Yeah......

Methinks the question is not just what, but where.
The what: my 22yo girlfriend.
The where: where my wife can find me.

Carbs are my foil too. What do they do to you? Or, rather, why are they problematic?

I am diabetic.

When I went low(-er) carb, it was interesting to see what was easy/hard to give up. Rice? Easy. Bread? Eh, middlin'. Pasta? Tough, but good workarounds exist. Potatoes? WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!:cry:

Atkins was a criminal.
Telling to put people into ketosis is a criminal act for a Dr.

The end of the low carb craze has put a serious crimp in my drinking though, can't find low carb bacardi drinks anymore :(

I shouldn't drink wine after eating a hot curry. It does really bad stuff to my guts. :thepain:

second helpings.

Several years ago I went to San Fransisco and was taken to The Stinking Rose restaurant. Man o man that was some of the best grub I've put in my mouth. However, no one warned me about the side affects of the "stinking rose" so I did not use any restraint at the table. The next day I had meetings all day and had to deal with the worse gas I have EVER had. And in case you want to know, the restraunt motto is:"We Season Our Garlic With Food!"

I shouldn't drink vodka.
It brings the police to my door at 03.00

Okay, settle down comfortably children, I am going to tell you a story.

I bought some vodka from the local shop. I usually drink beer, but I fancied some vodka & Diet Coke and as I knew I wasn't working the next day I wasn't fussed about not sleeping (from the caffeine I mean).

Now this was cheap vodka, but hell - that's par for the course as far as my tastebuds are concerned! So I was a little surprised when this stuff quite so grim. Not only did it have a foul taste, it seems to have a slightly oily texture in that the taste coated my throat and got into my nasal cavity. Bleugh.

I finished it anyway, after all it was a finite source and I'd paid for it.

But then I find myself on the sofa, nothing on TV, nothing I am in a condition to read, the oily taste in my mouth and regretting mixing it with enough Diet Coke (in a desperate attempt to kill the taste) to keep me awake until Ragnarök.

So I idly text my housemate-to-be saying that I'd had some really grim vodka and now couldn't sleep. I lightheartedly (!) wrote, "If I'm found dead 2moro demand an autopsy - it's poison not suicide!"

And after a bit I decide I'll try to sleep again, switch off my phone and go to bed.

Fast forward to approx 03.00. I've sort of spoiled the surprise for you, but believe me it was in full effect for me when it was happening. First came the ringing of the doorbell. I also hear the upstairs doorbell ring. I lie there heart pounding thinking - thank goodness the OAP upstairs is out, I'd hate for her to be woken up like this. I thought it was drunken students playing knock & run on their way home from the clubs in town.

Then comes the pounding on the windows of my living room (front of the flat). Oh crikey, I think. If I stay in here they can't get me. But what if the flat is on fire? What if there's a gas leak or a bomb in the area? I'll have to go and look. Terrified.

As I left the bedroom I could see the blue flickering light of the police car outside the flat, and somehow this relieved me. I'm not sure why exactly, perhaps just knowing I was in official hands now.

I opened the door a crack - a little bleary:
Policeman: Hello there. We're looking for [full formal name, pronounced incorrectly].
SG: Hello, yes?
PC: Have you been sending text messages?
SG: No!?
At this point I think I'm about to be hauled off to Gitmo
PC: To someone in London?
SG: No! Oh..... Ah....
PC: He was very worried about you. Asked us to check you were okay. Something about your drink being spiked?
SG: Argh, no, misunderstanding, sorry, erm, I'm okay, sorry, OMG, sorry
PC: Yes, well he said you weren't the sort of person to play practical jokes [WTF?] I think you should give him a call and let him know you're okay...

Anyway, off they went, leaving me mortified in my dressing gown. I switched my phone on to find 8 text messages in increasing degrees of panic, and a voicemail message saying he was calling the police right now. Turns out the text didn't hit his phone until 01.30 and it seemed so out of character for me to be texting at that time he decided it must be a cry for help.

Sigh.

We've forgiven eachother for the terrible scare we both got.
No more vodka for SG. At least not for a while :)

Very good story, Sundae Girl. I'm glad I don't drink nasty oily vodka. They should put this as a warning label on the bottles.

Great friend, though.

I should not eat tinned smoked eel.
I should not eat tinned smoked eel.
I should not eat tinned smoked eel.
I should not eat tinne...

Somebody actually smokes eel and puts it in a tin???????? :greenface

Yep. You can get it at most Asian markets. I think it's more Chinese, but don't know what region. It's, um, interesting.

Pass the oily vodka.