Instead of substituting peaches for kiwis, how about we substitute vodka or gin for the fucking semen? How about that?

If you get any of that in my Ninja, you're buying me a new one.

No jiz in the Ninjiz

I've seen the blades on your Ninja, and the bodily fluid that comes to mind is blood, not semen.

Behold: The Jarvis JR-50 Robotic Head Dropper

It's my first time to see this head dropper thing. Here is the product that maybe you haven't seen yet; try checking Inflatable Crescent-Shaped Shampoo, in here.

Genius.

WANT!

I just manufactured my own bent spoon with a piece of dowel. I hope it's not patented or I'm gonna get sued.

I think you're okay, because even if you used an ice tea spoon, yours won't reach the bottom of the glass.

Welcome, spader. Hopefully you're not just here to sell us crescent shaped shampoos, but that is a brilliant device. crazynurse has been complaining about not being able to wash her hair. I have twice described to her a process that is very old-school nurses' aide stuff, the "washrag shampoo," which takes some time (fifteen minutes or so), but uses real shampoo instead of that no-rinse stuff.

I can envision some problems with the inflatable, though. You WILL end up spilling water on the bed, and probably also the patient, when you pull it off the bed, even with the drain.

The Uri Geller Iced Tea Spoon

I seriously didn't know there were pork snuff films! I mean, what's the market for that?

edit: This little piggy went to market...AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Heh-heheh...

Hello? Skulling?

Where it's conveniently sized to fuck it but good. MTP, you'll have to do better than that to cover the Democrats' astronomical doucherie. They count on the hypnotized non compos mentis vote, you know.

Works for a while, maybe... for the rest of us, there is ThoseShirts.com.

The rest of us, you see, realize that the demonizing of the Republicans fails by overreaching, and that the behavior of the Republicans or other conservative groups really does not match the claims made by the hard Left. Which leads us to conclude they are Liars.

1) If you didn't know those types shirts existed 3 years ago, you live with your head up your ass.
2) If you're just now noticing what my sig line says when I probably changed it 3 years ago, then you live with your head up your own ass.
3) If you think YOUR generalizations about [insert political party here] are any different then my generalizations about [insert political party here], then you live with your head up your ass.
4) If you can't address a person with any kind of respect, ever, which I have yet to see you do, then you live with your head up your own ass.
5) If you think that I have ever personally attacked you before this moment, then you live with your head up your own ass.
6) If you don't think I have ever personally attacked you, you have just decided, out of the blue, to personally attack me on NO provocation...then you live with your head up your own ass.

I stay away from the political/current events threads mostly because of you, and just a teensy bit because of other people who don't deserve me calling them out just because you can't keep your hate filled diarrhea to those threads anymore. I have not ever tried to provoke you, and yet you're taking time away from your precious day to seek me out and attack me.

In case I haven't made it clear...you live with your head up your own ass.
LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE.

Republicans: working for government small enough to fit inside your bedroom.

I always thought that was a good thing. j/k

LOL. Yup.

lol - What do Tom Delay, John Kerry, and Products you never knew existed
have in common?

mtp said ug's head is up his butt. I pointed to the first post I could recall when I came to the same conclusion. we agree, but she was far more emphatic.

Oh I know - It was a joke - the link you linked to, linked to you doing it again.
get it - all three had that in common.

takes a bit of the romance out of bacon

Just learned this weekend that my local Cash and Carry offers whole pigs. I'm gonna get a 25 pounder (head included--keep that Jarvis lunatic away from me) and cook it on the smoker.

Skeery....you can eat while it staring at you like that? :eyebrow:

Heck yeah! (I just avoid naming it...)

Here are some interesting pics of smaller piggies:

http://www.google.com/search?q=25+po...w=1280&bih=637

Is it already gutted for you? I hope..

yeah, I can't get one that isn't actually butchered. I've no interest in buying one that isn't dressed out.

All dressed out and nowhere to go...

great.

I *told* you that I can't eat it if it's been named. thanks. thanks a lot.

Be careful with it, V. Cooking a whole pig can be hard to do safely.

We once did that with the Christmas turkey. Y'know, just joking about during prep. Then we dropped a few tabs and none of us were entirely comfortable tucking in to Janice.

I've seen it done with the coals on a tray above the splayed out little feller. Slow cook for a long time, flip him, and the other side doesn't take very long. Delishioso!

A buddy of mine butterflys and sandwiches the pig/deer/goat/whatever between rebar, and flips 'em that-a-way.

WANT

Then we dropped a few tabs and none of us were entirely comfortable tucking in to Janice.

HA !!!

Snopes is always a good places to start.

Does the R2D2 Stein come with her?

What stein?

Dad bought one of these in Yarmouth.
His favourite mixers do not come in mini-cans or in 500ml bottles, just in 330ml cans.
And he does not want to drink a whole can. He's in his 72nd year - liquid weighs heavily on his old bladder!

He's made up.

Bottle Tops

This one may tickle your fancy... but I don't know if this device had made it to market but it certainly came thru the patent process...

.
for those phone calls you can't afford to miss...

http://www.wipo.int/patentscope/sear...ce&maxRec=1002


http://www.wipo.int/patentscope/sear...004356@@@false

I have several of those Bottle Top things. Over here, they're called Snap Caps.

I found them to be immensely useful, as I have a tendency to knock over things on my desk. Saved blow drying a lot of paperwork that way.

When you have to handwrite documentation, which is often following or followed by someone else's handwritten documentation, you can't just "print out a new copy."

another trip to Cash and Carry this morning, and I went into the meat cooler and found a 20 pound cut of beef (beef chuck roll or something). I really only wanted to check it for size. Twenty-fiive pounds of animal will easily fit into my smoker/grill. So now I just need to find some people to cook for, because there's no way I can eat twenty pounds of pork, and I can't freeze it, no more room in the freezer. I'll cook it up and give it away.

Yes, there will be pictures.

I could never use those. I'm obsessive enough that I'd have to wash the can tops first (don't drink from cans most of the time), and that's just an added step...I'm lazy.

I would probably design it differently.

Vibrator with Bluetooth receptor
Application (iPhone/Androïd/whatever) to scan SMS reception

On reception of a specifically formatted message, activation of the Bluetooth link

if you need help with the patent process just give me a call.

err... not on the cell phone tho.. my wife borrowed that last week

Grav I saw some gorgeous hats today.
My acquisitive little fingers fingered them, and their price tags, seeking to justify a purchase...

But I behaved.
I do not need a hat.
I have a hat.
I wear it about five times a year and even than have to take it off if I'm walking as my head gets too hot.
The hat I have, I bought via the internet and have never seen anyone else wearing. Even if I could afford and justify one of the hats I saw today, I would see them on much younger, slimmer girls and feel ashamed.

So.

I'll leave the R2D2 hat and just take the chap underneath.
I don't already have one of those.

Is that glatt under that hat?

It's the glatt in the hat.
By Dr. Suess.

I did wonder.
He's handsome and pointy enough to be Glatt.
But I worried at the last second it he might be Griff, so I didn't comment.

I was trying to figure that out, now I see it. I thought it was PAC man.

You were otherwise occupied from 1977 through 2005, weren't you.

Ted Denslow: Now your kids with your loud music, and your Dan Fogleberg, your Zima, hula hoops and pac-man video games, don't you see? People today have attention spans that can only be measured in nanoseconds!

:lol2:

Sort of.... with Ms. Pac Man and some other recreations.

Couldn't stop laughing while looking at this.

But I've had a couple times where this would have been helpful in answering some of my doctor's questions.

If that guy shaved his head, he would be pretty hot.