I'll be home tomorrow. I'll drop it off on the way ...

Photographic Evidence
 

Although I should be sleeping right now because I have an event to attend tomorrow, I felt it was more important to share the pictures of my culinary adventure. (Finally got 'em downloaded and sorted)

First, this is birdzilla mocking me from the cold confines of the nonfunctional oven ...

http://www.alexandersguns.com/eva/naked_turkey.JPG

Stupid Bird. It should have know better than to issue such a challenge. I'll show YOU, dammit ...

http://www.alexandersguns.com/eva/cooked_turkey.JPG

I triumphed in the face of adversity. :)

http://www.alexandersguns.com/eva/carcass3.JPG

(I also intimidated it with a very large butcher knife)

*That* is one big turkey! Have you managed to adquately distriute the leftovers so that you and yours are neither (1) kept perpetually sleepy from the effects of l-tryptophan, nor (2) poisoned by that last bit that ends up sitting in the fridge for four weeks, tempting you to reheat it in the microwave, thus activating all the malicious little bacteria?

So I threw a stuffed porkchop in the oven, set it to 350 and walked away. I watched abit of TV and heard what sounded like a dripping noise. I walked over to the oven and heard what sounded like bubbling liquid. I thought that was strange since I had only just put it in the oven. I opened the oven and was temporariliy blinded. The bottom element had cracked somehow, and was arcing. I had no idea that could happen. It was pretty entertaining once I stopped my George Carlin impression and turned the oven off.

I ended up searing the chop in a pan on the stovetop and finishing it in the microwave. It was edible but a little tough. I called the maintenence guy to fix the element. He had it replaced in short order. Short -- electricity. Ha! I mean quickly.

Heh hee heh...
That's why I have a toaster oven, too.:cool: There ain't a damn thing in my kitchen that can break without me having a way around it... (I think I have the right number of negatives in that sentence...)

- Pie

PS: I mean, pork-chop wise. If it were that mega-bird, I'd have to resort to asking my dearest to fire up the Webber... Which we did, this T'giving. Only 15 lbs, tho.

Uryoces ... I think your cooking involved more actual adventure than mine did.

I didn't get fireworks. (Very nearly some gunfire ... luckily I haven't any significant anger management issues and settled for kicking the stove rather than trying out the 12-gauge on it. Besides, I know how far I can push my honey's landlord. That would have been TOO far.)

----

Pie ... I would have gone to the Walmart (and I HATE Walmart) and purchased whatever was necessary (up to and including a Ron Popiel ShowTime Rotisserie) but I was attempting to limit the number of unnessary appliances. I might have a turkey fryer setup on standby if this EVER happens again, however.

Aaah... I dislike unnecessary appliances, too. I actually use the toaster oven more than the regular one, anyways -- it's a lot more efficient when cooking for two. Also, my "real" oven is gas. It burns the food on one side, leaves it raw on the other. :confused:

I grew up in a vegetarian household. This last year was only the second time I tried to cook turkey, in any form. Thank (whatever deity you believe in) for cookbooks!

My cat grew up thinking that humans didn't eat anything a feline would be interested in. I remember her surprise, the first time I cooked a pork roast... She thought it was all for her. :)

- Pie

Guy over in your Honeys territory burned his house down Christmas Day with a turkey fryer. A bad scene but nobody got hurt.

Probly anybody but a damn Poole woulda known not to set the fryer up in the kitchen ...

(I hadn't actually heard about that, but probably underlines the importance of reading ALL the instructions AND following them. And replacing the unstable tripod base that comes with the turkey fryer. I saw THAT footage on ActionNews ...)

I live for unnecessary kitchen appliances. My apartment's kitchen is small enough that someday it will collapse under the weight of my accumulated grills and gadgets.

(The George Foreman Contact Roaster is surprisingly effective, though not large enough for the likes of Birdzilla above. It's got about a 4-5 pound limit, but it's perfect for eye roasts, pork loin, stuffed flank steaks, and small-to-medium chickens and related poultry.)

I also live for unnecessary kitchen appliances. (The primary issue here was reducing the level of impact on my boyfriend's residence. I am, naturally, marking my territory in the small ways (leaving a toothbrush and a distinctive girly towel), but I'm not at the brand new appliance level (okay, I did take up a coffee maker, but it wasn't a NEW one).

In my own home I have a cappucino maker, several other specialty coffee makers, a George Foreman Grill (family size with bun warmer), one of those sandwich maker doo dads, two ice cream machines ...

Only my lack of counter and closet space has kept me from having nearly every stupid accessory cooking device out there. (even though I know full well that I really only ever use the microwave).

I want one of those Showtime Rottiserie grills ... one of my (male) coworkers has one ... he swears by it. Works just like on TV.

I was even looking longingly at this home quesadilla maker thing I saw and ad for last week. I don't eat quesadillas OUT that often, but the thought of being able to make it in my own home.... whoo hoo!

The utimate must have unnecessary kitchen appliance however, is the Cotton Candy maker. I've wanted it since I was a kid. It has greater appear for me even that the Snoopy Snowcone Machine and the Easy-Bake Oven. Cotton candy ANYTIME YOU WANT. What could be cooler than that?

ima gadget addict myself. the thing is, ive found that most of those gadgets do a real good job. like my breadmaker. the bread is okay, i guess, but it comes out much better when i do it all myself. i hate the foreman grill i got. it got too hot too fast, and so the outside of the meat would get done, but not the inside. my favourite gadgets tho are my ice cream maker, pasta maker and food processor. i cant live without those.

~james

The outside is almost crispy brown, the inside not done? Sounds like a perfect steak to me.

unless its chicken :)

actually, i hate steak when its served still bleeding. medium-well is as far as im willing to go.

~james

If a steak isn't "well done," it wasn't done well, IMHO. I'm not shy about sending it back if I see pink, much less red.

The Foreman grill isn't too bad for steaks, as long as they're reasonably thin. Thick steaks may well be blackened before the center hits the right temperature. (I haven't tried the newer models with the temp-control slider on the lid.)

The Foreman roaster has been _superb_ for avoiding that black-outside-red-inside fate with eye roasts -- I've cooked two so far, and both have been moist and well-cooked throughout without charring the outside at all.