Then you have people like my sister who thinks the ENTIRE world, and I do mean world, revolves around her. She just turned 46 and she still doesn't have a clue. She treats her husband as the third wheel to her and her daughter. Whenever they go to family functions, they take two cars. They never spend time together and if they do it is doing something SHE wants to do.

So on valentines day he says he wants out and she doesn't understand why. :confused:

I think love can overcome all the bagagge that an older lover carries. That also includes my baggage! I feel i am a lucky woman. btw, amygail simply a internet nick.

Soulmates don't exist until you find one. Only when one abandons the idea of a soulmate can one be truly content in a relationship.

That was very Zen ;)

What the hell is a soulmate? Do peoples souls mate? I think as long as they continue to make erectile -enhancing medications this will continue. I doubt you saw many 60 year old men in the 60s' with 30 year old women. Come to think of it, I bet the guy's inventing this stuff are all over 50 years old... Think about it. :mad:

I found my soul mate, he is 26 years older than me. say what you say but you cant go against love. we both KNOW there is a huge age gap..and that our future will have some struggles ( no kids or divorces on both sides), we are planning to get married. he is older than both of my parents. yet we are in a harmonious relationship and are happy together. there is nothing wrong with dating older men or older women for that matter if they can provide emotionally. of course there is financial stability (in most cases) too that is attractive and convinient. there are no rules, we make our life to be what it is and we ought to love the opportunity it gives us to share a life with someone we truly love. so why not?

I'm a seperated 41 year old man and she is 23. We met about 6 months ago and have been dating for 2 months now. I have never been the type of guy where sex ruled my world or my relationships. The thought of being with someone 18 years younger than I never even occurred to me. She pursued me and I declined many times before finally accepting. I have never been happier nor can I believe that she wants ME, just me! For all you doubters, I am not wealthy nor do I hold a position of power in any way. She loves me for the person I am and that is the best thing that life has to offer. I hope to be with her forever. This is the most unusual and wonderful relationship I've ever had, and the issues of age and maturity are there, but we're gonna try and work them out together. Issues like kids (I have 3) have been discussed. She has lupus and cannot have children, but adoption has been discussed. We agree on so many things that I feel this is worth giving a real shot. My greatest concern is that I'll really mess up her life. Feedback??? Please!

Sure. But I need some more information. Please don't skip any questions.
How long ago (in months) did you become separated?
Why are you separated?
What are the ages of your children?
Why do you think you might mess up her life?
Why did you choose the word feedback?
What "feedback" has your best friend given you?
Lastly, tell us one thing you would prefer not to tell us.

Wow. I like the way Beestie thinks.

Marvelous.

(to borrow a word from the Word Ass. Thread)

See, me, I woulda just jumped on the 'feel good' vibe and never looked back. I need and appreciate the more level-headed in our midst.

kudos, Beestie. And, yesman? You'd be wise to consider the questions.

yesman065, when you're ready to retire she'll be in her late 40s and hot to trot. What a great retirement that will be. :jig:

How long ago did you become separated? = 21 months
Why are you separated? = Because my wife Lied constantly, Stole often and cheated repeatedly.
What ages are your children? = 17,15, 14
Why do you think you might mess up her life? = Cuz of the age issues
Why did you choose the word feedback? = Hoping to get more insightful responses than the typical ones.

What "feedback" has your best friend given you? = That he's very happy for me and that if she really makes me happy and I her then to " Never let her go"
Lastly, tell us one thing you would prefer not to tell us. Thats a really hard one. I am scared to death that she's gonna leave me for someone her age. Actually I expect that at some point. We also work together in a very small office with only 3 other employees.

Oh and for Bruce = At least I'll have taken the chance, loved and been loved - better than being 60+ and regretting what could have been.

Absolutely, don't misunderstand me, I'm on your side. I was saying when you're ready to retire you'll have a paramour that's still ready to have fun and not just sit on the porch and rock. :celebrat:

My feedback, based on your answers, would be to make this woman the happiest woman on the planet and not worry about tomorrow. Nothing lasts forever anyway so rather than worrying about when it might end, fool yourself into thinking it will end seven days from now for every now from now till it ends.

And on the chance this advice has meaning for you, I wouldn't worry about whether you deserve it or not. No one has love because they deserve it anymore than anyone who wins the lottery won because they deserved to win.

Enjoy and worry not. Give yourself to her and do not hedge your bet.

OK all, the soap opera continues. I just found out Saturday night that she didn't really "break up" with her boyfriend - she told me that she told him she wanted to "take a break" to see if he really wanted her and blah, blah, blah. She did say that she was 80% sure she was gonna end it for good. Now she went to his place on Sunday to discuss things with him. I was so upset that I haven't spoken to her since. I've got a bad feeling here. And I want to talk to her so bad, but I think she should call me and tell me what happened and where we stand. Unfortunately, I fell asleep really early last night, so I don't know if she tried to call me or not. UGGGHHHH Ain't love grand!

From my experience, "80%" sure is bullshit. It means she's giving boyfriend #1 a huge chance to redeem himself. He could send her roses and, bingo!-he's redeemed. Give it a wide berth. I smell a rat. I think this woman is playing games to soothe her own ego. She's using people.