Thanks, Jim, I'm really enjoying the Scotch. I don't know what I would have done without your assistance.

how does the person who drives the snow plough get to work?

He flies through the air holding a snowman's hand.

what does cheese say when it gets it's picture taken?

Simile!

Is it proper to sing "White Christmas" at a Kwanzaa observance?

Is it possible to have a crush on everyone from the cellar simultaneously?

Yes, but it is only permissible to share the most intimate photos with one...Elspode.

if a hen and a half can lay an egg and a half in a day and a half, then how long does it take a cricket with a wooden leg to kick all the seeds out of a dill pickle?

Didn't that used to be a monkey?

Does a busybody's house have mirrors?

How do gay exhibitionist agoraphobics ever come out of the closet?

If you see a lawyer drowning should you:
a) read a book
or
b) go to a movie?

Are you looking at me?

Is that a camera!?