't worry -I'm sure everybody who has been good will get something ;) (those who've been bad already got theirs :eek:)

I'll just sit this one out. but thanks for the thought.

today? The barrage when I click new posts. I'm getting used to clicking User CP but I know I'm missing good stuff. I was really lucky to notice that the wolf is back on the prowl.

lots of posts upset you? why do you click User CP? I only click that when I want to change my signature or something.

It is moving fast tonight - I only have the laptop til HM wakes up on the sofa and decides to go to bed (or I get tired and go to bed myself)

I'll be gutted if I don't get to the top of the new posts list by then!
Still, it's mostly the same threads in their death spasms I think.

Also don't get why you click User CP btw

user CP lists the threads in reverse chronology that people have posted in after you have. Easy way to follow up on something you were involved in.

New Posts lists all threads with new posts since your last visit.

hmm. I'll try that, thanks! I always just click new posts.

ETA: No, I don't click New Posts. I click Quick Links--Today's posts.

2 new things to try!

I find too many threads started by one particular person annoying because I know when one of you has something important and true to say, I'll probably miss it. It was suggested to me that if I click User CP I can look at the threads I'm already subscribed to so I don't accidentally ignore someone, but I'll miss the new stuff.

The fact that I can't be happy.

why can't you be happy?

Hi Ameliabedelia!

:welcome:

Welcome to the cellar
And :comfort: sit down and have a cup of tea/coffee/whiskey. What's up? Or what's down, as the case may be?

Be warned, though, people ARE going to shorten your username. It sounds like something Harry Potter would say.
If you have a particular shortening you prefer, out with it now.

Amelia Bedelia is a classic American children's book character, Zen. :)

Oh, right.
Thanks.
I thought it was a spell to turn you into a pioneering aviatrix who promptly disappears.

Because people keep shortening ab's nickname. oops... sowwy.