Seriously - I chose the latter after much kicking and screaming. At first most things were someone else's fault. After more reflection, and alot of Crow a la carte.... Smiles come, and happiness can be followed by true joy. And there is a huge difference to me.

No Crow au Vin?
(... a crow that has been run iver by a van...)
thanks Blackadder for that one

Glad to hear it's possible, Classic.
75% of me just says, "never again" and accepts it.
The other 25% comes out in my dreams and wakes up longing.

I loved Blackadder! Another of my addictions to Brit TV. :D

You can do it SG. Listen to what people post on here. There are people her who reek of the inability to get over personal failings and project them on to anyone they dislike. Life is much to short for that shit.

That 25 percent will get you every time.

It's out there, if it isn't for you it isn't for any of us. :)

SG, I seriously never thought I'd ever find someone to love after almost 6 years of being single, but it took me that long to really honestly get myself anywhere near where I needed to be to let love come into my life again. Then I met Dazza when I wasn't even looking for love and he's helped me scrape off the last of the shit and slime from the past to the point where I can really feel that sense of complete happiness with him, even when he's annoying the shit out of me (if that makes any sense).

I just think that when you start to think you might want to bring love into your life, you're probably almost there, particularly if you're logical about your thought processes at the same time.

Bruce, thanks for the OP. I thought it was beautiful in a sad way. I guess we all sometimes have things that we just never realized until it was just too late. I think it's part of the human condition.

That 25% may be the addiction talking - trying to lull you back into its dark grasp. Saying things like "You're not worthy...You'll never succeed... I'm you're only friend... Just one drink... Rinse repeat lose years of your life. JMO.

Break the cycle! Kick it in the cunt and live!

That was so sad!

*smiles* I'm not sure I really do regrets as such. There are things that didn't go as I would have hoped. I can get quite misty eyed thinking back to younger days, and the closeness I felt to my man then. I can't imagine ever feeling that kind of closeness again...but that's ok. It was a young thing. It was almost a sublimation of the self.

I know I'll never feel that kind of intensity, because I am not prepared to lose myself in someone. That loss tastes sweet at the time, but there is a cost. An affordable cost when the years weigh light, less so when you get older.


[eta] thinking about it, I don't ever want to love someone so much that I would die or kill for them. I have only ever loved that way once. Thankfully, when that love lost its glamour, there was a solid friendship left. Solid enough that I would probably still die or kill for him; for different reasons.

You were stoned. :haha:

What, for 12 years?....oh, wait a minute..yeah.

♪ I did it myyyyyy wayyyyyyyyy ♫

Sorry. The "regrets" title touched it off.

I'm feeling better now.

To be fair to myself, I have not been in a proper relationship for 10 years now because I haven;t felt that the time was right. Oh and because no-one fancies me..
Are we talking about being in an adult and consenting situation, or did you think this was a metaphor for drinking?

If it's drink, I understand completely.
If it's love I think you might be being a bit harsh...
It kinda assumes I will be alone for the rest of my life.
Something I often assume myself, but which sounds a bit mean coming from someone else.

Have you hear the Gypsy Kings' version of that? That's what I want played at my funeral ...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7T1VQ5X-y-I (sound quality not great but the best of three online versions I've just reviewed ...) (and how do you do that video embed thingie?)

Put the part in red between [youtube] tags.

I thought it was a metaphor...