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a whole different discussion:
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I disagree with the basic premise that parenting does not have an effect on the grown adult.
For example I know that myself and my siblings have a deep rooted "don't disturb the neighbours" attitude instilled in us by our mother. In me, this evidences itself as a belief that other people's opinions and happiness are more important than mine, and their opinion of me is the most important benchmark in my life. I live in terror of being judged harshly by the outside world and it has affected my job choices as well as general day to day life. It was when I met a beautiful, witty, kind and generally all round great person who told the same stories as me and had the same ridiculously low opinion of herself that I realised perhaps this was a shared element in our pasts. Yup - her Mum was exactly the same (at least in that regard). Her story was complicated by a divorce, a natural father that showed no interest and a stepdad who had to be pleased at all costs, but I could certainly see parallels in our approach to the world. I'm not blaming my Mum for my problems - I know my Nan instilled the same attitude in her - but I definitely believe that the values were taught and not endemic. |
If nurture didnt matter I'd be listening to emopop-mallpunk right now rather than classic rock.
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I didn't have anything to do with him learning the guitar. Us parents can take the credit for everything good. ;) |
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Fair enough Flint. The point was and still is, that it's pretty much impossible to ever really know the truth because it's an impossible experiment to conduct. |
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Well, as sociologists can't even agree on what the 'definition' of culture is, I think they'll have a long way to go before they sort this one out.
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I am a strong supporter of social factors. I have seen many people, including myself, change personalities and their view on life just from hanging out with different people.
Genetics still plays a role, some people will be independant no matter who they hang out with, some people will be leeches no matter they hang out with. It depends on the person usually... |
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There's plenty of evidence to suggest pretty much any side of this multi-sided argument.
There's no doubt peers have a profound effect on the thoughts and habits of the group. There's also no doubt that different styles of parenting effect a childs world view. There's also no doubt that genetics play a big role too. The thing there is doubt about is how much influence each of these factors have. I would say that research suggests that the answer is, it depends on what stage of life the child/young adult is at. |
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As I said, it's a combination of many factors. I believe it would be slightly dangerous to suggest that parents have no influence at all.
From my perspective, I know my parents influenced the way I turned out in many ways. I wouldn't be who I am today if I had had different parents. I think most people would say that. Sometimes it's a great idea to look at yourself and think about your own influences and there you'll find the answer. |
I don't know, I have seen studies that suggest kids do turn out differently according to parenting style. I can't just get myself to believe that a kid will turn out the same if his or her parents ignore him or her as if the same kid had parents that were watching and regulating his or her every move.
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