We've made it as far as Mackinaw today,just short of Michigans Upper Peninsula,but hit a few things on the way.We caught 'The Bottle House',a house constructed from old glass pop bottles in Kalena,well worth the 5 minute detour,then spent a pleasant hour rolling 'backwards' uphill, at a Mystery Hill near Malcolm (MI),that had to be one of the most bizarre experiences I've ever had.Persistence giggled her ass off,but it left me feeling a bit disorientated.
We also visited a Shoe Tree near Kalkaska (about 3 miles north of the town,along US-31),finally finding one at the third time of asking (First time was the wrong place - honestly,who has 2 towns named the same in the same state..lol,second time we tried in the right place,the road was shutoff due to maintainance,third time's the charm.).
We rounded off the day with Persistence haggling a motel down from $99 to $69 for a 3-room suite,with not 1,but 3 TV's,I can watch 'Family Guy' on the toilet,later.Thats been a pretty fine day,even tho its been our first day of cold and lousy weather,but as Brits,we're well hardened to such conditions :D

If you get to my corner of the Rockies (Helena, Montana), give a shout. We don't have healthy food. We don't have beautiful people. But we've got plenty of good hiking and fabulous weather along side a heaping helping of gallows humor from the mining days--Last Chance Gulch, a bullwhacker statue and oversized metal cattle skulls.

Thanks Perry Winkle,we'll bear that in mind...we are visiting Montana later in the trip.

Right now,we're negotiating Illinois,after doing Michigan's U.P and Wisconsin.
Despite the claims of the locals around Mackinaw City,we found plenty to entertain us on the Upper Peninsula...Painted Rocks Lakeshore was spectacular (thanks for the tip Monster),and Lakenenland,a collection of junk-art outside of Chocolay,was well worth a visit.'Da Yoopers Tourist Trap' (I forget where) was an unashamed attempt to cash in on...well,not much,but it made us laugh (especially the 'Dinosaur Gonad' - a round rock - 'excavated' whilst they were building the establishment,) and we spent some money there.'Yooper' philosophy seems to be pretty close to Geordie,maybe they're a lost tribe of Northerners.
Highlights of Wisconsin included the Nightfall Motel (Woodruff),where we received the warmest of welcomes from the people who run it,and The ForeverTron (another collection of junk-art,constructed from old fairground and carnival equipment) which was simply jaw-dropping.Oh yes,and a model of a Giant Badger which guards a 'Gentleman's Club'.Low points were Wisconsin Dells,which alleges itself the 'Waterpark Capital'.I'm sure its fine for those seeking that kind of entertainment,but the sheer quantity of billboards per mile set my teeth clean on edge,it reminded us too much of home (the worst kind of tourist trap).
We're finding Illinois a bit more puzzling.Probably due to the 90+ degrees of heat.We had to abandon ship and pull in to a motel early today,and I'm sitting typing half baked down my right hand side,from sitting in the passenger seat.That was through the window glass too.
I am,however,soothing the pain.We've discovered that Walmart (oppressors of the working man they may be,but I have very few ethics when it comes to spending our accumulated hard-earned cash) sells Wild Turkey Whiskey for under $20 a bottle.We'd usually pay around 25 UKP (about $40,I think at current exchange rates) at home,thats if we could find a store that stocked it on a regular basis.
I'd type more,but I feel a drunkening coming on :D
*burp
Cheers!
Dim&Persistence

Didn't we warn you about Wisconsin Dells? we meant to, sorry :o

Must have been the Budweiser that made me forget.:blush:
Our motel even had some sort of local band playing outside until about 11-30.I have no objection to live entertainment,but it has to be music I like,and I'm not much into 80's Hair Rock,Persistence was a little entertained tho.I was more freaked out to walk past and see many bikers,with no beer coolers,and not a whiff of anything illicit upon the breeze.
No offence meant to anyone who lives there,but it was a bit like Blackpool,minus the charm,but cleaner.

If you do go to Mammouth Caves, expect more of the same.....

*crosses Mammoth Caves off the list.
After googling ticket prices...
*crosses Graceland off the list.

I still think Graceland's worth visiting -yeah $28 is a lot of moolah, but it is interesting, even if you weren't a fan. Maybe sleep in your car one night and use the motel money? :lol:

Too late,we've already busted westward :(

On the outskirts of St.Louis now,after visiting the 'Our Lady of the Snows' shrine,Cahokia Mounds and trying to track down a painting of a Piasa Bird in Alton (tonight's motel has a guide with the address for that one,we'll get it tomorrow.).

I'm quite unsure about St.Louis,we've either been circling it all day,like a predator circles its prey,or its slowly sucking us in,like we're caught in its gravitational pull.

I'm wanting to go visit the Gateway Arch tomorrow,after laundry duty and that painting,Persistence keeps pulling faces tho,I dont think she wants to get any closer to the city than we already are.

...free beer at the factory......

you gotta go up the arch. the stick you in a pod like the inside of a cable reel.....

Garden of Eden in West Central Kansas off of I70 a piece.

Leila's Hair Museum in Independence, MO

Didnt realise you could get to the top of the arch,and it looks like we get a discount for our Annual National Parks Pass thingy,that might have just sealed the deal for Persistence.

The Garden of Eden is a probable too,but I'm finding that Hair Museum just a little too creepy.Maybe its a European thing.If I could get a haircut while I was there,I'd probably be up for it tho.I'm gonna need to get sheared pretty soon :D

hey yo, dwellars, these people are cool... if anyone can see their way to offering them a bed for the night, I'm pretty sure they won't steal the family cat and they'd have more $$ to experience the real weirdness that you Merkins have managed to throw together. or if not a bed, then at least a meal with veggies. I think they've had three vitamins between them since they landed -two when they can to see us and one by accident in a McDonald's salad for which the manager heartily apologised......

Ya know, Sundae Girls' parents could give you a few pointers for dealing with that situation.

Monster. I'm up, if they pass this way.

I believe they're afraid of The South.... :lol:

It's been 3 days.... maybe they're stuck in the Arch? Sycamore! Send out a search and Rescue party! don't forget to check under the vats at the Bud factory....

Good thing the Bud factory aint in the south.

Yeah,we've had a bit of 'Misery in Missouri'.I wasnt feeling well a couple of days ago and Persistence took charge of the navigation for a night,planning our route through that state.
Not to impugn her abilities (its a long walk home!),but we ended up in SW Missouri,at Branson.I'll apologise to anyone in advance who may be from there,or has family there,or if their dog has bitten someone from there...I'm not taking a pop at them,its all in good fun :D
If I was rattled by Wisconsin Dells,Branson definately gave me 'the fear'.Its like Hillbilly Las Vegas.Thats an unfair comment,actually,as I havent been to Vegas yet.Missouri is an otherwise delightful state,green and lush,but Branson seems like an infection (its expanding too,heavy-plant machinery happily chomps away at the hills that surround it,making room for more motels and theaters)...it must be something of a Mecca for Country and Western fans,which in itself isnt bad (tho not to my taste)....ageing Stars perform alongside the revenants of Stars long-dead.I thought I could take it,but I soon started pounding my head on the passenger window in an attempt to knock myself out (having finished the whiskey last night).The faces of Acts unknown outside of America start gurning down from billboards some 50 miles outside of town,and they vie each other for frequency as the distance to town decreases.Scary stuff.
I shouldnt really have a pop at them,as I didnt stay long enough in town to investigate them thoroughly enough,they may well have been quite entertaining.Its 'Family Fun' on an industrial scale,terrifying in magnitude.I'm glad I visited tbh,I would not have believed such a place existed had I not witnessed it myself.
We panicked,snapping photos from the car drive-by fashion at the things we'd come to see,and fled,thoroughly disturbed.Tensions rose as the SatNav became confused at the ever-changing layout of the roads,and escape seemed unlikely,until I guessed at a road and got lucky.
Running aimlessly,we scuttled past Springfield,making it to Joplin.I didnt fancy the motel there much,it was painted the same shade of lurid yellow that we'd witnessed earlier,and we were afraid of the possibility of flash-backs.I've dragged us about another 50 miles north to somewhere semi-sane,near the Kansas border,and we've spent the evening planning our path across there.And watching Disney's 'Up',which is actually a very good movie for young and old alike.

Forgive me Branson,you'll live with for a long time.You and I are at odds on what qualifies as entertainment,you represent what my home town aspires to be.May it never come to pass,and may you remain...maginificent?

Well there's the Dog Bark up north. :D

Oh yes, Branson is very weird. As a general rule, old people think it is the best place to vacation ever.

During the Christmas season it's nice. I had a horse drawn sleigh ride to see the deco one year quite a while back. Very old fashioned and indicative of what the season is in my mind. Peaceful and nostalgic.

Just been outside for the last 2 hours admiring an excellent electrical storm over Junction City,Kansas....tried to get a few shots of the lightning with mixed success.Free entertainments always are best :D

It's hard to beat the heartland/southwest for spectacular thunderstorm watching. Sometimes you can see them coming at you for half a day before you're in it.

You can come to NM and meet me in Taos. :) There is a tiny museum there with a stuffed 8 legged lamb. The museum is a a dedication to the "Bent" massacre. I am not really sure if it is commemorated to remind the gringos not to get out of line, or if people really did feel bad for the situation....Interesting town.....


There is also a graveyard where they don't bury their dead very well, and not very deep, in the middle of the city. The groundhogs dig holes right into the graves and come out another side with fresh dead. This creates ventilation for the smell of death that they try and cover up by planting large amounts of lilacs. So you pretty much smell corpses and lilacs. I enjoy it because I am creepy. People still love to be buried there so I guess they enjoy it too. It is the strangest graveyard I think i have ever seen. The cultural influences are spanish, mexican, native american, and of course whities. Some are buried really shallow so there are mounds. Then you see a hole dug that goes straight into the mound. lol! They also leave objects indicating things the person enjoyed, as most likely- a year round celebration of the "days of the dead". It's very festive with plastic flowers and random stuff everywhere. It's actually one of my favorite places. lol!


Yes. I am creepy. I like strange stuff. lol!!

That's gotta be a health violation.

If not a felony.

Persistence and I both worked in kitchens for many many years,we're familiar with Health Violations and Felonies.That Cemetary sounds like good entertainment to me,She's mulling it over tho.That usually means 'no',until I get her good and drunk.

My plans have backfired badly.

Tonight in Hays,Kansas,we've conflicted badly.Booze has brought out several conflicts in our relationship.I was asked why I looked so serious,to which I replied 'I feel a bit of a fat bugger'.I got the response 'Oh well.At least you're not immensely fat.'.

Matters have deteriorated from this point.

I answered said point to be be greeted with the reply 'Excuse me?',which was repeated after I asked if she (Persistence) was either rude or deaf.

Travelling together is something of a journey in itself,I guess.And this after I was enjoying Kansas a lot.We journeyed to northern mid-Kansas today,and you know what?Almost everyone on the road waved at us.Such politeness is unheard of where I come from,and I returned it enthusiastically.

But at Hays,we've hit something of a bump in the road,and tomorrow,I fear for the communication in the car.We've had to adapt to communicating for practical purposes over the last month,but tonights exchanges have highlighted differences in viewpoints.I can only hope that Kansas,or what remains of it,soothes or differences before we hit Colorado.

Oh yeah, that shit happens traveling in close quarters for extended periods.
On the up side, the make up sex is great. :thumb:

Ahh, road trip cabin fever.

Can you go separate ways for a day or two? Just be yourselves, and hook up again soon. Even if you just stay in separate hotels/hostels/spas/brothels, the break might be what you need.

Woot!
Cheers for that,Bruce.I know it'll happen.Its just great to ride teh wild turkeh train until that occurs.
It satisfies my Brit sense of pertpetual (lesser) tension,until it happens.
But as British,we both have to have a sense of 'Eventuall Failure of Empire' until it occurs.(Damn you,you've condemned me to another drink before I retreat bedwards).
As Brits,we now possess a perpetual sensation of 'The Retreat of Empire.'.Its no bad thing,as the current richest nation on Earth,you too will experience the cost of maintaining an Empire,it doesnt come cheap (in blood or money-imperialism's days have come and gone.).
If this looks like a cheap shot at what America has accomplished,you're wrong.I admire what you stand for,and your principles,I despise the popularist competition your political parties have made of it.
Its the competition that still ensues that whcih has caused us to visit you...

As far as 'Forms of Government' goes,even Winston Churchilll said that Democracy is the worst form of Government.
Democracy ensures that almost nothing worthwhile is ever achieved,for long.

I dont look for critique upon this viewpoint.Its 'un-marketable' as far as moderm media is concerned,which ,if you accept that,makes tyranny almost acceptable.Its the changeable nature of 'democracy' that makes it ultimately a poor choice.A continual thread of change or effort is needed.

Must retreat to bed now,as I'm too drunk (in a British style) to draw conclusions from my rantishness,and objectionality.
Good Night,and God Bless.xxxx
Diminish3d

The complete quote is ... except for all the other forms that have been tried through history."

How's the hangover, Dim? seems like you might need to learn to drive ....and fast :lol: Seriously though, find a lake/river somewhere nearby and just chill for a while The oppressive heat gets us all that way. if you live there you get to turn a special kind of crazy. That's why they're all so so inbred there, no-one will have them but their own kin ;)

Hey Dim - Why don't you and she come stop by "my" lake when you cross the CO border - It's big enough you can sit on one side, she on the other, and when you decide you've had enough time apart, come on over to my house for fish tacos, a beer or a margarita (or three) and directions to the Swettsville Junk Museum.

He must have one of those hangovers that makes you feel like a chitlin with the shit slung out of it.

We're in Kansas City. We have a busy month, but do give a call if you need a flop for a night or two. 816-808-3226. We have a large backyard suitable for camping, indoor accomodations can be made, and the camper can be set up, so you have options. :-) KC has an art gallery that should not be missed - The Nelson Adkins Museum. Probably the finest Oriental collection in the nation, as well as a generous helping of Thomas Hart Benton and an impressive Modern Art and Impressionists collection. Located in a great part of town as well. Truman Presidential Museum is in a suburb of KC and is totally awesome, especially if you are a student of WWII and the immediate post war years.

I'm a bit worried about them... not a peep for days....

...and they prolly won't be available until next Easter season.

Long make-up sex.

I hope they come back soon, I love this thread and their stories!

I wonder if Persistence is peeved that diminished chose to include their personal friction in this thread? I believe it was mentioned earlier that friends and family back home were following along.

Cheers folks :beer:, it's that American water, there's something in it that makes people drinking it get rebellious with Brits. Why we sometimes even say naughty things about the Queen's Swans.

I know from personal experience, being with only one person 24/7, on road trips of 6 to 10 thousand miles, will usually lead to some friction along the way. So there's a little flare up and it blows over quickly, that's cool. Part of the bonding process that makes road trips so memorable.

Nah folks,its all good now.We're in SW Colorado (Cortez) and have spent a couple of quality days at Mesa Verde,which is jaw-droppingly spectacular.When they eventually make me King over here,I shall make it a crime not to come to Mesa Verde.
We've had internet issues at the local Super8.We booked in for a couple of nights,but a couple of hours later,their net went toes-up
I went down to try and sort it out,but their desk staff on the first night were less than capable of flicking the power off and on on their wireless router,and on the second night the princess-embryo manning the desk rudely exclaimed that because her myspace page was working on the public lobby PC (which wasnt connected to their wireless network) then my machine must be at fault.Didnt I know how to work a computer?
Needless to say,we're now at a different Motel,and my machine connected to this network and the net,first time of asking.
I left the housekeeping staff at the Super8 a note, explaining that they wouldnt be getting the nice tip I leave everywhere (I dont,but hey,),due to their rude and incompetant desk staff.
I'd have complained to the management,but at no point did anyone seem to be in charge,despite a veritable library of 'Certificates of Excellence' behind the desk.I then thought about taking a c**p in the tip jars that were all over the Motel,and thrust into our lines of sight at every opportunity,but I didnt want to appear ignorant.

Glad to hear you're back in the groove. :thumb:

Cheers Bruce,it took 3 days of tense negotiations,but we agreed that Persistence may have been wrong,but that I was suffering from a man-period :o :blush: :D

Hey whatever it takes to get to the kissing... and stuff. :blush:

Oh yeah,another pro-tip.

Be aware of atmospheric pressure differences when opening a bottle of mustard at 10000 feet.When crossing the continental divide,we stopped to make lunch.I thought my sandwich needed a bit of jazzing up with condiments.The only place the mustard didn't go was meatwards.My hair and the car interior were quite tasty tho.

I'm starting to feel very guilty about not seeing that much of my own country.

Cheers guys! Enjoy.

That's no joke. Last month, when my parents were traveling in Peru, my dad took an empty water bottle and screwed the cap on really tight as they went over a mountain pass. He's a retired physics professor, but will still do an experiment whenever he can. Over the rest of the day they descended down to the Pacific ocean, and he took this picture of the sealed empty bottle next to a full one. I had no idea the pressure difference would be that great.

If you're headed Denver way let me know! Case & Clan are in Fort Collins (even further North) too! HLJ is somewhere above 14,000 feet or something.

yeah we had fun with inflated packets of chips in Santa Fe. they never actually exploded, though.....

my ears are popping just looking at that.

We've found ourselves tonight in southern Utah,we've positioned ourselves for a dash to Monument Valley tomorrow,although we're taking the cheap option of the self-guided drive through tour,the guided stuff looks a bit pricey and doesnt look great value for money,unless anyone can add any info (before tomorrow morning.).
And seeing as we've unintentionally ended up in Utah,we're discussing taking a look around Canyonlands NP,with special emphasis on going to Horseshoe Canyon,to see the ancient pictograms there (7 mile hike,hope it wont be too hot.).Then we're breaking back east into NW Colorado,to resume the plans we made about 10 days back,which in turn were a departure about 3 times removed from what was originally planned so long ago now :D
The mileage count is now around 7500,the photo count is now around 3000.

I believe Monument Valley is a very rough road. Take it real slow to avoid vehicle damage. If it starts to rain, get the hell out because the road is impassable when wet.
Canyonlands is hot and dry, but cool.;)

There are so many awesome places in the south west. I love Capital Reef. There are all these tiny little twisty back canyons you can hike around in. Just don't do it in the rain. Bryce is spectacular, and Zion is pretty damn good too.

Monument Valley was astonishing.You can be very cheap,and view it from the Highway for free,but its so worth the $5 per person for the entry to do the 17-mile self-guided loop,and you'll see a lot more.I'd have happily paid 5x the entry price,and still have thought it was excellent value.
From what we saw,we think we were right about the guided tours.Many open-backed trucks bounced past us at speed with a lot of very uncomfortable-looking people in the back of them.We stopped to take a lot of photos over the 3 hours or so we took to get around,but at no point did we see any stopped tour trucks.The guided tours get to see more stuff,true,but I wouldnt fancy my chances at taking many good shots from the back of one of those vehicles going at speed over that road.
Having said all of that,I turned to Persistence and asked,'How on Earth are we meant to explain this place to people back home?'.It was an astounding day.

Thats awesome to hear! So glad you guys are having such a good trip.