I like men to be the Dom.

I'd have to disarm her first. There will be no whipping, from anyone. The only pain allowed is conscience in the morning.... after breakfast.

You seen that American commercial where this guy wakes up and looks at the woman he is sleeping next to? Then he is like :thepain: and silently tip toes out of bed only to see a picture of him and his kids, and then another one of him and the woman on their wedding day. Hah, pretty hilarious. Forgot what the commercial was for though.

But what if she doesn't swallow?

swallowing is a sign of love.
no im actually not kidding

Ummmm. Being as you're not kidding I have to disagree. Love has nothing to do with it.

I swallow. I've said it before and I don't mind it being public knowledge.
But there was one man I couldn't swallow with. I loved him deeply, but he had the bitterest tasting semen I have ever encountered. It was a long term relationship and I cared for him deeply, so we did discuss it. Not even a change of diet had any effect (and after all we lived together so I knew that he didn't eat anything all that different from other men I'd been involved with).

Anyway, enough seriousness, back to innuendo.

I'm very direct when it gets to that point, just like everything else I do.
"Wanna' make love or fuck real hard?"
Usually works.

You don't always have to fuck her hard
In fact sometimes that's not right to do
Sometimes you've got to make some love
And fuckin give her some smoochies too

Sometimes ya got to squeeze
Sometimes you've got to say please
Sometime you've got to say hey

I'm gonna Fuck you softly
I'm gonna screw you gently
I'm gonna hump you sweetly
I'm gonna ball you discreetly

And then you say hey I bought you flowers
And then you say wait a minute sally
I think I got somethin in my teeth
Could you get it out for me
That's fuckin teamwork
Whats your favorite posish?
That's cool with me
Its not my favorite
But I'll do it for you
Whats your favorite dish?
Im not gonna cook it
But ill order it from Zanzibar

And then I'm gonna love you completely
And then I'll fuckin fuck you discreetly
And then I'll fucking bone you completely
But then
I'm gonna fuck you hard. Hard!

clobble, the fact that you;re a tenacious d fan adds llike.....80 points to your coolness quotient.....

Shit, yeah... I could have typed all those lyrics from memory, but I was typing one-handed with the kid on my lap doing alphabet videos on the other half of the screen at the time, so it was just more prudent to copy-n-paste.

This is just a tribute
You gotta believe me
And I wish you were there
Just a matter of opinion.

Good stuff