When I first coloured my hair purple, and it really didn't take evenly (I recoloured it before posting here) I was tempted to butcher it. It was my Betty Blue moment, but I backed off. I'm not crazy.

No poking eyes out here.

the modest proposal thread. s'good stuff.

Posting to get the three queens together on one page.

the rare trifecta!

:queen: :queen: :queen:

Mildly amusing?

I just got out of a teleconference call with some consultant type person in New York who wanted to know how we do stuff here. Did it as a favor for a head guy at my firm.

Anyway, everyone on this conference was using that business speak thing where you talk for five minutes about something using fancy business lingo when you could just say the damn thing in one sentence in plain English.

At one point they were asking me a question about client's vendors providing metrics for some blah blah blah or other, and it took me a moment to realize they were just asking if we review the work our staff does to make sure it's OK. Is there some sort of lingo course that you take to get through MBA programs?

Is there such a thing as a Quadfecta? If so, I'm in......

:queen::queen::queen::queen:

Here's a gallon of ice cream and a VHS copy of Steel Magnolias. Please open a private chat for the yaya sisterhood of the travelling pants-type comments. thx

Can you please eat a dick? thx

No, but I'll bet you can. Sugar tits.

You're just jealous of the travelling pants 'cause your ass got too big to wear your favorite mini-skirt and now when you wear it you look like a hooker. Ya hooker.

No, but I got some up-kilt shots you can flick your bean to.

Nah, your beans wouldn't turn on my bean.

Let's make three-bean salad, baby. . . . Tossed salad.

Like any other specialty, MBA programs come with a certain amount of technical lingo and instill specialized skills. For worthless bullshit programs like the MBA it's mostly about forming non-committal sentences and emitting profound-sounding logorrhea.

Shawnee and Flint are amusing me today.

But also amusing me is the footy on TV. When a player has exposed blood, they are obliged to leave the field. Play is stopped while that player is substituted. The TV shows a little "Blood Rule" sign in the corner of the screen ... which also includes an ad encouraging people to donate blood to the red cross... dunno why, but I find it amusing...

I run Google Analytics on my cooking blog, mostly because I find useless stats to be very interesting. It will tell you, among other things, the terms that people typed into their search engine that ultimately led them to click on the link to your site.

The best one so far?

ketchup as a lotion

She puts the ketchup on her skin, lest she gets the hose again...

I got an email from The Trading Post today, and the title of it was "Trish, Sell your car for $24.95 today!"

I ask you, who the fuck is going to sell their car for $24.95? Why not just dump it?

Anyway, obviously that wasn't what was meant, but I chose to read it that way and get a giggle out of it. :)

No kidding, one time - in Brisbane, no less - I sold a car for $25.


I'm glad I held out for that last five cents.

oh oh I have such a cute memory from yesterday and there isn't anyway to convey it to it's perfection with words. I guess you'd have to be there but I will try.

I needed a short shovel to mix compost into my soil this fall. I go to a used tool shop because I don't want to spend 5 dollars more on a new shovel, which if it hadn't been for the old time scene I saw, I might have passed on this old rusty thing. So this place is like the house version of someone's old greasy toolbox. Nothing is organized( much ) and scattered in places and I have to step over things and squeeze through but as I do manage to worm my way through I see there is a gathering of little old men at the back. I swear it looked like one of those old time shows where the old men are gathering having a hoot about one thing or another. About 6 men were sitting around a vacant place in one of the counters drinking coffee and laughing about some picture someone got of the internet. The only reason I know that much without snooping is I had to squeeze through to get to the back yard where the yard tools where. It was very Norman Rockwell - esk. I liked it.It amused me very much.


oh and I paid 5 dollars for a very old heavy short shovel but I felt it was worth the privilege of intruding on someone's front for an old mens club.

Ah, so you were the interloper, in the Old Men's Club alert that went out last night. :eyebrow:

ha, I guess I was. A very unexpected rare peek at that!

What a sweet image, sky. :)

I'm finding it mildly ironic that I -a Brit- am paying taxes to the US government on Independance Day (or close enough)

Ha...just send me a check directly. ;)

What's mildly amusing me today?

The fact that someone is still going into the chatroom using my name.

From now on, let it be known that if I go in there, i'll never use my Aliantha handle, nor any dirivitive of it. I will always use something else if and when I do go there.

God some people are fucking thick as planks.

Every morning, I let my two yard chickens out of the greenhouse, then cross the lawn to the actual chicken coop, to let the other birds out for a day of bug eating in their fenced pen.

My banty roo, Marlon, is apparently deeply in love with me, so when I open the door to the greenhouse he goes into his romance dance for a few seconds, then follows me out into the yard. As I make my way across the (large) lawn, Marlon - who is about the size of a 4-week old kitten - runs like hell to keep up with me. I can't tell you how funny this little dork looks, racing along after me, and the fact that he's got a slightly gimpy leg makes it all the more comedic. (Am I going to hell for laughing at my handicapped roo?)


It gets better. Every morning, he's distracted as we pass the front door of the house. There's a big gold-colored kick plate along the bottom of the door, in which Marlon sees gasp! another rooster! ARRGH! ATTACK!!!

Of course, it's his own reflection, so he crashes into the door with a thud and a squawk. :lol2:

He never learns, and I never start a morning without a good laugh.

Oh Glinda please, please film it for us!
Your description was wonderfully evocative, but I'm not familiar enough with roosters to really visualise it - he looks such a shy chap in the pic!

I keep telling myself I'm going to do that... :rolleyes:

I'll put the camera by the door and hopefully I'll remember to take it out with me!

His name isn't Chanticleer?

(and he is a fine looking cock)

:D He got his name by mistake. After he hatched and began growing, I thought he was a girl. I named "her" Marlene, because she always seemed to want to be alone. Then one day she crowed, and Marlon was born.

Thank you, and I'll pass your generous comments his way. ;) He's quite the little stud. *


* He's a purebred bantam Araucana. Weird chickens from South America that lay blue and green eggs.

Good story Glinda. I'm with the 'film it' crew. Sounds like it'd be a good laugh. :)

Glinda, that "tufting" thing on the Araucana looks really interesting from a genetic point of view (as well as an aesthetic pov!) Are your hens also tufted?

They are indeed, but for unknown reasons the males usually have large tufts on both sides of the head but the females often have small tufts on just one side. Additionally, the males usually have no tail feathers, but the females often do have them. My females have one-sided tufts and tails, although I did have one female that had no tufts and no tail (hawk got her :eek: ).

Essentially, purebred Araucana genetics are completely unreliable (two of my banties created a normal sized, bearded hen with a tail - how that happened I can't imagine), except for the blue/green egg gene - that one always comes through.

I'm hoping one of the two females I have now will sit on some eggs this summer, so I can enlarge my little bantam clan.

In the meantime, I got the video! It's not very good (turns out I'm an awful videographer, and jogging backwards is not my best move), but you'll get the idea.

Heeerrrrrrrre's Marlon!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lmlj4g7YNk4

Mildly interesting....

Idiots who think they are about to get better health care.

Great video Glinda, thanks. :thumb:

Marlon is so adorable! Thanks for sharing the video, Glinda...it's improved my mood tremendously.

Marlon is a hoot! :)

Made me smile. Thanks, Glinda!

Glinda - don't take this the wrong way...
But I really laughed at your cock :D

Thanks much for the vid - that' s gotta have a bigger circulation here somehow - let me think of another thread it should be in. And glorious to hear your voice too - very melodious. No wonder all the cocks come running...

And no, I won't tire of cock jokes in this post.

I LOVE that my cock makes you laugh! :D

The best effect is when he's heading directly toward or away from you, so you can see his gimpy leg flipping around - I'll keep trying for a more straight-on view.

And I really have to learn not to breathe when I'm taping - boy is that microphone sensitive!

Funny stuff Glinda!

This review on Amazon gave me a chuckle. I might have assumed that it was intentional humor except for the low rating.

That is pretty funny.

Snork!

And sincere. :lol2:

Holy crap, HM got a shout-out on Boingboing!

Sweet! Go HM!!

Whee! I was wondering why my flickr stats were exploding!

Very cool HM. See, we have the best monkeys.

Somewhere there exists a woman with my first and last name, about my age. Her mother is email-challenged, despite working in a relatively technical field, and routinely sends me emails intended for her daughter. This poor woman has never once responded to my repeated replies that I am not her daughter and she should double-check her email address, so I continue to get these detailed glimpses into someone else's life, including family photos. Apparently the anti-me just had a baby a few days ago. I replied and told the woman to tell her daughter congratulations for me.

Maybe you could set up an automatic "rule" to forward on Mom's emails to the daughter?

can i have her email address please? I'd like to rick roll her.

I was getting e-mails meant for a high school teacher from his students. Some of them containing homework. At first I worked hard to clear up the misunderstandings. Went on intermittently for a year or more. Then I just started deleting them. Deleting them worked faster in my case. I stopped getting them shortly after that. I guess that when students get zeros on homework for failing to turn them in, the teacher realizes there is a serious problem. What teacher uses gmail for work anyway?

gmail offers a mail service for 'your domain' that is just like regular gmail

I have jhelm@whereiwork.com and it was a simple thing to set my main gmail acct to pull emails into it. when i send mail, i can select which address i'm sending it from. slick

Are there adjunct HS teachers? lol

I would, but I don't know the daughter's address, other than it must be similar to mine. The woman's phone number is in her signature, since she emails me from work, so one of these days I suppose I'll get bothered enough to call her on the phone and remind her again that her daughter must be so sad, thinking her mother never emails her and doesn't love her.

Clod, you are seeing the half-empty jar and missing out on a lot of fun. Just reply and tell her all about your

new tatoo
decision to name your child Michael Jackson
tongue piercing
new job as pole dancer
decision to move to the opposite coast
decision to become a lesbian

I'm sure you could think of a lot more.

I too have a problem with gmail doubling up.

I am Zen.Gum at gmail. (not my real address)

Someone else registered ZenGum at gmail. Gmail cheerfully assures me that it is in fact me. Dumbasses.

Every now and then one aimed at him reaches me. One time I got an offer of an internship in a Chicago law office, or something. That one I replied to, to straighten things out, but lately I am ignoring them. If it keeps up, I think I will try Dar's solution. Nice idea.