Sunlight?
Ahahahahahaha.....

No.

Awww, there may be a bit.

You're just jaded because you're an Otley girl now.

And then there are people called Creg, I just assumed the guy's name was Craig, but no...

Creg.


What are they orcs?

Is not jade.
Is mould.

He's an orthopedic surgeon

I lied, I've been here in Derby all week. Someone should have noticed from my posting times. Do you think I'd be awake at 4:30 in the Ante fucking Meridiam if it weren't required for my continuing employment? I just didn't want to say until I'm due home, because you people would ransack my shithole rental and steal all my string. I know you.

But it's not really necessary. For fun, I set up a cheap burglar alarm. I have an expensive one that the landlord pays for, but that won't show me who has broken in. Here’s another idea.

I have a Logitech webcam, and it has a motion detection setup where it will start recording to a file when it detects motion.

I configured it to save these videos to my Google Drive.

Then I used this page:

http://www.jellybend.com/2012/12/19/...e-apps-script/

...to set up a Google Docs spreadsheet to monitor the folder where these videos are saved. (Why a spreadsheet: Google has put a nice system of notifications where you can be notified of changes to a spreadsheet. Some clever dude hacked it to include changes to any top-level folder on your Google Drive.)

Bottom line: anything moving in my rooms is recorded, and I am sent an email of the videos.

This is good not just for burglars and ne’er-do-wells, but if there is a roof leak worse than the current one, and infrastructure tumbles or something. Of course if there’s a tornado, the FIOS link and electricity will probably be off before the damage is done. Battery backups are for the real alarm system.

But the down side:

I've been sent 44 videos so far. Whenever the sun goes behind clouds, it changes the image enough for the software to believe there is motion.

This part is to our Brits.

Americans now understand and are amused by sarcastic humor. In fact our culture is now full of it, and we practice it often.

We were not as familiar with sarcasm during the war. Our culture had to grow and expand; before modern times our communication was very sincere and direct, so we didn’t get it back then. I think most cultures have to go through that, to reach a level of sophisticated subtlety with speech. You were nicely ahead of the game and frankly superior with the language you invented. You still are, but America has reached the level where Chandler Bing can be one of the most popular characters written for television.

I know that many stereotypes die hard, but as long as you are going to continue to complain about the sorry nature of our sense of humor, we are going to persist in our outdated belief that you all say “pip pip” and “cheerio”. Which I believe you haven’t done since the 40s.

I say this because I wrote a sarcastic funny email to my boss and showed it to some of my Derby colleagues, and one of them wondered whether he’d get the humor in it, since after all, he is American. I was actually proud of that. An American WROTE the email but mate, you didn't think of that because you are accepting him as one of you. I have achieved my goal of being "half-caste" this week. (and I would be delighted if someone called me that while I'm here)

I guess you did okay with the jet leg, then?

Indeed so full of it, and so often, that at my tender age I had never even known there was a stereotype of non-sarcastic Americans. Our humor is different, no doubt, but I would have labeled us as low-brow or juvenile long before I imagined us to be non-sarcastic. Chyeah.

So post some pictures already.

The idea that Americans don't appreciate sarcasm or irony came to me from American writers. I didn't know enough Americans to know any different.

Then I came here and realised that there is a real cultural difference between Britain and America, but humour has never been in question. I don't expect everyone to share my sense of humour. Even my nearest and dearest only overlap in what we find funny, and I love my father very much but it is rare we laugh at the same things. Finding the same things funny - laughing until you can barely speak - is rare and precious.

I just think the more people you get together, the lower the common denominator is. I don't know if that works mathematically :)
I just seems that stupidity multiplies better than intelligence.
So the bigger the population, the more it has to cater for the masses, and the less the masses expect.
Individual Americans are super-smart, or can be.
The American great unwashed is the same as the great unwashed everywhere, it's just more of them have tv sets than elsewhere.

Anyway.
So.
Where are the photos again.

Wow! It's almost like you have IT expertise. ;):D

Photos of my visit. Really. OK.

http://cellar.org/2014/derby-aircond.jpg

The air conditioner in my hotel room

http://cellar.org/2014/derby-lift.jpg

These are the buttons in the hotel elevator lift. Spot the error. I find it a feature of Britain, not a bug, that the nation is not really all that detail-oriented.

http://cellar.org/2014/derby-socks.jpg

My dirty socks on the dirty carpet of my hotel room. I'm very, very sorry for this shot.

Elevator door closing buttons don't do anything anyway. You may as well replace it with a door open button that won't do anything.

http://cellar.org/2014/derby-view.jpg

My hotel room view. It would have been better but I'm only on the 1st floor. I'm happy about that because I can get 1 bar or WiFi on my tablet (0 bars on the phone and laptop)

http://cellar.org/2014/derby-nearby.jpg

The neighborhood next to the hotel. This is the best part of the neighborhood and it gets pretty dodgy after a few blocks. Shown here is the chip shop that closed at 2pm before I could get anything from it for lunch today. (It's at the far end of the block, you can't really see it.)

http://cellar.org/2014/toad-20140626.jpg

This is what I look like after I've failed to get lunch from the lunch truck, tried to work through it, walked the 20 minutes to the chip shop to find it closes at 2pm, nearly dry heaved in the bushes on the way back, and survived by eating a Cadbury Flake bar, a bag of crisps, and a pint of semi-skimmed milk. In this shot I am extremely distressed and waiting for the food to kick in.

Great foreign lands adventure so far right? Toldja this one was about work and nothing else. Missing is the absolute highlight of my time here, a box from the Isle of Arran with certain goodies in it.

Joyful: I don't have a photo but dogs don't have to be on leads in this country. All dogs I've passed have been off-lead, owners walking nearby, and beautiful and wonderful. I wish I could meet them.

http://cellar.org/2014/derby-lobby.jpg

The hotel lobby of the Days Inn Hotel. It looks like every other Days Inn Hotel lobby. Except that in this nation people enjoy the World Cup in it. Also pints of Stella, a major highlight of this trip. There are no minibars, vending machines, or even ice machines in this hotel, so the Stella, charged to my employer, is an important thing. All my beverages have been bought from the M-to-F pre-op transsexual who mans attends to the front desk.

We walk amongst you!


Muhahahaha

Minibars come with a higher grade of hotel.

Ice machines are unknown - imagine my delight when I went to America for the first time and realised I could just get ice for free, on my way back to the room! Ice! Cold white stuff! I grew up in the 70s and we had a tiny icebox in the top of the fridge which took fishfingers, a packet of peas and at a push a cardboard packet of Neopolitan ice-cream on a birthday. Ice-cubes were a luxury.

Vending machines are usually only in downmarket hotel chains.
So you've fallen between two stools there.

Sorry bout your chippy problem.
Could have been worse. It could have been open...

On this trip I have had almost nothing to buy on my own, so I have been happy to overtip in ridiculous amounts. I do this mostly to feel better about myself, so I am not bragging. I have been leaving a 2 pound coin every day for housekeeping. That's too much. I gave the TS a pound for pouring my Stella and removing my dirty plates, and she seemed to be delighted.

I really like the two-tone 2 pound coin. It looks and feels like the valuable currency that it is. Didn't have these when I was here last time.

I hope you've figured out how to eat!

I ate everything in the box from Isle of Arran, except the chocs which I have saved for tomorrow.

It was DELIGHTFUL

Meantime, for dinner I have only eaten at the hotel, and once at the awesome Indian restaurant next to the hotel. So awesome. 20 years ago the Indian restaurants were by far the best restaurants; I understand that these days Brit cuisine is catching up to the world, and the hotel restaurant is doing just fine.

But they still can't make coffee.

I suppose that the lack of a sea view or breathtaking landscape, is more than compensated for by the sight of the East Midlands Demolition Company.

Could one ask for more? :D

When it comes to a room with a view, some *do* ask for more.



Granted, there's no Sydney Opera House... :p:

Basil Fawlty, my hero.:thumb:

And I'm back!

PHL to Heathrow-
to Heathrow Express at Terminal 5-
to Paddington Station
to King's Cross via Underground
walk to St Pancras for East Midlands train
to Derby
to the hotel,
to work and back for five days...

And this morning, up at 5:15am Derby time to catch the 6am train back through that return round, landing at 4pm Philadelphia time where J waited for me.

I would not try to do that schedule again. Exhausting.

Got upgraded to business class for the return flight! British Airways was very strong both flights. Good food good wine. Customs both ends was under 5 minutes. Security both ends was under 10 minutes.

Signage around London Transport is perfection.

Our American credit cards are no longer guaranteed to work in European systems, because they use the chip-and-PIN system with a smart card that holds your password. I think they must use that system because it doesn't require the vendor to be online in order to process a password-protected transaction. The American "swipe" system was confusing even to the hotel's front desk personnel. (They didn't know the meaning of the term "last 4 digits", which is part of the password protection for our system.)

Next time I might just rent a car. Fuck it, I've done right-hand-drive before.

Told you :lol:
Our "password" is the PIN number we use in the cahpoint machine.
It is issued randomly with the card, although it's possible to change it for something more memorable. I always keep the random number and remember it using rhyming visualisation. We use the last three digits of the security code on the signature strip for verification when buying online or over the phone as a way of enusring the card is present. Doesn't mean it's not stolen, but the thief has to know the postcode the card is registered to as well, and if goods are being ordered they will often only ship to that postcode.

Anyway.
Pretty cool to have an upgrade on the way home!
It soulds like it came at just the right time.

Your journey was longer but probably less stressful than mine home from Leeds where once again I had to wait nearly an hour for a bus (which is ridiculous when the sides of said buses trumpet that they run every ten minutes!) Buses from Otley seem to manage it, with one leaving at least every 20 minutes :confused: I hate Leeds and will never go there again voluntarily.

And there was an altercation at the back of the bus which ended with a passenger being told to get off. No actual violence, but violent words and the threat hung in the air. Apparently he was swigging from a wine bottle, and another passenger took exception to this :eek:
Nice town.

Wull there should be an answer to this... the banks here should provide a chipped card for travelers that connects to our accounts. And then they should just leave it on, because why not.

I lost 12 pounds of weight during this trip. Walking all over the place, eating an abbreviated lunch every day, hauling luggage for miles, running on adrenaline. The sensible and delicious airline food. Even with the daily Stellas, Limey's excellent treats, and the hotel's previously-frozen hash browns for breakfast.

Wait, what?
Hash browns come in a fresh variety?!

Apparently...

It's pretty simple. Get potato. Grate potato. Brown grated potato.

Ingredients:
Potato

:potatosmilie:

To me it's 1-2cm peeled-then-cubed firm white potatoes, in a hot skillet with bacon fat (or butter if you must), salt and pepper, browned while rarely turning.

Grating the potatoes is an acceptable local variant.

The intellectually-challenged add onions. The posh add paprika. Neither is appropriate.

In these parts, we would call those cubed breakfast potatoes 'home fries.'

But I don't think y'all got the Bob Evans around there.

Yep, them's home fries. Hash browns are grated potatoes. Use McCormicks Season-All.

You are right

Not a regional?

o goddammit

Grating previously baked/jacket potatoes works very nicely and is less likely to end up soggy if you're inattentive while cooking ;)

Various finishes:

A Starbucks Coffee Venti Latte is exactly the same at Heathrow as it is at the one down the street, and no matter what you think of it, that's a pretty amazing thing.

I would happily slip right back into my South Yorks. accent as a 14-year-old if I lived there for six straight weeks. I almost had to remember to be American because that was what was expected of me.

England is fun for an American to visit because everything is just slightly different. The brands are different. The fonts are different. The birds are different. The voltage is different. The switches are different.

Most things are slightly more expensive. People tip less. Portions are smaller, except when they aren't. The cars drive on the other side. The people are slightly friendlier. The business is slightly less cutthroat. The pedestrian is liked. The dogs are trusted.

We must all drink and we insist you will drink with us and we assume completely that you will want to drink with us to the point of needing a cab and it will be funny and there is absolutely zero concern for whether you may or may not be alcoholic or have any reason to avoid alcohol in any way.

Scattered, shattered, smothered, and covered.

:yum:

Which is an Awful Waffle reference, and everyone knows The Waffle House uses actual hashy brown potatoes. I've been to Awful Waffles in my travels, and they're always grated potatoes.

I love some Awful Waffle, Nationwide.

You're right, monster, using previously baked potatoes is a perfect way to make great hash browns. It's all in the browning and the center.

:D and I'm an import (and hash brown convert now I've discovered what they're supposed to be like....)

I always shove a few extra potatoes in the oven when I'm baking them ;)

So it's true that our culture is more full on with the alcohol then?

It's a slightly different attitude. I think we manage to drink as much, but there's a layer of uptight about it.

J, who has previously worked for a Brit company, told me that I would be taken out and gotten drunk. My host narrowly avoided it on the last day with some nearly-forgotten spousal duty.

It was like making sure that some plan was made to entertain the hotel-bound traveler, and that was just normal, but it had to involve drinking. Going to the cricket was not an option, although I had indicated an interest in it. It had to be the pub, even though that was 10 miles away, and I had to wake up at 5 the next morning to leave for home.

Here, if it was a big company, that would be frowned upon (unless the person involved was in sales and then I think the rules differ). There is a certain amount of walking on eggshells. The visitor may be Asian (half of eastern Asians can't really drink much at all, it's biological), or religious (religions we can't identify are a problem), or alcoholic (where the culture is we assume you can't drink at all, and just mentioning it could be a horrible pitfall).

And then there's lack of public transport, combined with the .08 DUI rules which will truly fuck someone over (I don't even know what they do with foreigners who fail to appear in court). We are in this weird middle place on that, where drinking out is becoming simply not possible, and drinking at home means you're automatically an alcoholic.

And, of course, this will differ regionally. Much of the silly valley has started having beer in the office, in case it's something top software talent wants. And like a foosball table, it's less expensive than 10% more salary. Failure to have a "fun" office in the Silicon Valley can be the death knell for your company. (Where "fun" means you can drink at work, not that you don't have bosses who don't know how to manage people, and stuff.)

Yeah, Mr. Clod's company has foreign visitors fairly regularly, and the celebrations are always of the "going out to dinner" variety. Some get drinks with dinner, others don't, but no one goes beyond tipsy and no one mentions anyone else's consumption, or lack thereof.

Hash Browns:

http://www.simplyrecipes.com/wp-cont...h-browns-1.jpg

Home Fries:

http://www.hiddenboston.com/images/M...sHomeFries.jpg

One last thing, the soap dispenser in the hotel was terrible. It only dripped a wee little bit of soap out. But I fixed that.

Lol, mook.