I'm sorry, I'd love to describe the color and shape of the bruise to you and all that, but I can't differentiate it from all the other bruises that are currently living on my shins.

experiment? you need an experiment for that?

**ALERT**

Highlight at your peril:


"No, Paul." She moved to the door and then turned, looking at him with that stony face. Only her eyes, those tarnished dimes, were fully alive under the shelf of her brow. "There is one thought I would like to leave you with. You may think you can fool me, or trick me; I know I look slow and stupid. But I am not stupid, Paul, and I am not slow." Suddenly her face broke apart. The stony obduracy shattered and what shone through was the countenance of an insanely angry child. For a moment Paul thought the extremity of his terror might kill him. Had he thought he had gained the upper hand? Had he? Could one possibly play Scheherazade when one's captor was insane? She rushed across the room at him, thick legs pumping, knees flexing, elbows chopping back and forth in the stale sickroom air like pistons. Her hair bounced and joggled around her face as it came loose from the bobby-pins that held it up. Now her passage was not silent; it was like the tread of Goliath striding into the Valley of Bones. The picture of the Arc de Triomphe cracked affrightedly on the wall. "Geeeee-yahhh!" she screamed, and brought her fist down on the bunched salt-dome that had been Paul Sheldon's left knee. He threw his head back and howled, veins standing out in his neck and on his forehead. Pain burst out from his knee and shrouded him, whitely radiant, in the center of a nova. She tore the typewriter off the board and slammed it down on the mantel, lifting its weight of dead metal as he might have lifted an empty cardboard box. "So you just sit there," she said, lips pulled back in that grinning rictus, "and you think about who is in charge here, and all the things I can do to hurt you if you behave badly or try to trick me. You sit there and you scream if you want to, because no one can hear you. No one stops here because they all know Annie Wilkes is crazy, they all know what she did, even if they did find me innocent." She walked back to the door and turned again, and he screamed again when she did, in anticipation of another bull-like charge, and that made her grin more widely. "I'll tell you something else," she said softly. "They think I got away with it, and they are right. Think about that, Paul, while I'm in town getting your cockadoodie paper." She left, slamming the bedroom door hard enough to shake the house. Then there was the click of the lock. He leaned back in the chair, shaking all over, trying not to shake because it hurt, not able to help it. Tears streamed down his cheeks. Again and again he saw her flying across the room, again and again he saw her bringing her fist down on the remains of his knee with all the force of an angry drunk hammering on an oak bar, again and again he was swallowed in that terrible blue-white nova of pain. "Please, God, please," he moaned as the Cherokee started outside with a bang and a roar. "Please, God, please - let me out of this or kill me . . . let me out of this or kill me." The roar of the engine faded off down the road and God did neither and he was left with his tears and the pain, which was now fully awake and raving through his body.

-- Misery, Stephen King

I had to put the book down, walk around the room and breathe deeply for several minutes after reading this passage. Even now, years later, I get the heebie jeebies from this chilling, nauseating memory.

Please. We didn't HAVE mice. :3eye:

I would suggest that if you can find a guy with the ability to rest his "good old whang on the knee" you might consider dating him. Mine does not quite my knee, but it is close.

:lol2:

%$#@&*%@!!!/hopping on 1 leg

dude, that's gross. In England, "whang" is a euphemism for hemorrhoid.

I jumped out of a plane at 1250 feet yesterday and bounced my whole body off the ground. (I did use a parachute). The trip down was peaceful, the bounce on the ground sucked pond water with a crazy straw, I always hit like a sack of bricks.

Does that count toward your experiment?

I did that for a few years. See your PM.

Sorry, I forgot to post last Friday's participatory experiment.

Go crunch you knee against a heavy desk, brick wall, or the corner of your porch. Alternately, you can hit it with the claw end of a claw hammer, or with an ice ax. Aim for the center of the knee cap.

The Cellar awaits your report.

I regularly turn in my office chair and bring one knee or the other into unexpected and forceful contact with the descending edge of my desk, the part where the drawers are.

Here's my report on doing that on purpose...go fuck yourself, sadist. :headshake

Lets see Knee cap displaced by jumping off a Duce and a 1/2 with a 35 lb tracker from a Dragon

Both shins looking like I was in a fight with a midget with a Billy club from weed eating with a 4 stroke weed eater with shorts on ,

Got both of these covered ,

NEXT !!!

I see you saved the equipment from harm. Good job.

Damn! I tried, but instead I stubbed my toe!!!!!!!!!!

That's excellent! I was going to post a toe stub experiment for this week. Sunday night, I kicked a cabinet with my little to so hard that it drove the nail right through the bone.

At least, that's how it felt.

I'm still limping.