I did adopt a donkey once, though the BLM called them burros.
I gave him the super-original name of Jack.
He was a nice guy, but couldn't shoot free throws for shit.

Nope, you take the shot, they just bray you make it.

Haw haw, Bruce.

I worked at a summer camp. We had a camp donkey that was sharp as a tack. I can guarantee those Donkey Ball donkeys are not suffering in the least. I suspect the are amused by it all.

The Camp Donkey got loose one day and I was dispatched to catch it with another guy. It was chowing down on the front lawn grass. It saw us coming and waited until we were within about 6 feet of it before putting its plan in play. While still munching, it bolted one hundred feet directly to the parking lot filled with cars that was also a lawn. Once there it re-commenced eating. We proceeded over to the lot thinking, 'now we have you'. But, that donkey played us like fish for about 45 minutes using the cars as barriers.

Two people! And it kept us from cornering it. It was like playing against a chess master. It did this while placidly grabbing mouthfuls of grass the whole time. We finally got three more people to help. It looked at us and never moved again. It obviously was either full or did the math. We walked right up to it and put on its halter. Damn smart, yes-sir-ree.

You mean "Hee Haw," don't you?